Even the Lone Ranger Had Tonto

Growing up, one of my favorite television shows was “The Lone Ranger.” Every Saturday morning I’d sit in front of the TV to watch the latest exploits of the masked, mysterious champion of justice. He’d ride into town unannounced, take care of the bad guys, and ride off into the sunset on his trusty white steed, Silver, shouting, “Hi-yo, Silver, away!” 

However, Baby Boomers like me will remember the Lone Ranger wasn’t alone. Somewhere along the way he’d picked up a companion named Tonto, an Indian. (Today, the correct term is native American.) Tonto never had much to say but was always there to help whenever needed. In fact, Tonto had a nickname for the Lone Ranger, “Kemosabe,” one meaning of which is “faithful friend.”

 

One of the challenges in effectively living a life of faith is the temptation to be a “lone ranger” Christian. We might attend church, maybe even read the Bible with some consistency, but don’t have other believers we engage with on a regular basis. We haven’t made a point of developing some “faithful friends” to stand by us.

 

Perhaps this is a product of the pervasive messaging from the “Me Generation,” focusing on individual needs and wants. Or maybe it’s because of our American culture, which has long promoted individualism, a “pull yourself up by your own bootstraps” mentality. Reading the Scriptures, however, we don’t find any endorsement for an independent, ‘I can do it all by myself’ mindset.

 

To the contrary, we see an emphasis on community, providing mutual support and encouragement along the arduous path of what we can call our spiritual journey. For instance, Hebrew 10:24-25 instructs, “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another – and all the more as you see the Day approaching.”

 

Many a one-time zealous believer has been derailed because he or she did not have caring Christian friends to ‘spur them on toward love and good deeds.’ The walk of faith with Jesus Christ is wonderful, but whoever said it’s easy either hadn't been a believer very long or wasn’t being truthful. Because being made new in Christ (2 Corinthians 5:17) doesn’t make us immune to the problems, pain and pitfalls of living in a sin-broken world.

 

Another passage speaks of the benefits of not living an isolated life, but rather partnering with others in whatever we’re endeavoring to do: “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work. If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they can keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12).

 

There’s a lot packed into those verses, but they underscore the power and synergy of teaming up with others in striving to achieve common goals. It includes being able to accomplish far more by working together than operating independently; being available to assist when we stumble along the way – which we’re all prone to do; finding warmth and comfort; and joining in defense against dangers and formidable obstacles. Sometimes pride causes us to want to declare, “I did it my way – without any help,” but there’s great joy and satisfaction in collaborating to achieve something worthwhile.

 

We can find our ‘faithful friends’ in many settings. It could be a small group at church, where we slowly build close, genuine relationships. An accountability group in which members can help one another in atmospheres of trust and mutual concern. A discipling or mentoring relationship that can foster spiritual, personal and/or professional growth. As Proverbs 27:17 points out, “As iron sharpens iron, so one man [person] sharpens another.”

 

When we hear of a prominent Christian leader falling into sin, it’s very likely failure to maintain open, honest, accountable relationships with other believers was a contributing cause. The same is true of once ardent Christ followers who suddenly stop attending church, taking part in opportunities for spiritual growth and support, or even associating with other believers. At some point they decided they could go it alone as ‘lone Christian rangers,’ only to tragically discover that it doesn’t work.

 

The human body is a wondrous machine. It consists of a variety of organs, limbs, bones and other critical elements. When they’re all working together, we’re healthy. But when one or more of them isn’t operating properly, we become ill or diseased. The apostle Paul used the body as a metaphor to underscore how much we need each other.

“The body is a unit, though it is made up of many parts; and though all its parts are many, they form one body. So it is with Christ…. God has combined the members of the body and has given greater honor to the parts that lacked it, so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it” (1 Corinthians 12:12-26).

 

The Lord created the human body – and the body of Christ. Both work best when all the members are united in a common purpose, supporting and strengthening one another for the opportunities and challenges of each day. If you find yourself trying to follow Jesus as a ‘lone ranger,’ pray for God to bring at least one ‘Tonto’ who can come alongside you. 

More Connected Than Ever, But Desperately Alone

Being a career journalist and writer, I’ve always been fascinated by communications. I often marvel in thinking about how much the art of communicating has changed just in my lifetime.

 

For instance, my first memories of the telephone: it was the old-fashioned kind, with receiver cradled on its base, a rotating dial for placing a call, and a simple combination of letters and digits for a phone number. The first one I remember was CH (for Charter) followed by five numbers. We didn’t have an area code yet.

 

For a while we had a “party line,” sharing the same phone line with one or more neighbors. Occasionally we’d pick up the receiver to make a call and hear someone else’s voices on the same line. We’d have to wait for them to hang up before we could use the phone ourselves. When our phone did ring, we had to pick up the receiver and hear the voice to find out who was calling. Can you believe it? 

We’d fret over missing a phone call because there were no answering machines – and nothing vaguely resembling voicemail. Printed telephone books contained the names, addresses and phone numbers of everyone in our town. If the city was large, the phone books were huge. The alternative was to dial ‘0’ and get a real person called an “operator” who could provide needed information and phone numbers. Social media? The only thing remotely akin to that was secretively listening in on a party line conversation.

 

Fast forward to today: Never in the history of civilization have people been more connected. We’ve got phones, email, texting, the Internet, hundreds of TV and cable networks, streaming services, and video communications platforms. Everything literally at our fingertips. And yet, people have never been more isolated.

 

Why do we, surrounded by such a vast communications jungle, sometimes feel so desperately alone? Because no matter how many “friends” we may have on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn, Twitter or any other social medium, there’s no substitute for eye-to-eye contact and a human touch.

 

We were created for relationship, first with God and then with one another. In the creation account given in the opening chapter of Genesis, after He created animals, birds, fish and other living things “according to their kinds,” the Lord decided to create humankind. “Then God said, ‘Let us make man in our image, in our likeness…’” (Genesis 1:26).

 

God clearly desired relationships with His foremost creations – man and woman. After all the wondrous but non-speaking living things He designed, the Trinity of God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit wanted a mutual love relationship with mankind. But after “the Lord God formed the man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life” (Genesis 2:7), the Lord understood the man needed companionship. We might say, someone with skin on.

 

“The Lord God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him’” (Genesis 2:18). After introducing Adam to “all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air,” God determined “for Adam no suitable helper was found…. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, ‘This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh….’ For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife…” (Genesis 2:19,22-24).

 

Ever since that time, human history has been an unending saga of relationships, good and bad, healthy and unhealthy. As we were designed, God wanted us to yearn for eye contact, touch, conversation, and even the scent of other human beings.

 

Despite its many benefits, technology can provide no substitute for these needs. That’s why we read declarations such as Proverbs 27:17, “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another” – as we interact and rub shoulders with one another, we can help each other become better people. 

 

In relationship we can support one another and help in carrying each other’s burdens: “Two are better than one because they have a good return for their work; if one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12).

 

During the pandemic, many churches were closed, ostensibly for health reasons. But those closures didn’t enhance spiritual vitality. We need one another – followers of Jesus Christ aren’t intended to function in desperate aloneness. This is why we’re admonished in Hebrews 10:24-25, “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another….”

Relationships are hard. It’s easier to press “Like” on social media or type a quick reply to someone’s post. But relationships are vital. We need to be intentional, to look up (from our smartphones) not only to smell the roses but also to enjoy and engage in the real relationships all around us. 

Peer Pressure: Perilous or Positive?

Did you hear about the ship that was faulted for damaging a large dock? They said it caused unnecessary pier pressure. (Lame joke, I know – but I’m a dad, so I’m told that makes it okay.) But growing up, I heard a lot about its homonym, peer pressure.

 

Most of the time, peer pressure was referred to in negative terms, such as fellow students coercing or persuading someone to do something they knew they shouldn’t. “If your friend jumped off a bridge, would you do it too?!” 

And without doubt, the power – and potential perils – of such peer pressure these days might be greater than it’s ever been: “Challenges” being posted on social media, often to do dumb or even dangerous things. Demands by the “in crowd” at school to behave, dress and even speak in certain ways. Protests promoting and endorsing certain lifestyles and worldviews. 

 

I know of a parent planning to remove a child from her present school because of relentless peer pressure. Even though the daughter is popular, she’s being pressed by her peers to engage in activities her parents have consistently taught her were wrong.

 

Once regarded as primarily a teenage phenomenon, it seems more than ever peer pressure has extended its reach to all age levels. We’ve seen its effects in terms of how people responded to pronouncements regarding COVID and vaccinations, political perspectives, views on myriad social issues and concerns, even types of recreation and entertainment to engage in. Sometimes that’s a good thing; sometimes it’s not.

 

In the Bible we don’t find the term peer pressure, but it’s addressed just the same – both in the positive and negative senses of the word. Proverbs 22;24-25 warns, “Do not associate with a hot-tempered man, do not associate with one easily angered, or you may learn his ways and get yourself ensnared.” Uncontrolled anger is not a trait worth emulating.

 

Another passage admonishes, “Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company corrupts good character” (1 Corinthians 15:33). Another translation states it, “Evil companionships corrupt good morals.” Behavior, good and bad, is both caught and taught.

 

However, peer pressure also can provide great benefits, as the Scriptures repeatedly affirm. For instance, the value of mutual encouragement: “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another – and all the more as you see the Day approaching” (Hebrews 10:24-25).

 

The importance of maintaining a sharp blade is everyday reality for many people, such as lumberjacks and chefs. As followers of Christ, we too must strive to remain “sharp” in living out our faith. This is why we’re instructed, “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17). As we “rub together,” we can keep each other sharp and focused.

 

What we know as the “Christian life” was never intended to be lived in isolation. We each have our own strengths, abilities and gifts, but to effectively serve the Lord we need to support, cooperation, and “peer pressure” of one another: “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work. If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!... Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12).

 

Other than the relationship of Jesus Christ with His disciples, perhaps there’s no better illustration of positive peer pressure in the Bible than the relationship between the apostle Paul and his protégé, Timothy. Paul rightly regarded himself as Timothy’s spiritual father. Over and over, we find him reminding Timothy to hold firmly to the essentials of the faith and never to forget his calling.

 

“Timothy, my son, I give you this instruction in keeping with the prophecies once made about you, so that by following them you may fight the good fight, holding on to faith and a good conscience. Some have rejected these and so have shipwrecked their faith…” (1 Timothy 1:18-19).

 

In a subsequent letter, Paul offers this exhortation: “You then, my son, be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus. And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable men who will also be qualified to teach others. Endure hardship with us like a good soldier of Christ Jesus” (2 Timothy 2:1-3).

As we persevere in our journey of faith, we’d be wise not to avoid peer pressure – as long as it’s pressing us closer to the Lord, not pulling us away from Him. 

Not One of Us Is as Smart as All of Us

For the most part, we live in an individualistic, some say even narcissistic, world. It’s the age of the “selfie,” SnapChat and TikTok: “It’s all about me!” on steroids. Not to disparage folks who frequent such apps, but it’s a shame more of us haven’t bought into the “we’re better together” philosophy.

 

Years ago, a friend at work would often comment, “Not one of us is as smart as all of us.” If we ponder that for a moment, we understand the truth of such a simple statement. We all bring something different to the party, so to speak, and to maximize our success, we need one another.

Over my 17 years as a magazine editor, I had many highlights, including the people I interviewed for articles – folks both well-known and unknown, but all outstanding, inspirational examples of what it means to live and work for Jesus Christ. Traveling to interesting places and writing articles based on those interviews were great fun. But some of my most memorable moments came during planning meetings for the magazine. 

 

Being responsible for the magazine’s content, I would arrive for each session with concepts about how the articles should be presented. But our graphic designer, my assistant editor, and other staff people would come with their own points of view. We’d bounce ideas back and forth, sometimes laughing, sometimes arguing, but always in the spirit of creative friction with a shared goal of producing the best possible edition of the magazine.

 

Without fail, once we reviewed the final, printed copies of the publication, we’d conclude that the whole – the end result – was greater than the sum of the parts. We became living proof of my friend’s “not one of us is as smart as all of us” adage.

 

Thinking about teams, competitors on an athletic field or sports arena typically come to mind, but teams are important for virtually any area of endeavor, whether it’s in business, the home, a classroom, repair shop, construction site, retail store, emergency responders, or even politics. Just as long as the mission embraced is shared and has higher priority than personal agendas.

 

Two of my favorite “teamwork” passages from the Scriptures come to mind, the first being, “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17). Over the course of my working career, I’ve experienced many times when people helped me become better at what I was doing – and I’d like to think I somehow assisted some in their work, too. 

 

This is true in marriages as well. The adage says “opposites attract,” but even when a husband and wife have similar interests and temperaments, they can still learn to complement themselves in areas where they are different.

 

During the climactic stage of His creation, God determined, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him” (Genesis 2:18). The term “helper” might be better translated “completer,” or as one Bible’s footnote suggests, “The woman was made by God to complement him, to make up for the man’s deficiency.” Over more than 4½ decades of marriage, this has the experience my wife and I have had – partnering together and complementing one another, “iron sharpening iron.”

Another passage in the Scriptures that underscores the importance of teaming together is Ecclesiastes 4:9-12, which says:

“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work; if one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

 

If you take a long strand of thread, you can probably break it with relative ease. If you add a second strand, you still might be able to snap them in two. But if you take three or more strands of thread and twist them together, it will be difficult if not impossible to break them. That, in a sense, is how a good team works together, supporting one another and complementing each other’s strengths. 

 

This is one reason God uses the human body as a metaphor for His earthly “body,” the Church. Being in a variety of congregations and denominations, we might have differences in worship styles, traditions and doctrinal emphasis. But as the apostle Paul admonished, calling for unity among believers:

“The body is a unit, though it is made up of many parts; and though all its parts are many, they form one body. So it is with Christ. For we were all baptized by one Spirit into one body – whether Jews or Greeks, slave or free – and we were all given the one Spirit to drink…. Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it…” (1 Corinthians 12:12-31).

Each one of us has individual goals and objectives in life, but for the most part we’ll find that if we work together, pooling our resources and capitalizing on our respective talents and strengths, the likelihood of achieving those goals and objectives will be much greater. Because not one of us is as smart as all of us. 

Are We Overlooking the Greater Pandemic?

Can you remember back about two years, when none of us had ever heard of the coronavirus? Thoughts of COVID-19 had never crossed our minds. These days, however, the latest pandemic developments dominate newspaper and TV news coverage. We can’t escape the frightening reports. At the same time, as this global crisis continues, I wonder if there’s an even greater “pandemic” that’s getting no attention.

 

I’m referring to a problem that actually began building long before the first words about the virus were uttered – the pandemic of loneliness. One example is social media and how it has come to dominate many of our lives. They have created an artificial environment when we can have hundreds – even thousands – of “friends” and still be desperately lonely because we have no one with whom to talk and confide on a deep, personal level.

 

We’ve been bombarded by the statistics about COVID-19 deaths and the millions of other confirmed cases. But the realities about the impact of shutdowns, work stoppages and social isolation have not received nearly as much notice. People who regularly received support and fellowship from church, as well as other social activities, have understandably felt alone, even abandoned.

Suicides, drug overdoses, domestic violence and emotional breakdowns have escalated dramatically. It would be overly simplistic to blame those solely on the pandemic, but experts confirm it has been a very significant factor in the alarming increase of these and other social ills.

 

From the first moments of creation, God has underscored the importance of relationships. Referring to the eternally existing Trinity, Genesis 1:26 says, “Then God said, ‘Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth….’” And soon after He formed the first human, the Lord said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him” (Genesis 2:18).

 

Granted, some people are more sociable than others. Extroverts, by nature, need to be around people to remain energized while introverts – like me – prefer our interactions with others in smaller doses. But we all need to be around other folks to remain mentally, emotionally and even spiritually healthy.

 

Social media can be useful, but only to a limited degree. According to Facebook, I have more than 1,000 “friends,” but most of them I’ve never met in person. I could probably pass many of them on the street and not recognize them. And I wouldn’t want to have 1,000 real friends with whom I interact on a regular basis – who has time for that?

 

But we do need friends, including but not limited to family members. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 tells us, “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!... Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

 

Proverbs 27:17 expresses a similar sentiment: “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” Imagine attempting to sharpen a knife blade without something to hone it. Some of my most enjoyable times at work occurred when a small group of us gathered and engaged in creative friction.

 

The need to do whatever we can to escape the plague of loneliness is even more critical spiritually. One of my favorite passages concerning this is Hebrews 10:24-25, which admonishes, “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another – and all the more as you see the Day approaching.” 

 

During His earthly ministry, Jesus probably could have been a loner, walking from town to city by Himself, but He chose to select followers. This was in part to train them for carrying on His work after His death, resurrection and ascension. However, being both fully God and fully man, I suspect even Jesus needed the companionship and daily interactions. He often recruited them by simply saying, “Come and you will see” and “Follow Me” (Matthew 1:35-51).

 

It's important to recognize our own need for personal interactions that go far deeper than comments and “likes” on social media, even during a global health crisis that has impeded many of us from spending time with one another as we have in the past. We should also be sensitive to the needs of others, especially folks in places like nursing homes and hospitals, who might feel forgotten and unwanted. 

Recently I found an apt observation by Charles Ringma in his book, Dare to Journey with Henri Nouwen. He writes, “We are called to serve the world in which we live. Such serving is not simply a matter of techniques. It is also a matter of personal encounter. It is a matter of drawing close. It is a matter of care.” Think about that. 

Life Is a Collaborative Effort

The older I get, the more convinced I become that we can’t get to where we want to be alone. When we’re in school, teachers help us not only to learn but also encourage us. The best teachers have the discernment to point students in the right direction, in terms of their interests and abilities.

In the workplace, even the most talented individuals must rely on others for help in reaching their goals and objectives. The person who believes, “I got to where I am all by myself,” is self-deluded. Even the one who has reached the top of the corporate ladder still needed someone to build the ladder, and others to hold the ladder while he or she was climbing.

Right now I’m wrapping up work on a book project that I’ve been involved with for more than two years. The writing is finished, but before finalizing the manuscript for publication, we have several sets of eyes on it to proofread and edit. As the adage goes, a writer is his own worst editor. So it’s necessary for others to spot the annoying typos, misspellings, and grammatical and punctuation errors I’ve overlooked. The writer sees what is supposed to be there; the good editor sees what is there and recognizes when changes and corrections are needed.

This applies for any endeavor in life. We just had a badly clogged kitchen sink, and two plumbers came to our rescue to fix the problem. This was not a case of one working and the other watching. They worked collaboratively to locate the pesky clog and get rid of it. It took them together about an hour. One person working alone could have taken all day, and might not have been able to remove the clog at all.

One of my favorite passages in the Bible related to this is Ecclesiastes 4:9-12. I’ve mentioned it in previous posts, but it’s always good to review. It says: 

“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

Consider parenting and raising a family. Single parents do courageous, incredible jobs, but caring for and nurturing children, along with earning an income and operating a household, is so much easier when both a husband and wife – a mother and father – are present to share in the joys, struggles, decision-making, and daily responsibilities.

It's been this way since the beginning. When God created Eve, it was after He had observed Adam and understood his need for companionship and partnership. So the Lord declared, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him” (Genesis 2:18). Who knows? Adam might have had a faithful dog to keep him company first, but that was clearly not enough. The first man needed another human to collaborate with him on the adventure we all know as “everyday life.”

The spiritual life also is intended as a collaboration. We each should seek to spend time every day alone with God, in prayer, reading and studying the Scriptures, and meditating on Him and His truth. But as Proverbs 27:17 tells us, “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” When I consider what this says, I visualize two pieces of metal clashing against each other, at times generating sparks. The result is not to cause damage, but to hone and sharpen for more effectiveness.

I’m so thankful for the many people the Lord has brought into my life to sharpen me, not only personally and professionally, but also spiritually. I still need people like that. We never outgrow our need for “sharpeners,” and I actively look for people to engage with on a regular basis, trusting that as they are sharpening me, I’m also being used by God to sharpen them. 

We live in an age when more and more people are becoming isolated, even alienated from society. They have replaced genuine relationships with social media “friends” and connections. For them, video games and the Internet have assumed the role activities like tennis, golf, fishing, playing cards, board games, and just casual conversation historically have had in the lives of most of us. They lack someone to look them in the eyes, who cares enough to build them up when they’re feeling down and also to challenge or rebuke them when the need arises. And it always does – for all of us. 

Yes, we can exist without healthy connections with others. But why would we want to do so? Your computer can’t give you a warm hug when you need it; or make eye contact and recognize when you need someone to talk to, laugh with, cry with or pray with. Life is best lived in collaboration with others. As God declared when time began, it is not good to be alone.

Who do you have in your life that is helping to sharpen you? Are you available to be used to sharpen others in their own journey? If there is no one there right now, are you willing to pray and ask the Lord to send someone your way?

Strength and Safety in Numbers

Before our recent trip to Italy, we read articles and viewed videos about the do’s and don’ts about travel overseas. A lot of the supposed advice, such as not to wear shorts or T-shirts, proved to be off-base. Especially because when we went in late July, with temperatures stuck in the 90s (not sure what that was in Celsius), going around in shorts and the lightest shirts possible was definitely the way to go.

One of our stops in Italy was the island of Capri. Our
tour group provided companionship and safety.

Another admonition was to be wary of pickpockets, or individuals seeking to scam you out of your possessions by using various techniques. Although we never encountered situations like these, there might have been good reason. 

Most of the time we were with a tour group of 29 men and women, including our tour guide. While none of us would have been mistaken for bouncers or professional wrestlers, I’m sure our sheer numbers would have discouraged potential con artists. As they say, there is strength and safety in numbers.

We see examples of this in everyday life all the time. I haven’t had an opportunity to see the giant redwoods along the Pacific Coast, but I’ve heard many of them tower more than 300 feet tall. At that height, we would rightfully assume they have a very deep root system to anchor them. However, roots for the redwoods (Sequoia sempervirens is the official scientific name) are very shallow, typically not deeper than five or six feet. 

So what’s the secret of their stability? Those same roots can extend up to 100 feet, and they intertwine with the roots of neighboring redwood trees. The trees thrive in thick groves, where they fuse their roots together and form a natural support system. 

Remember the thin, No. 2 pencils we used in school? I recall being able to take one, hold it between my outstretched fingers and with little effort, being able to snap it in two. For a moment, we could feel like Superman. But put two between one’s fingers at one time and the task got much harder; try three at a time and it might be the finger bones that did the snapping.

The same principle holds true even for relatively thin pieces of string. In fact, the Bible says as much: “A cord of three strands is not easily broken” (Ecclesiastes 4:12).

Do you ever watch TV crime shows, maybe “NCIS” or one of the detective series? In almost every episode, some knucklehead decides to walk down a dark alley or into a forest at night. Oh, no! You know what’s going to happen: Nothing good! I have no affinity for dark alleys, period – but if I ever had to go into one, I’d make sure to gather several burly, mean-looking friends of mine to accompany me.

I’ve discovered this is one big reason men are eager to engage in mentoring relationships. Personal growth, whether from a professional or spiritual standpoint, is much more difficult when attempted in isolation. They might try to develop on their own, but it proves to be a slow, frustrating, even futile pursuit. Too many distractions and pitfalls along the way. 

We need the constructive, sometimes creative friction that we gain by being together as mentor and mentoring partner to grow and mature most effectively. Proverbs 27:17 puts it this way: “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” 

Sad but true, the world around us has become less and less safe. As they say, it’s a jungle out there. Especially from a spiritual perspective. The Scriptures tell us, “Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour” (1 Peter 5:8). There are two ways to avoid this danger. The first is to flee. The second is to travel in the company of fellow believers, supporting and encouraging one another, and applying the principle that there truly is strength and safety in numbers.

It Takes a Village...to Raise a Believer

It takes a "village" for us to become all we can be spiritually.

It’s been said it takes a village to raise a child. I have mixed feelings about that declaration, but over my years of following Jesus Christ, it’s become clear that it does take a “village” to raise a believer to spiritual maturity and fruitfulness.

So many people over the years have had a positive impact in my life spiritually, I’ve lost count. If I were to paraphrase the famous poem by Elizabeth Barrett Browning, I’d write, “How do they inspire (or challenge, or encourage) me? Let me count the ways.” 

Some have helped me in reading and studying the Bible. Others have taught me how to apply what I’ve read, embracing the reality that it’s as much for the now-and-now as it is for the sweet by and by. At a time when I was struggling to “do” Christianity, God sent individuals into my life that showed who the Bible teaches we truly are in Christ, and that it’s about the Lord working in and through us. The pressure isn’t on me to “do,” because it’s already done, they taught me.

Pastors, speakers and writers have given me many deep and invaluable insights into principles from the Scriptures. But more than anything, it’s been “lay people” serving as models of what true followers of Jesus look like that have made the most profound impressions on my life.

This isn’t unique for me. Many times in both the Old and New testaments we find proof that a living, growing faith in the Lord can’t be achieved in isolation. Virtually all of the great people in the Scriptures had others come alongside to support them and, when necessary, prod them along. 

The Bible affirms we desperately need others to become all God intends for us to be. For instance, Proverbs 27:17 states, “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” Sometimes this amounts to constructive conflict, similar to the friction of one knife blade being used to sharpen another. 

We tend to select friends who affirm us, who think similarly to the way we do. But good friends – true friends – also are those who care enough, and have the courage, to tell us what we need to hear, not just what we want to hear. “Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of one’s friend springs from his earnest counsel,” we’re told in Proverbs 27:9. That’s the value of accountability groups, as well as peer advisory groups that many business and professional people find helpful. We need that for our journey of faith as well.

In the Bible, the human body serves as a metaphor for the Church, the body of Christ. It points to the roles and functions of different body parts, and how they work together. “The body is a unit, though it is made up of many parts, and though all its parts are many, they form one body…. If the foot should say, ‘Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body,’ it would not for that reason cease to be part of the body…. But in fact God has arranged the parts of the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be…. Now you are the body of Christ, and each of you is a part of it” (1 Corinthians 12:12-27).

As followers of Christ grow in maturity and fruitfulness, we learn of our importance – and how much we need others – for effectively fulfilling God’s purposes. As Ephesians 4:12-13 states, “to equip his people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.” 

Just as Jesus’ first disciples learned invaluable lessons by being “with Him” (Mark 3:14), the so-called “Christian life” isn’t a solo act. We need each other to grow, receive support, and complement one another’s gifts and talents in our quest to be used by God to advance His kingdom.

Two Are Usually Better Than One

There’s a story, apparently true, about two men who escaped from a Siberian prison camp. As you probably know, it gets very cold there and outdoor travel isn’t a heartwarming experience. Not knowing their actual names, let’s call them Boris and Nikolai.

Boris was stronger than Nikolai, and eventually the weaker one started lagging behind. Rather than abandon his companion, Boris resolved to do everything he could to assist Nikolai as they continued toward hopeful freedom.

He would rigorously rub the other’s extremities to stave off frostbite. When the two stopped to rest, they huddled together to share bodily warmth. The one benefit of the severe cold was that prison officers soon gave up pursuit of the escapees. Progress was slow, and at times the two were tempted to give up, but they persevered. Days later they crossed a border to safety.

It helps to be accompanied by someone else
in facing life's waves,storms - and its joys.

Only later did Boris realize how his kindness toward the weaker friend had saved his own life as well. Working to keep Nikolai warm stimulated his own metabolism, enabling Boris to maintain a sufficient temperature so he, too, could survive.  

One doesn’t need to become a fugitive in Siberia, however, to recognize the truth that two usually are superior to one. King Solomon made that assertion when he wrote, “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work. If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm, but how can one keep warm along? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves…” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12).

Solomon didn’t know Boris and Nikolai, but they certainly fit the description. We find this in many other endeavors. It’s a fact two can lift, or pull, more in tandem than they could independently. A gifted violinist may perform her part well, but surrounded by other talented musicians, the music will be much more impressive.

We see the “two is better than one” principle in most sports, whether it’s football, baseball, hockey, basketball, NASCAR or soccer. Even in golf or tennis, with individuals competing alone, we see the benefits of the player having been taught or coached by another person.

For years, I have invested hours nearly every week in mentoring and discipling other men. In our book, The Heart of Mentoring, my friend, the late David Stoddard, and I described mentoring as “a mutually beneficial relationship” in which both mentor and mentoring partner grow and learn from one another. In fact, The Heart of Mentoring would not have come about if Dave and I had not been working together with shared ideas and mission.

Through these mentoring relationships, repeatedly I’ve seen the truth of Proverbs 27:17 manifested: “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” I hope I’ve helped others to grow personally and spiritually, but I know I’ve grown during the process.

These days, our society seems so intent on exalting “self” and “me.” But there’s much to be said for remembering that if it weren’t for others, I couldn’t possibly become me – at least not the “me” that I have the potential for becoming.

I think that’s one reason God ordained marriage, stating “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him” (Genesis 2:18). In a similar way, although I have great respect for single parents, just as it takes two people to make a baby, it’s best for two to be involved in the demanding, never-ending challenge of parenting. “Many hands make light work,” the adage says.

Whether teaching a class, formulating a business proposal, managing finances, raising kids, or trying to grow spiritually, there’s usually strength in numbers. As the old song reminds us, “One is the loneliest number.”