Peer Pressure: Perilous or Positive?

Did you hear about the ship that was faulted for damaging a large dock? They said it caused unnecessary pier pressure. (Lame joke, I know – but I’m a dad, so I’m told that makes it okay.) But growing up, I heard a lot about its homonym, peer pressure.

 

Most of the time, peer pressure was referred to in negative terms, such as fellow students coercing or persuading someone to do something they knew they shouldn’t. “If your friend jumped off a bridge, would you do it too?!” 

And without doubt, the power – and potential perils – of such peer pressure these days might be greater than it’s ever been: “Challenges” being posted on social media, often to do dumb or even dangerous things. Demands by the “in crowd” at school to behave, dress and even speak in certain ways. Protests promoting and endorsing certain lifestyles and worldviews. 

 

I know of a parent planning to remove a child from her present school because of relentless peer pressure. Even though the daughter is popular, she’s being pressed by her peers to engage in activities her parents have consistently taught her were wrong.

 

Once regarded as primarily a teenage phenomenon, it seems more than ever peer pressure has extended its reach to all age levels. We’ve seen its effects in terms of how people responded to pronouncements regarding COVID and vaccinations, political perspectives, views on myriad social issues and concerns, even types of recreation and entertainment to engage in. Sometimes that’s a good thing; sometimes it’s not.

 

In the Bible we don’t find the term peer pressure, but it’s addressed just the same – both in the positive and negative senses of the word. Proverbs 22;24-25 warns, “Do not associate with a hot-tempered man, do not associate with one easily angered, or you may learn his ways and get yourself ensnared.” Uncontrolled anger is not a trait worth emulating.

 

Another passage admonishes, “Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company corrupts good character” (1 Corinthians 15:33). Another translation states it, “Evil companionships corrupt good morals.” Behavior, good and bad, is both caught and taught.

 

However, peer pressure also can provide great benefits, as the Scriptures repeatedly affirm. For instance, the value of mutual encouragement: “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another – and all the more as you see the Day approaching” (Hebrews 10:24-25).

 

The importance of maintaining a sharp blade is everyday reality for many people, such as lumberjacks and chefs. As followers of Christ, we too must strive to remain “sharp” in living out our faith. This is why we’re instructed, “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17). As we “rub together,” we can keep each other sharp and focused.

 

What we know as the “Christian life” was never intended to be lived in isolation. We each have our own strengths, abilities and gifts, but to effectively serve the Lord we need to support, cooperation, and “peer pressure” of one another: “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work. If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!... Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12).

 

Other than the relationship of Jesus Christ with His disciples, perhaps there’s no better illustration of positive peer pressure in the Bible than the relationship between the apostle Paul and his protégé, Timothy. Paul rightly regarded himself as Timothy’s spiritual father. Over and over, we find him reminding Timothy to hold firmly to the essentials of the faith and never to forget his calling.

 

“Timothy, my son, I give you this instruction in keeping with the prophecies once made about you, so that by following them you may fight the good fight, holding on to faith and a good conscience. Some have rejected these and so have shipwrecked their faith…” (1 Timothy 1:18-19).

 

In a subsequent letter, Paul offers this exhortation: “You then, my son, be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus. And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable men who will also be qualified to teach others. Endure hardship with us like a good soldier of Christ Jesus” (2 Timothy 2:1-3).

As we persevere in our journey of faith, we’d be wise not to avoid peer pressure – as long as it’s pressing us closer to the Lord, not pulling us away from Him.