To ‘Friend’ or Not to ‘Friend’

What’s become of friendship? These days it seems being a friend just isn’t what it used to be.

When I was a boy, we found friends basically in two places – the neighborhood and at school. Weekends, time after school, and those lazy crazy days of summer were spent in the physical presence of kids that lived in our subdivision, playing sports and games or just hanging out around the corner fire hydrant. At school I also had friendships, although those were limited to classes and the schoolyard. But we did talk, eye to eye, face to face.

We play fast and loose with the term "friendship."
Real friendships require commitment and camaraderie.

Being friends today, however, has become something different. Friends might gather, but their noses are stuck in their smart phones, texting and tweeting – sometimes to the person standing next to them. Why talk when you can text and tweet, right? And with the explosion of social media, we have an entirely different collection of friends – some we’ll never meet in person.

We have LinkedIn contacts, Twitter followers, and Facebook “friends,” some of whom we connect with through other friends, whether they live in our city or somewhere in cyberspace. Used to be a friend was someone you’d shake hands with, or if so inclined, even share a friendly hug. (With guys, that’s usually a quick embrace, two pats on the back, and then release.)

There are other forms of social media as well, but being the basic introvert that I am, there’s only so much “social” that I can handle. The point is, just because someone comments on your social media posts, exchanges barbs with you occasionally, or “likes” a link that you “share,” does that really make them a friend?

In fact, sometimes a dilemma arises: When should you “un-friend” someone? In the olden days, when friends were really friends, friendships did end – over arguments, changing schools, moving to a different city, or simply no longer having things in common. But as someone recently wondered on Facebook, when’s it time to cut cyber-ties with someone that doesn’t act friendly?

He asked: “So do you un-friend somebody who repeatedly speaks harshly to and about your religion or do you just ignore them and keep them so that they can see your posts?”

Good question. In times past, we engaged in face-to-face discussions, debates or arguments. Now, cloaked in the guise of online anonymity, people can criticize whatever you post, be downright mean if they choose. Hence the dilemma: To “friend” or not to “friend”?

Overall I enjoy social media and appreciate its benefits. I’ve been able to reconnect with old friends from years ago, and get acquainted (as much as social media allows) with people I'd never have encountered otherwise. But in many cases, calling them friends is a stretch.

Which leads to another question: What is a friend, in the truest sense? We all have opinions about that. We can have golf or tennis buddies, a friend that does our taxes, someone we chat with at the sports bar while watching the game, or friends we see only at church. But to me, being a friend requires more.

I like what the Bible says about friendship. For example: “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity” (Proverbs 17:17). If your “friend” is there when times are good, but flees at the first hint of hardship, you might be justified in questioning the quality of the friendship.

Proverbs 18:24 asserts, “A man of many companions may come to ruin; but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” A friend is someone that’s there no matter what – loyal, dependable, faithful.

But perhaps the greatest definition of friendship, in my view, is what Jesus said: “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends” (John 15:13). War sometimes fosters such friendship. Occasionally we hear of someone putting their life on the line for loved ones. Jesus himself provided the ultimate example.

Such friendship demands a lot more than quick posts on a social media site, tweets or spontaneous texts. It’s the kind of friendship most of us would like to have. And the kind of friendship we’d like to demonstrate, if circumstances warranted.

The REAL Root of All Evil

There’s a common misconception the Bible teaches money is the root of all evil. What the passage (1 Timothy 6:10) actually says is, “For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil.” There’s a big difference.

Throughout history money – the love of it, that is – has served as stimulus for many forms of evil: Greed, envy, jealousy, unethical behavior, arrogance, murder, robbery, burglary, muggings, bribery, extortion, and many others we could name.

But if there’s a singular root of evil, it’s not money. It’s pride. If you look at the list above, you’ll note in one way or another, each form of evil is a manifestation of unhealthy pride, unrestrained emphasis on self and self-interest at the expense of others.

This isn’t to be confused, of course, with proper expressions of pride – like satisfaction with a job well done, or being pleased with the accomplishments of a loved one. But pride presents its sinful side when “I” and “me” become paramount.

We see pride manifested in competitions for “biggest” and “tallest,” for instance. The Council for Tall Buildings and Urban Habitat (did you know there was such a council?) reported developers of new super-skyscrapers all over the globe are installing huge, useless needles atop their buildings in a quest to market their structures as the world’s tallest. The still unfinished One World Trade Center in Manhattan and Dubai’s Burj Al Arab are just two examples.

At this time of year, football fans across the country are caught in “We’re No. 1!” hysteria. For some reason, when our favorite team excels, it’s our chests that get puffed up.

Even some churches display pride in its worst forms – practicing one-upmanship with the size of worship facilities, flaunting statistics about membership and baptisms, even seeming downright self-righteous about “correct” doctrine, traditions and teachings.

This is hardly new, however. If you believe in the biblical story about what theologians call the “original sin” and “the fall of man,” it seems the first sin was not disobedience by eating the forbidden fruit, but Adam and Eve’s being suckered in by a prideful appeal.

In Genesis 3:1-7, the serpent (Satan) approaches the first couple and asks, “Did God really say, ‘You must not eat from any tree in the garden’?” Eve replies they were told to avoid only one tree, explaining God had said, “you must not touch it, or you will die.” Then the serpent responds, “You will not surely die…. For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.”

At that moment pride, in all its insidiousness, reared up. The passage doesn’t record this, but I can imagine Adam and Eve eyeing each other and saying, “Hey, that’s right! Who does God think He is, anyway? Who is He to tell us what to do?” The rest, as they say, is history.

In his classic book, Mere Christianity, C.S. Lewis wrote, “There is one vice of which no man in the world is free; which every one in the world loathes when he sees it in someone else; and of which hardly any people…ever imagine that they are guilty themselves…. There is no fault which makes a man more unpopular, and no fault which we are more unconscious of in ourselves…. The vice I am talking of is Pride or Self-Conceit; and the virtue opposite to it, in Christian morals, is called Humility.”

The world around us tells us pride is okay, even commendable. “Look out for yourself,” the mantra advises. Baby Boomers (I’m a card-carrying member) have been called the “Me Generation,” describing our zeal for “self-realization” and “self-fulfillment.” But for those of us who have become followers of Christ, such attitudes pose a contradiction. If we take a deep, honest look at Jesus, pride should be instantly dispelled. His life – and death – personified humility.

Jesus had every reason to burst with pride, to “lord it over” everyone around him. But instead, God incarnate became humble. Philippians 2:8 states, “And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death, even death on a cross.” He calls His followers to die to self as well.

The Old Testament records what God said about pride: “Let not the wise man boast of his wisdom or the strong man boast of his strength or the rich man boast of his riches, but let him who boasts boast about this: that he understands and knows me, that I am the Lord, who exercises kindness, justice and righteousness on earth, for in these I delight” (Jeremiah 9:23-24).

God says, “If you want to be proud – be proud about that!”

Truth About ‘Overnight Success’

The beautifully painted ceiling is a jaw-dropping feature of this palace in Wurzburg, Germany, the result of many years of proud and diligent craftsmanship.

Have you ever met a true overnight success? Someone who was an absolute nobody doing absolutely nothing one day, then the talk of the town – in a good way – the next? I haven’t. The transition from “who’s he” to “Who’s Who” can happen overnight, but in reality the process of reaching that point takes years.

Unfortunately, it seems many people don’t understand that. I had a friend who used to say, “I love work – I can spend all day watching other people do it!” That’s the perspective some folks share these days: “I want success, and everything that comes with it – but not if I have to work for it.”

We hear talk about how we’ve “evolved” as a society. We’ve definitely made strides in some areas, including race relations, gender equality, and appreciation for different cultures. But in other areas, I’m afraid we’ve “de-volved.”

Work ethic, for instance. German sociologist Max Weber coined the term “Protestant work ethic” in the early 1900s. However, for many centuries the virtues of hard work, frugality and diligence have been central to the Christian faith, as well as some other belief systems. Working well and working hard can reflect one’s desire to honor God and serve others, part of our human calling.

But one needn’t be Protestant – or even a person of faith – to find worth in hard work. Inventor Thomas Edison stated, “Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” And poet Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote, “Without ambition one starts nothing; without work one finishes nothing. The prize will not be sent to you. You have to win it.”

In today’s fast-food, microwave, “gotta have it now” world, fewer and fewer people seem willing to expend the effort necessary to succeed. They ask for silver platters, expecting to have everything handed to them. Where’s the fun, the fulfillment in that?

Writer and speaker Bill Hendricks reminded me of this when he observed: “Success is not an Egg McMuffin, delivered to us for a $3, three-minute investment. No, success is the Sistine Chapel – it takes years, pain, frustration, thousands of brushes, colors and crumpled up sketches before you have your masterpiece.”

My late uncle, Joe Tamasy, stands beside
an exquisite work of porcelain in Herend,
Hungary featuring the image of the
Hungarian Parliament.

Years ago during my first trip to Europe I marveled at glorious, exquisitely conceived and painstakingly created cathedrals, houses of government and palaces in Hungary, Austria and Germany. These structures all were centuries old, their longevity attributable to the many years required to construct them. Because they weren’t erected hastily and haphazardly, they stand today as living memorials to the blood, sweat and tears spilled to bring them to reality.

The pace of life today, of course, is faster. We feel pulled in multiple directions. As a result, many of us seek maximum returns with minimum investments. We find “get rich quick” enticing. We want “overnight success,” whether at work or at home, in our relationships or personal pursuits. If it requires time, initiative and energy, forget it.

This is sad, because much of the joy is in the journey, not just the destination. Having a dream, formulating plans and goals for realizing it, then investing whatever it takes to achieve it – that’s where you can find the joy.

Whether it’s the virtuoso musician, accomplished innovator, gifted speaker, acclaimed surgeon, or master craftsman, none of them achieved success overnight in their fields of endeavor. It took many years of study, practice, honing of skills, trial and error, risk taking and sacrifice making.

Maybe that’s why some young celebrities find notoriety quickly eclipsing their fame. Thrust into the spotlight too early, still green as performers, they don’t appreciate what it takes not only to attain success – but also to sustain it over the long term.

My favorite book, the Bible, speaks a lot about hard work and personal enterprise. The book of Proverbs itself serves as an excellent primer on the topic.

For example, “The sluggard craves and gets nothing, but the desires of the diligent are fully satisfied” (Proverbs 13:4). It also warns against all talk and no action: “All hard work brings a profit, but mere talk leads only to poverty” (Proverbs 14:23).

Another passage paints a vivid picture: “I went past the field of the sluggard, past the vineyard of the man who lacks judgment; thorns had come up everywhere, the ground was covered with weeds, and the stone wall was in ruins. I applied my heart to what I observed and learned a lesson from what I saw: A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest – and poverty will come on you like a bandit and scarcity like an armed man” (Proverbs 24:30-34).

We’re living in an age of “entitlement,” when some segments of society view the poor and disadvantaged with pity, convinced their problems can be solved with handouts. What they really need, however, is a hand up – being offered the education, training and practical skills necessary for succeeding in the workplace.

At the same time, we need to re-embrace the virtues of hard work, the belief that determination, commitment and initiative will reap rewards as we persevere toward hopes and aspirations. It may take years, but if willing to work hard, anyone is entitled to become an “overnight success.

Would You Want to Live to Be 120?

If you could, would you choose living to 120 to delay walking into the sunset?

A headline in the morning newspaper caught my eye (yes, vintage newspaper editor that I am, I still read bonafide, hold-in-your-hands newspapers). It read, “Would you want to live to be 120?”

This was the third time recently I’d read about scientists predicting that by year 2050, average Americans will live to 120. Wow! Today, we still recognize people that live to be 100. Imagine in another 40 years or so, when 100 would be “middle-aged”!

According to this particular piece, one person to date has lived to be 122, a woman who died in 1997. I once knew someone claiming to be 122, but he really was only 61. His life had been such a struggle, it just seemed like he’d lived twice as long.

The article predicted greatly increased human longevity could be achieved through “radical life extension,” a combination of science, technology and theory of living, to push the limits of the human lifespan. Sound good to you?

Right now, this question – would you want to live to be 120? – seems the stuff of fantasy for most of us, but it’s still valid to consider. If you could, would you want to live that long?

Before giving my own answer (should you even care), let’s consider a few things. For instance, if the point of living is to postpone death as long as possible, then many people probably would say yes. As someone has said, “No one gets out of this life alive,” so if you can delay the inevitable, why not, right?

Then again, we’d have to assume that current maladies like Alzheimer’s disease and dementia, severe arthritis, diabetes and other diseases that wither body, mind and spirit would have to be overcome. Spending 40 or more years in a care facility with less than full mental faculties and being totally dependent on someone else for routine tasks like eating and changing clothes doesn’t sound like a lot of fun.

Now that I’ve arrived at Medicare age, I already have joints that are prone to get sore, and aches and pains I didn’t experience even 10 years ago. How would I feel 50 or 60 years from now? Would I have to become a bionic man, with every part replaced or refurbished just to get through a normal day?

At present, still being of sound mind (some might disagree!) and feeling like I’m still making a positive contribution to society (some people that have read this blog might really disagree!), life’s good. But 10, 20 or more years from now – who knows?

If people lived longer, their working lives might be extended as well – perhaps to age 80 or 90. Today’s ideal of retiring at 65 would become obsolete. That certainly could ease the Social Security crisis. But how would it affect things like life insurance policies and premiums, or senior citizen discounts?

A study conducted by the Pew Research Center’s Religion & Public Life Project determined nearly 70 percent of adults questioned would like to reach ages between 79 and 100. Almost all of them, I’ve heard, agreed with Woody Allen, who once said, “I’m not afraid of dying. I just don’t want to be there when it happens.”

But once again: Would you want to live to be 120? My answer? No. Definitely not.

Pondering our last days on earth 
need not be approached with fear.

Not only because I wouldn’t want to exist as an addled, helpless senior-senior citizen. Even if I could enjoy reasonably good health and a clear mind, I wouldn’t want to live that long. Why? Because I’m convinced this life is not the destination – it’s only a brief sojourn, kind of preparation for the main event.

That’s not to say I’m planning to depart soon, but if that were to be the case, I believe I’d be ready. I faced that possibility seven years ago before my open-heart surgery. By the day of my operation, I felt ready to stay or go – whichever God decided.

Pondering this reminds me of Titus 2:13, which states, “while we wait for the blessed hope – the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ.” This “blessed hope” – what’s that all about? I’m looking forward to finding out.

And 1 Corinthians 2:9 declares, “No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived, what God has prepared for those that love him.” Why doesn’t this passage give more specifics on what we can expect? I think it’s because the finite, time-oriented human mind can’t begin to comprehend the infinite and eternal. Just because we can’t understand it, that doesn’t mean it’s not there.

So even if given the opportunity, I really wouldn’t choose to live to be 120. If the life to come is as great as advertised, I don’t want to wait another 55 years to check it out!

Life on 30-Minute – or 30-Day – Delay?

Someone once suggested a test to determine whether I’m a procrastinator, but I never got around to taking it. As someone has wisely said, why do today what you can put off until tomorrow, right?

Actually, procrastinator sounds like something you should get paid for, so I suspect most of us are really amateur-crastinators. But that doesn’t mean we’re not good at it.

Procrastination is practically required to write professionally. Without much effort, we can dream up a limitless variety of excuses for not diving into the demanding, all-consuming task of writing: Getting just one more cup of coffee. Emptying the dishwasher (if you have a home office). Reading the morning newspaper, or visiting favorite websites. Calling a friend you haven’t talked with in months. Changing a light bulb. The list goes on.

Author Philip Yancey summed up the writer’s perspective: “I hate to write…but I love to have written!” I can relate – been there, done that.

But procrastination isn’t exclusive to wordsmiths. Everyone does it: Putting off paying the bills; delaying necessary home repairs; not sending that letter or making that phone call; choosing an hour of TV over finishing a class assignment. In fact, I thought about writing this post some time ago – I’m just now getting around to it.

Live broadcasts on TV and radio usually have five to seven-second delays to avoid objectionable material. Sometimes it seems we operate our lives on a 30-minute, or even 30-day delay. “I’ll do it – in just a few minutes!” Anything to avoid the inevitable.

Sometimes procrastination is justified – trying to forestall the unpleasant or undesirable as long as possible. But often procrastination is just a sophisticated synonym for laziness. And laziness can be costly, in more ways than one.

Proverbs 10:5 observes, “He who gathers crops in summer is a wise son, but he who sleeps during harvest is a disgraceful son.” Whether as part of a family or a staff at work, we’re usually members of a team. And the team’s success depends on contributions of every member. When we procrastinate, not doing our part, everyone suffers.

The road to failure is often paved with good intentions. Procrastination can consist of an abundance of talking about what we intend to do, accompanied by grandiose dreams about our desired outcome. But mere talk without action can sound the death knell for our plans. As Proverbs 14:23 states, “All hard work brings a profit, but mere talk leads only to poverty.”

Procrastination can also squander unique, once-in-a-lifetime opportunities that come our way. We might receive multiple chances to pursue our hopes and dreams, but sometimes opportunity knocks but once. If we’re not prompt in answering the door, it might depart, never to return. As Proverbs 24:33-34 warns, “A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest – and poverty will come to you like a bandit and scarcity like an armed man.”

With that in mind, could procrastination be considered a crime? Businessman Victor Kiam said, “Procrastination is opportunity’s assassin.” And British poet Edward Young offered this view: “Procrastination is the thief of time.” If accused of procrastinating, could a jury of your peers convict you?

To be fair, there’s also a positive side to procrastination. It’s not always a bad thing, as writer Hilary Mantel has suggested: “Imagination only comes when you privilege the subconscious, when you make delay and procrastination work for you.” So, how can we discern between procrastination that’s bordering on the criminal, sapping our productivity, and procrastination that’s useful, preparing and positioning us for greater achievements in the future?

I’ll have to get back to you on that. Need to think about it. But I’ll let you know, real soon. I promise. 

When ‘Want To’ Becomes ‘Have To!’

Have you ever wanted to do something – perhaps take lessons on a musical instrument, try a new hobby, travel somewhere you’ve always wanted to see? How about making a major life change, such as leaving a job where you feel stuck, going back to get a college degree, or starting a new career?

Most of us have, probably more than once. Unfortunately, our “want to” wasn’t strong enough to become “have to.” We spent time wishing things were different, but not doing much about it.

That’s why I’m so excited about the new book my friend, Gary Highfield, has written. In fact, When ‘Want To’ Becomes ‘Have To!’ is a book that you – and someone you know – need to read.

In When 'Want To' Becomes 'Have To!'
Gary Highfield tells an unforgettable story.

Enduring a very difficult childhood, encountering nearly every form of adversity a young person could face, Gary had lots of “want to.” Many times he imagined his life being different. I won’t give the details – that would spoil your enjoyment of his amazing story. But one day his “want to” turned into “have to.” Gary realized there was no point in waiting for someone to change his situation and provide the better life he desired for his family. He had to take steps to initiate the changes.

Not that he wasn’t already trying. Gary had a dead-end, hourly wage job doing manual labor. He also worked odd jobs to earn a few extra dollars. But he still couldn’t afford to occasionally take his family of five to an inexpensive restaurant. What he needed was not to work harder or longer, but to work smarter – and develop talents and abilities God had given him.

Three apparent setbacks turned into proverbial blessings in disguise, escalating Gary’s quest for a better life: being turned down for food stamps; being refused a $1 an hour raise at work; and being terminated from his first sales job – ironically, because he did it too well. Refusing to accept failure as a final verdict, Gary ratcheted up his determination, practically begging for a probationary sales job with a cellular phone company in the industry’s early years.

Applying principles and strategies he’d learned by reading inspirational and self-help books, listening to motivational tapes, receiving timely, providential help from friends and strangers, and pushing himself outside his own comfort zone, Gary became his company’s top salesman. Throughout his life, people had told him, “You can’t do that,” but he ignored them. As Gary says today, “Impossible is only possible if you quit.”

Writing a book is one of his “impossibilities.” He and I met more than a year ago through a mutual friend. Gary had compiled a very rough draft for a book, telling his story and sharing many of the insights he’d gained through years of struggle, resolve and finally, success. But he recognized he wasn’t a writer. That’s where I came in. Over the next 12 months I served as his editor, helping shape and refine his content into a book we both believe can make a profound difference in many people’s lives.

When you read When ‘Want To’ Becomes ‘Have To!’ you’ll discover Gary’s moving, sometimes heart-wrenching, sometimes funny account of grit, gumption, guile and most of all, God’s grace.

As we worked together on the book, several Bible passages came to mind. “If anyone will not work, neither let him eat,” 2 Thessalonians 3:10 declares. (This verse, curiously enough, was adapted into the Communist Manifesto by Karl Marx.) Gary was more than willing to work, and work hard. He just needed to learn how to work better.

Proverbs 21:5 states, “The plans of the diligent lead to profit as surely as haste leads to poverty.” Gary didn’t become an overnight success, not by any imaginative stretch. He set goals, met with people to learn from them, embraced a vision and pursued it. He planned his work and worked his plan, lifting his family from the shadow of poverty.

His unique life and career journey could be summarized by Proverbs 3:5-6: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.” He did what he believed was right, even when the outcome wasn't clear. Sometimes his wife, Kimberly, wondered about what he was doing. But keeping one eye on God and one eye on the plow, Gary was able to achieve the fulfilling life of his dreams.

So I highly recommend this book, not because I had anything to do with it, but because it’s a book whose time has come. In an age of so-called “entitlements,” and justified hand-wringing over how to help people in need, Gary’s authored a book that’s both personal and practical, filled with principles and truths worthwhile for people in all circumstances. As the subtitle suggests, it’s a guide for “breaking the chains that are holding you back.” 

Answering the Tough Questions

The meaning and purpose of toadstools - who knows?

When I get to heaven, after probably about 1,000 years of awe, adoration and worship upon finally seeing God face to face, if there’s a Q&A session of some kind, I might ask something like this: “Lord, with all due respect, when You created mosquitoes and toadstools, could You share exactly what you had in mind?”

In reality, once we leave this life, questions like that probably will be moot. At that point, who cares, right?

But aren’t there other questions – tough, serious questions – we’d all like to ask, at least sometimes? Questions that seem to defy answers, ones about things in life that just don’t seem to make sense?

Years ago, author Philip Yancey made his initial splash in the world of spiritual literature when he wrote Where Is God When It Hurts? That book remains a classic today as people continue to wrestle with the problem of pain and hardship, and why God sometimes seems unhearing or disinterested.

Proving how enduring that dilemma remains, decades after his initial book, Yancey has written a follow-up volume, The Question That Never Goes Away, now being released. He wrote this on the heels of the school massacre in Newtown, Conn., when the deaths of so many dear children made absolutely no sense.

Some questions never go away.

Of course, Yancey was not the first to recognize this troublesome and persistent question. One-time atheist turned Christian apologist C.S. Lewis, who watched his dear wife, Joy Gresham, die of cancer, wrote books like A Grief Observed and The Problem of Pain to wrestle with this issue. And many others that have attempted to offer perspectives on this unpleasant conundrum.

I’ve always said that I wouldn’t mind pain if it didn’t hurt so much. But it does – and we’d like to do away with it. We have industries devoted to the elimination or at least minimizing of pain. But it doesn’t go away. And why doesn’t God do something about it?

We experience pain ourselves when disease strikes, spouses leave, children stray, natural calamities cause massive destruction, relationships fail, accidents claim loved ones, hopes die. And we share pain when people we love encounter similar struggles. Where is God?

I’ll not pretend to have the answers. With so many books written about the topic, how could solutions be presented in a brief column? But one thing I’m certain of – God knows the answers, and He’s neither absent nor indifferent. And as the apostle Paul wrote in 2 Corinthians 12:9-10, “But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”

We don’t like weakness. We like being strong, feeling in control. But I’ve found the weak, uncontrollable moments are when we can see God most clearly, when we discover in fact that His grace is sufficient and, as He has promised, “I will never leave you nor forsake you” (Joshua 1:5 and Hebrews 13:5). This promise was repeated in both the Old and New testaments, perhaps God’s way of saying, “If you missed it the first time, I’ll give it to you again.”

I’ve often found comfort in the assurance God gave through the prophet Jeremiah, “’For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a future and a hope’” (Jeremiah 29:11). That’s exactly what we need, when the present looks so bleak and hopeless.

Where is God when it hurts? What was He doing when tragedy occurred? These are questions that can be answered only through the eyes of faith.

The Books We Read and the People We Meet

Motivational speaker Charlie “Tremendous” Jones often commented, “Five years from now, you’ll be the same except for the books you read and the people you meet.”

Obviously, other factors can influence our lives, but there’s a lot of truth to Jones’s statement. Being an avid reader, I’ve been dramatically affected by many books I’ve read and the authors who wrote them. If you’ve seen many of my posts, you know the Bible has been the single most influential book in my life. But there have been many others as well.

Books can take us to new worlds
and transport us to different times.

I remember reading classic books like Treasure Island, Journey to the Center of the Earth, Hans Brinker and A Tale of Two Cities that whisked me to other lands and other times. As an adult I spent some time experiencing the horrifying worlds of Stephen King, and novels by John Grisham made life with lawyers and judges seem exciting. Uplifting works by the likes of Philip Yancey, Walter Wangerin, Oswald Chambers, C.S. Lewis, Charles Swindoll and others informed and challenged my understanding of God and true spirituality.

It’s sad that reading has become a second-rate pastime for many people, because every book I’ve read gave me something to think about and in one way or another, made me a bit richer person.

The people I’ve met have had an even more profound impact on my life. I’ve already written about teachers and college professors. But employers, work colleagues, friends and family members have had an impact on me no words could ever fully express.

People we encounter from day
to day enrich our lives.

As a journalist it’s been my privilege to interview numerous well-known people, many worth knowing – and some that weren’t. Hours I spent with individuals like Jesse Owens, U.S. Senate Chaplain Richard Halverson, Charles Colson, Archie Griffin and others left strong, positive impressions. I’ll never forget the words of Joni Eareckson Tada – a speaker, author, artist and singer who became incredibly accomplished despite becoming a quadriplegic as a teenager. She told me, “I shudder to think what my life would have been like if I had not become paralyzed.” Wow!

But it’s the “everyday people” who’ve come into my life, sometimes just briefly, that have had the greatest impact of all. A kind word here, a wise rebuke there, a casual comment that echoed long after they had departed. Voices of experience and insight, counsel from people who’ve “been there, done that” to help me in working through various problems and decisions.

The apostle Paul apparently also understood the importance of books we read and people we meet. Writing to his disciple, Timothy, he said, “When you come, bring the cloak that I left with Carpus at Troas, and my scrolls, especially the parchments (the equivalent of books at the time)” (2 Timothy 4:13).

Earlier in the same book, Paul vividly described the multi-generational impact people can have: “And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable men who will be qualified to teach others” (2 Timothy 2:2). When Jesus instructed His followers, “Go therefore and make disciples of all nations” (Matthew 28:19), He was already envisioning the countless millions through the centuries that one day would commit their lives to Him by faith.

So I ask you: What are the challenging, thought-provoking books you’re reading? And who are the people you’re encountering from day to day, individuals that are having a meaningful impact on your life? Five years from now, as Charlie Jones said, you’ll be a different person because of them. Especially if one of those books is the Bible.

Here’s to Teachers, the Maestros of Learning!

It seems appropriate that this post falls on Labor Day, because it’s about teachers – in my view, one of the most important and noble professions of all. More than work, it’s a calling.

The new school year is either underway or, depending on where you live, about to start. In either case, young minds are gearing up for another year of learning. There’s an ongoing debate about whether teachers should concentrate on imparting information and knowledge necessary for their students to excel on standardized tests. I don’t think so.

I understand the value of formalized testing to gauge an overall student population’s grasp of content within particular fields of study. But preparing students to produce the right answers on standardized tests isn’t the only measure of effective teaching. In fact, they may have succeeded in accumulating information without truly learning much at all.

Teachers can impart vision, passion
and the joy of learning.

As I reflect on my own educational career, I’m reminded about how influential certain teachers were in my life and how pivotal their skills – and wise comments – were in shaping my career. There was my fourth grade teacher who told my mother I was “college material,” implanting an educational vision in the mind of a young boy from a family where no one had ever attended college.

Then there was my freshman English instructor in college who identified my writing potential and encouraged me in various ways to pursue the craft. And there was the journalism professor in my first news reporting class that taught not only the methodology, but also the joy of taking on challenging interviews or news events and writing in ways that capture the reader’s attention.

Sadly, the value and potential impact of skilled and dedicated teachers is often overlooked or underestimated by society. And it’s equally sad not all teachers recognize what a special stewardship role they’ve been given in shaping young minds and motivating young thinkers.

In reality, a teacher can have as much – or more – impact on the life of a young person than some parents, especially for those that get to spend little time with their parents. Such an opportunity, and responsibility, should be regarded with awe, fear and trembling. But also with honor and pride.

The notion that teaching is only providing academic material, to be regurgitated on an exam or standardized testing instrument, is a travesty. Information and knowledge are part of it, without question, but the best teachers communicate a passion, a contagious love for their subjects that can infect their students.

I like what the Bible says about teaching – and the role of teachers. For instance, in 2 Timothy 2:2 the apostle Paul wrote to his “student,” Timothy, “And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable men who will be qualified to teach others.” While Paul was writing about spiritual truth – eternal verities – the principle applies regardless of the type of teaching.

Elsewhere the apostle wrote, “Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me – put it into practice…” (Philippians 4:8). He understood the importance of not only imparting knowledge and truth, but also serving as a good example, modeling what he was teaching. Modern-day teachers aspiring to have a long-lasting, positive impact on their students would be wise to take that to heart.

But this doesn’t take parents off the hook. Ideally, parents regard seriously their God-given responsibility to teach their children in every way, not only through verbal instruction but also by demonstrating the way to live successfully through their own lives. As Deuteronomy 6:6-7 states, “These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress these on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.”

In other words, “teachable moments” are all around us, every minute of the day, whether we’re parents raising our children or professional teachers, instructors and professors. Teaching, whatever the setting, is truly an important, noble calling. One we should never take lightly.