Overcoming the Enemies of Contentment

Suppose you were hired for a job and told the company had established 10 rules that had to be abided by without exceptions. Would you accept the job?

 

As long as the rules were reasonable, most of us would. Unless the rules were something like being required to work 100 hours a week, not being allowed to take any breaks or eat lunch, or doing something illegal. Virtually every job comes with certain rules. Some require wearing of uniforms or a specific dress code. Employers rightfully expect employees to arrive for work on time, and often give them detailed job descriptions. Without rules there would be chaos.

 

For many years it was not uncommon to find the Ten Commandments displayed at workplaces. We can still see them in some of the federal buildings in Washington, D.C., as well as government buildings in some states. But as someone has quipped, having the Ten Commandments in plain sight can create a hostile working environment for some folks.

 

Actually, the commandments are fairly straight-forward, as presented in Exodus 20 and Deuteronomy 5. The first four deal with one’s relationship with God: Have no other gods but the Lord; don’t worship idols; don’t take God’s name in vain; keep the Sabbath as a day of rest.

 

The other six concern relationships with one another: Give honor and respect for one’s parents; don’t commit murder; don’t commit adultery; don’t steal things that aren’t yours; always tell the truth; and don’t covet other people’s stuff. Nothing in that list seems unreasonable, does it? But try as we might, we break one or more of those commands every day in thought, word and/or deed.

 

Each commandment is worthy of exposition to explore why God saw fit to include it in the “Top 10” list. But perhaps the one we hear about the least is the last, which says:

“You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife. You shall not set your desire on your neighbor’s house or land, his manservant or maidservant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor” (Deuteronomy 5:21).

 

It’s not much of a mystery why the Lord inserted this one among the Ten Commandments. It’s hard to establish a healthy, trusting relationship with others when you are intensely coveting – or desiring – the things they possess. But the practice of “comparing ourselves with the Joneses” is something most of us have engaged in probably more than once.

 

Maybe a neighbor always seems to be driving a new car loaded with all the accessories. Their home might be the envy of everyone on the street. Photos they regularly post on social media about their latest exotic trip might cause us to wonder why we don’t get to travel as they do. Or they might have the seemingly picture-perfect marriage, their kids are the most mannerly, and they attend the very best schools. What’s wrong with coveting things like that?

 

There are many reasons, but perhaps foremost is that coveting is the enemy of a trait that should be evident in our lives if we are followers of Jesus Christ: Contentment. Writing to his young protégé, Timothy, the apostle Paul declared, “godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it” (1 Timothy 6:6-7).

 

What kind of witness for Christ can we be if we’re obviously jealous or envious of other people’s lives and what they have?

 

Of course, we live in a society that bombards us with messages discouraging contentment, saying what we have isn’t enough, that no matter how much we have we need more. This flies against biblical teachings that God is the one who provides us with what we need. As Paul wrote in another letter, “And my God will meet all your needs according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:19).

 

To covet what someone else has that we don’t is like complaining to the Lord that He hasn’t been good enough or kind enough to us, that if He really loved us He’d give us more.

 

Jesus warned against such thinking. He said, “…do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear…. For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. But seek His kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well” (Luke 12:22,30-31).

 

What about people who aren’t committed to following Christ? They might clearly be living contrary to God’s design, and yet they’re prospering, seemingly happy as they could be. What’s up with that? 

 

King David of Israel, who experienced more than his share of opposition and adversity during his lifetime, apparently wondered about this as well. His conclusion: “Do not fret because of evil men or be envious of those who do wrong; for like grass they will soon wither, like green plants they will soon die away” (Psalm 37:1).

Surrounded by enemies of contentment, we’d be wise to take to heart Paul’s advice to Timothy: “But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that” (1 Timothy 6:8). 

‘I Now Pronounce You Debt and Debtor’

Marriage is hard. Anyone who says differently has never tried it. Merging two people from different families and backgrounds, motivations and values, personalities and expectations. Two becoming one, as God prescribed in Genesis 2:24, is easier said than done.

Debt is a terrible, unmerciful master.

When one or both parties show up at the altar weighed down by a pile of debt, the challenge becomes even harder. Almost as difficult as trying to climb Mount Everest wearing only a swimsuit and flip-flops. Experts say money problems are a major contributor to divorce.

My wife and I recently celebrated 45 years of marriage. It’s been a wonderful journey of life together, but recalling the financial mountain we confronted early on makes me shudder. Somehow, we survived.

During my early single adult years, whenever I needed an emotional pick-me-up, the solution was to buy myself something. “Even if no one else cares about me, I love me!” was my self-indulgent rationale. It never occurred to me that the items I “bought” – even on sale –  figuring I could afford the monthly minimum payments, would cost me several times that amount in accrued interest. When we married, my wife “inherited” this debt.

Thankfully, we were introduced to biblical financial principles. Applying them was the start of escaping financial bondage. As Proverbs 22:7 asserts, “The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is slave to the lender.” The term “slave” is appropriate, because one deep in debt has no financial freedom. Mounting bills govern decisions; anxiety of indebtedness is ever-present. “I owe, I owe, it’s off the work I go!”

Introduced to wisdom from financial planners like Larry Burkett and Ron Blue, my wife and I discovered the Bible’s practical truths about finances every couple should learn before exchanging “I do’s.” Maybe you know someone about to walk down the aisle – or maybe you’re contemplating doing that soon yourself. Here are some of the sound principles we have learned:

Spend less than you earn. It’s said, “Expenditures always rise to level of income.” This is true of people working at minimum wage, as well as individuals receiving huge salaries. Whether you’re a corporate CEO, professional athlete, Hollywood celebrity or coffee shop barista, tomorrow’s wages aren’t guaranteed. “Better a little with the fear of the Lord than great wealth with turmoil” (Proverbs 15:16).

Avoid debt. Another translation of Proverbs 22:7 says the borrower is “servant” to the lender. This isn’t idyllic serving like the congenial staff of Downton Abbey; it’s grinding, unrelenting servitude, impeding our ability to make independent financial decisions. Handling money shouldn’t be an unending uphill battle.

Have a savings plan and a fund for emergencies. We should expect unexpected expenses, even though we won’t know where or when they will occur. Planning for the unplanned can help to avoid unnecessary debt. “Go to the ant, you sluggard; consider its ways and be wise! It has no commander or ruler, yet it stores its provisions in summer and gathers its food at harvest” (Proverbs 6:6-8).

Be rich in things focused on God. That new car, or that perfect house? Those are nice, but like all material things, they don’t last. We’re better off focusing on things that last forever. “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also” (Matthew 6:19-21).

Learn to be a generous giver. Jesus said it’s more blessed to give than to receive (Acts 20:35), and that’s true. Because as we give from our resources to help and serve others, it brings joy. There are many biblical passages that speak to this, but as Proverbs 11:25 declares, “A generous man will prosper; he who refreshes others will himself be refreshed.”

Wants are not the same as needs. In our materialistic society, we’re bombarded with messages promoting the latest and greatest gizmos and gadgets. It’s easy to become confused over what we need rather than what we want. In Philippians 4:19, the apostle Paul wrote, “And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.” The Scriptures offer no such promise for our wants or desires. 

God owns it all. This last principle is the most important of all. We tend to regard ourselves as owners of what we have, but from God’s perspective, we’re only stewards of what He entrusts to us. “Yours, O Lord, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the majesty and the splendor, for everything in heaven and earth is yours…. Wealth and honor come from you, you are the ruler of all things. In your hands are strength and power to exalt and give strength to all” (1 Chronicles 29:11-12).

These guidelines are excellent for people of all ages, but especially for those in pursuit of marital bliss.  Without mounting financial pressures making marriage more difficult than necessary, the divorce rate would probably fall dramatically.

What Else Do You Need?

At times it seems the realm of entertainment is devoid of anything vaguely resembling solid, biblical – or even traditional – values. It’s almost as if someone in charge of LaLa Land told everyone, “Whatever the Bible says to do, we need to do the opposite.” Occasionally, however, glimmers of hope emerge.

Even the illumination of a small
spotlight can dispel the gathering
darkness.

One of those recently was a statement by actor-director-comedian Tyler Perry, whose “Madea” comedic films have drawn millions to the theaters and who, as I understand it, is a man of strong faith. In a quote online, Perry said, “It doesn’t matter if a million people tell you what you can’t do, or if 10 million people tell you, ‘no.’ If you get one ‘yes’ from God, that’s all you need.”

Those are words many of us need to hear, because we live in a world that will either beat us down, killing our aspirations and dimming our vision, or seeking to dictate how we are to think and act. As Perry says, one “yes” from God should be all that we need.

Peer pressure is a reality of the human condition we all encounter. It can be bad, seeking to force us into doing or believing what we deep-down know is wrong. Or it can be good when we’re surrounded by those who uphold strong, positive values and encourage us to do the same. But even when we lack helpful support, we can recognize, one “yes” from God is all we need.

One of my favorite verses is Philippians 4:13, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” This statement came from the apostle Paul who, following his conversion, encountered one obstacle after another, challenges that would put the faith of most of us to the test. He surely had more than his share of detractors, but Paul learned time and again that the Lord indeed would equip him to do everything he was being called to do.

This doesn’t mean we can do anything we have a mind to do. Even if I wanted to do so, I’ll never ride the winning horse in the Kentucky Derby. No man will give birth to a baby. And no woman will ever jump from the Eiffel Tower and fly unaided, regardless of how much thrilling it might be to attempt.

But whatever the Lord calls us to do, He promises to provide the strength and resources to get the job done. I think of men like William Wilberforce and John Newton, followers of Jesus who dared to resist the prevailing current by opposing slavery and eventually serving as catalysts for its abolition. Joni Eareckson Tada, a well-known and much-accomplished quadriplegic, continues to be a role model for what it means to overcome great adversity and achieve what most observers would have said was unthinkable, including painting, writing and public speaking. Her faith in Christ also has served as her anchor.

We all find ourselves celebrating individuals who overcome circumstances and disabilities of many kinds in setting and then reaching lofty, seemingly impossible goals. Not all, of course, are driven by strong inner faith. But I believe that just as the Scriptures say we are “fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:14), God provides the inner motivation that compels us to unimagined heights.

Another verse tells us how: “And my God will meet all your needs, according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:19). This applies to our basic, everyday needs, but also to whatever we need to carry out those things He uniquely calls us to do.

So if you are being asked to do something that seems far beyond your capabilities, a call the Lord has placed on your heart that won’t go away, disregard the naysayers. If God says yes, that’s all you need.

Praying Doesn’t Help … Or Does It?

Ornate churches stand nearly empty in many parts of the world, but those
who pray faithfully continue both inside and outside of the sanctuary.

Our nation has experienced an unusual series of national calamities, including hurricanes in Texas and Florida, and violence that resulted in many casualties in Las Vegas, New York City, and Sutherland Springs, Texas. In response, many elected officials, pastors, leaders of other ministries, and people on social media encouraged prayer for victims and their loved ones. Skeptics have countered with snide comments, such as “praying doesn’t help anything.”

That, I think we can all agree, is a matter of opinion. Certainly, if one doesn’t believe in God, it would be easy to deny that prayer helps anything. But we could say the same about someone who comments, “Sending good thoughts your way.” Good thoughts? What good is that? Well, at least they’re not sending bad thoughts.

In one sense, I can understand the skepticism. How often have you heard of someone’s plight and said, “I’ll pray for you,” and then gone on with your life and realized you never followed through on the promise to pray? I’ve done that. That’s why I’ve developed a habit of praying right then for the individual, rather than hoping something will jog my memory to do so sometime later.

There’s another side to this question. We pray many times because we know the needs of the individual, or family, or community, are beyond our capacity to meet. We trust in the assurance in Philippians 4:19, “And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.” The Lord promises to provide for what His children need, even though He doesn’t promise to satisfy our “wants.”

Sometimes, however, as we are praying for God to provide, He is expecting us to become part of His gracious provision. The book of James addresses this when it states, “If one of you says to him, ‘Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed,’ but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it? In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead” (James 2:16-17).

So, if we say, “We’ll pray for you,” but fail to consider ways in which we can provide specific, even tangible help in answer to our prayers, we’re failing to muster the full power of prayer. Thankfully, when natural disasters occur, as well as man-caused tragedies, individual believers and congregations are often among the first responders.

Ministries like the Salvation Army and Samaritan’s Purse are on the scene as soon as possible to offer physical, emotional and spiritual assistance. Church groups, and even mercy ministries from various denominations typically are quick to respond as well. They are wonderful examples of putting feet to our prayers.

Even in our own communities, as we hear of various needs – whether it’s a devastating illness, a family fallen on hard times financially, someone seeking employment, or many other possibilities – we find opportunities to both pray and, as God directs, seek to help in meeting those needs.

In response to the comment, “praying doesn’t help anything,” it might be correct if all we do is utter words without backing them up with action. However, prayer does help in many ways. We acknowledge only God can provide some solutions, whether it’s healing someone with a serious, even terminal illness, or a group of people beset by natural disaster halfway around the globe. It can be a means for reaching out to the afflicted, providing much needed spiritual comfort.

And as we pray, God might impress upon our hearts ways in which we can become directly involved, whether it’s making needed repairs to a widow’s home, generously donating to a worthy cause, offering to transport someone to a hospital for medical treatment, volunteering at a soup kitchen, or simply setting aside time to spend with someone needing comfort and perhaps a listening ear.

As the apostle also wrote, “The prayer of a righteous [person] is powerful and effective” (James 5:16). It can be a plea to God, accompanied by a willingness to become one of the ways He chooses to answer that prayer.