Recognizing the Myth of the Greener Grass

Have you ever felt envy toward someone – a friend, a neighbor, a coworker, maybe a member of your church? If you can honestly say you haven’t, I’m envious of you. I suspect we’ve all envied others from time to time. Maybe they seem more successful, their car or home seems nicer than ours, their marriage seems picture-perfect, their kids always seem well-mannered, they take more exciting vacation trips, or many other reasons we can think of.

There’s even an adage that describes this common problem of feeling envious toward others: “The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.” Actually, it might be better stated, the grass always seems greener….” Because more often than not, seems is the key word. Appearances don’t always represent reality.

 

One of the first books I co-authored, with my friend Ken Johnson, was Pursuing Life with a Shepherd’s Heart. Ken shared experiences he and his family had while managing a “hobby farm” in Minnesota. The primary animals on the farm were sheep, and they were curious critters. There was even a time when they got caught in the greener grass trap.

 

One summer had been particularly dry and all the little farm’s pastureland had been used up. Ken, his wife and kids collaborated in building a temporary fence that ran near the side of their house. Once the fencing was completed, they let the sheep into the area to munch on the untouched grass. The family retreated to the house for lunch.

 

Not long afterward, Ken glanced out the window to check on how the sheep were doing. What he saw was all of the sheep lined up along the fence, heads stuck through it and straining to reach the grass on the other side. Ironically, in the process, they were ruining the grass right underneath their hooves.

 

This is a funny story, but it illustrates that fixation on “greener grass” is no laughing matter. J. Allen Petersen actually wrote a book about it, entitled The Myth of the Greener Grass. In his book Petersen focused on how to “affair-proof” a marriage, emphasizing how the temptation to look yearningly outside one’s marriage is flirting with disaster. Marriages often fail because one or both spouses deceive themselves by thinking how much better things would be if they were out of the marriage or married to someone else.

 

God understood this tendency when He gave us the Ten Commandments. The last of His “top 10” was, “You shall not covet your neighbor’s house. You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife…or anything that belongs to your neighbor” (Exodus 20:17). Even though the commandments were given to Moses thousands of years ago, human nature hasn’t changed with the passage of time.

 

Maybe the ‘greener grass’ isn’t someone other than one’s spouse. But as Gilda Radner’s character on Saturday Night Live, Roseanne Roseannadanna, used to say years ago, “It’s always something!” We might feel envious when a colleague receives a promotion and we don’t. We attend a party at someone’s house and find ourselves envying their furniture, giant-screen TV, or beautiful deck overlooking the valley. Or we arrive for Sunday worship after fussing over something in the car and we see the couple that seems to have everything all together. ‘Why can’t we be like them?’

 

This is one reason the Lord gave us the commandment about not coveting what others have. Being envious or jealous accomplishes nothing, it greatly diminishes our appreciation for what we do have, makes us want things that may not be as they appear, and leaves us feeling miserable and discontented.

 

Writing to believers in ancient Philippi, the apostle Paul wasn’t referring to a shiny chariot someone else had or a more stress-free lifestyle. He had more pressing matters to command his attention, including being wrongfully imprisoned. However, after expressing gratitude for people concerned about his well-being, he wrote:

“…I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through [Christ] who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:11-13).

 

That indeed is the secret – trusting in Jesus Christ and being grateful for whatever He sees fit to give us. And not wallowing in self-pity over what He hasn’t chosen to provide. 

 

As another apostle, Peter, wrote, “[God’s] divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and goodness” (2 Peter 1:3). The Lord knows better than we do what we need – and what we don’t. So, if we should find ourselves gazing longingly at the ‘greener grass’ nearby, whatever it is, we need to remember He indeed has given us “everything we need for a godly life” and be content with that.

Living Like There’s No Tomorrow

Decades ago, theologian Francis Schaeffer authored a book that asked, How Should We Then Live? This remains a valid question today, although it would be difficult to reach a consensus on the right answer. But whether we realize it or not, we’re offering our own answers by how we approach each new day.

“Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.” I don’t remember when or where I first heard that, but it’s true – simplistic as it seems. We worry about what will or could happen tomorrow, then before we know it, ‘tomorrow’ has suddenly transformed into today – and there’s a brand-new tomorrow to fret over.

 

Not one of us is guaranteed tomorrow. Regardless of our age, all we’ve got is today. We can choose to dwell on our yesterdays; we can reach for the future like trying to grasp the just-out-of-reach brass ring on a merry-go-round, or we can focus on today and decide how to go about living it. 

 

One way of looking at it would be to, “Live like there’s no tomorrow.” But even that’s up for interpretation. Some would take that as license to indulge in whatever practices and pleasures they please. Like the old advertising slogans, “Grab the gusto” or “You only go around once.” This approach might provide brief excitement and gratification, but thrills fade quickly. Then what?

 

A better approach, I believe, is to recognize each day as a gift from God. We can rejoice at having been given another chance to enjoy His creation, whether it’s billowy clouds in a bright blue sky, vast expanses like the Grand Canyon, a baby’s laugh, or a beautiful field of wildflowers. We can revel in relationships, appreciating cherished family members and friends. And we can strive use and further develop the talents, experiences and passions we’ve cultivated over time.

 

It’s not wrong to dream about what we’d like to do in the future. We can make plans, whether for the weekend, next week, next month or next year. But all we have for certain is today – the next minute, the next hour. We all know people who no longer have that.

 

Recently my high school graduating class held another reunion. I wasn’t able to attend this one but did receive a report afterward and saw photos from the event. Out of our class of 305, about 45 alums were able to participate.

 

It was fun to look at the updated images of old classmates, even if I didn’t recognize many of them. (The passing years have a curious way of changing our looks.) But one photo was sobering. It was of a poster entitled, “In Remembrance,” listing classmates known to be no longer with us. The list contained 94 names – nearly one-third of our class.

 

Most had passed away in recent years, but others had died decades ago, including two who lost their lives in combat while serving in the Vietnam War less than one year after graduating. I still remember having spent time with some of them in class, performing in the high school band, or at school events.

 

I don’t mean to sound morbid. It’s just a tangible reminder of an old Latin saying, “Tempus fugit” – time flies. When we received diplomas marking the end of our high school years, we all felt excitement and wonder, and maybe some nervousness, not knowing what the future held. I doubt many of us understood then that every new day would indeed be a new gift, undeserved but available either to use productively or squander in vain pursuits.

 

The Scriptures provide reminders of this. Writing to believers in the ancient city of Ephesus – yet very applicable for us in the 21^stcentury – the apostle Paul admonished: 

“For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light…and find out what pleases the Lord…. Be very careful, then, how you live – not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil” (Ephesians 5:8-16).

 

This doesn’t suggest time itself is inherently bad. However, time has a disconcerting habit of racing by quickly and we can’t recapture it. We all have different talents; we don’t all have identical material resources. But regardless of affluence, age or social standing, we each have the same amount of time – 24 hours, 1,440 minutes every day. So, we should be about, as another translation expresses it, “redeeming the time.”

 

In James 4:14 we read, “You do not even know what will happen tomorrow! What is your life? You are a mist [a vapor] that appears for a little while and then vanishes.” So, getting back to the question, “How should we then live?”, what are we going to do with the time allotted?

 

Living like there’s no tomorrow isn’t necessarily bad; it can be a very positive thing. Yes, we can have fun or relax at times with no particular goal in mind. But life’s most fulfilling when it’s being invested – lived intentionally, not simply spent. We can best do this by determining to engage in worthwhile endeavors.

 

The apostle Paul put it this way in Galatians 6:10, “Therefore, as we have the opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.” Another apostle, Peter, urged us to live following the example of how Jesus lived, ultimately giving His life for us as the once and for all atonement for sin. His life, without question, was filled with intention. Our response? “Consequently, [the Christ follower] does not live out his remaining time on earth for human passions, but for the will of God” (1 Peter 4:2).

 

When we awaken each morning, perhaps it would be good not only to thank the Lord for another day, but also to ask, “How would You like me to use it?”

Yielding Our Rights Away Isn’t Easy

When I was living in New Jersey, we called them “circles.” Elsewhere they’re called “roundabouts,” little islands of land in the middle of a busy intersection to expedite traffic flow. Instead of four-way stop signs that are too often ignored, at roundabouts drivers are expected to yield to approaching traffic. 

 

The trick is determining who’s got the right-of-way. Even when certain it’s you, it’s wise to proceed with caution in case another driver approaching the roundabout thinks differently. Sometimes it’s necessary to yield even when it’s within your rights to keep going.

 

Before these traffic “merry-go-rounds” were created, yielding was still an important part of driving safely. One of the laws of physics is two objects can’t occupy the same space at the same time. So, in addition to familiar red hexagonal stop signs, red or yellow triangular yield signs were placed strategically. Their purpose – to effectively warn drivers that vehicles might be approaching from another direction and if so, let them go first.

 

On today’s highways it’s obvious yielding isn’t a natural human tendency. Drivers speeding down the roadway are apt to squeeze into any available space rather than yield, even if it gains them only one car length and shaves perhaps three seconds off their arrival time.

 

Roadways aren’t the only places where we might yield to others. Entering a building, for instance, might prompt us to yield to someone who’s arrived at the door the same time. Sometimes it might be an act of kindness to yield in the grocery store line to a customer with only a few items to check out when we have a full cart. Such common courtesies, however, are often disregarded in favor of, ‘I got here first. After me, you’re first.’

 

In the political sphere, representatives sometimes “yield the floor” during a hearing to others who have pertinent contributions for the discussion. (Although in today’s adversarial climate, that’s increasingly rare.) On TV talk shows we see unyielding participants insistent on proving what they have to say is far more important than anyone else’s.

 

The concept of yielding is vital to what the Bible teaches. We live in a world where everyone seems to be demanding their rights. Our Constitution even includes the Bill of Rights, amendments that specify fundamental rights guaranteed by law. But in God’s economy, being a Christ follower often means giving up our rights.

 

Instead of stating we are to yield, however, the Scriptures use another term many people find equally bothersome: Submission – or submitting.

 

Even as children, the concept of submission rankles us. There’s the story about a little boy who refused to sit in his car seat. He didn’t care if it was for his own good or that the law required it. He just wasn’t going to sit down.

 

Finally, the father stopped the car, turned around and insisted that his son sit, or he’d face consequences when they arrived home. Finally, the headstrong little tyke complied. But after his father resumed driving, he muttered, “I’m sitting down on the outside – but I’m standing up in the inside.” He might as well have been wearing a sign, “Will Not Yield.”

 

As we grow older, the circumstances change but our unyielding, submission-averse mindset doesn’t. Whether at work, in our homes, or in everyday activities, we resist being told what to do. We want things on our own terms.

 

A genuine encounter with Jesus Christ has a way of changing that. Especially when we understand even Jesus recognized what it meant to submit; He didn’t go to the cross because He had nothing else to do that day. In the Garden of Gethsemane, the evening before being crucified, Jesus agonizingly prayed, “Now My soul is troubled, and what shall I say, ‘Father, save Me from this hour’? No, it was for this very reason I came to this hour” (John 12:27). He later added, “Not My will, but Your will be done.” There is no greater example of submission.

 

What could have motivated such sacrifice? Love. Jesus died to pay the penalty for our sins, a price we could never even conceive of being able to pay.

 

God might not command us to give our lives for Him, although many have done that rather than renounce their faith. But the Lord does ask us to submit – to yield – in other ways: First of all, to Him, by obeying His commandments and responding to opportunities He sends our way. 

 

Then there’s submission to others, serving them in the name of Christ, even if it means giving up something tangible or offering time and energy in response to a need we can fill. As the apostle Paul exhorted believers in ancient Philippi, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others” (Philippians 2:3-4).

 

There’s also submission to our spouses. This is an especially sensitive subject. Ephesians 5:22 instructs, “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord,” but this strikes some as demeaning. Perhaps the word ‘yield’ would be easier to swallow, since it suggests more a matter of willing deference.

 

It helps to read this teaching in its context. After stating, “For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the Church…,” it offers clarification: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25). How did Jesus love the Church? He gave His life for it – the body of believers – in the most literal sense. The matter of submission – yielding – applies equally to both spouses.

How can we live in such a selfless way when, like the little boy, we’re tempted to be sitting down on the outside while standing up on the inside? Only through the love and power of Christ living in us through His Spirit. We bring the willingness, the desire. The Lord provides the power. As the apostle Paul declared, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13). 

Much of the Time It’s a Matter of Motives

Do you enjoy reading murder mysteries or watching detective shows on TV? There’s always the crime, then the sleuths arrive to examine the crime scene. For the remainder of the show, book, or program they sift through three basic questions: means, opportunity, and motive.

They work to locate or at least identify the weapon used in committing the crime. Then they compose a list of potential suspects, determining who can be connected to the scene at the time when the crime was committed. But sometimes the most complicated element for solving the crime is the motive. Why did he or she do it?

 

The idea is that people don’t commit crimes without having some rationale or motive for doing them. But this is true not only for criminal behavior. It’s a valid consideration even for the good things that people do. 

 

We might do an act of kindness for someone, for instance, to gain their favor. Students have always been known for buttering up their teachers and professors, hopeful of receiving better consideration for their grades. As law enforcement officers would say, “That’s motive.” The same could apply for a husband might brings flowers home to his wife. He might be doing so to atone for something he did that upset her. Or he might be seeking to get her in a good mood when he tells her of his plans to take a fishing trip with his buddies.

 

Sometimes very good things are done to receive public recognition. Years ago, I worked for a Christian ministry and a wealthy donor decided to give a very large contribution to support the work. He didn’t do so anonymously, however. He traveled to the ministry’s headquarters to present the check personally – and to have his photograph taken as he was handing it to the organization’s president. In the newspaper business, we called that the “grip and grin” photo.

 

Our motives can often be revealed – or concealed – with our speech. Who doesn’t appreciate compliments? But we need to be cautious when confronted with unexpected and perhaps unwarranted flattery. The Old Testament of the Bible has much to say about this. For instance, Psalm 12:2 says of the tactics of ungodly people, “Everyone lies to his neighbor; their flattering lips speak with deception.” 

 

Psalm 55:21 offers a stern warning that even seemingly good friends can betray with kind-sounding words: “My companion attacks his friends; he violates his covenant. His speech is smooth as butter, yet war is in his heart; his words are more soothing than oil, yet they are drawn swords.” Evil intentions harbored inwardly may be disguised but ultimately, they will be revealed.

 

Proverbs 26:24-26 provides a vivid description of this, someone who seems to be saying the right things but clearly is being guided by the wrong motives: “A malicious man disguises himself with his lips, but in his heart he harbors deceit. Though his speech is charming, do not believe him, for seven abominations fill his heart. His malice may be concealed by deception, but his wickedness will be exposed in the assembly.” 

 

Motives are of special interest to God. We can do good things; noble things. We can help the poor, talk with people about Jesus Christ, teach a Bible class or lead a small group, contribute financially to worthy causes, serve our congregations in ways that are commendable. We may even receive the accolades of many for our actions. But what concerns the Lord most are our motives – the why of what we’re doing.

 

Two verses from Proverbs make a similar observation, stated a bit differently. “All a man’s ways seem innocent to him, but motives are weighed by the Lord” (Proverbs 16:2). “All a man’s ways seem right to him, but the Lord weighs the heart” (Proverbs 21:2).

 

And Proverbs 17:3 asserts, “The crucible for silver and the furnace for gold, but the Lord tests the heart.” If we’re doing the right things but for the wrong motivations – if our hearts aren’t in the right place – God isn’t pleased.

 

The book of Acts gives a powerful example of someone desiring to do good things but not for the right reasons. A man named Simon was practicing sorcery in Samaria and receiving a lot of attention. However, he discovered Christ’s apostles were performing many wonders he couldn’t even have imagined. He wanted in on the action:

“When Simon saw the Spirit was given at the laying on of the apostles’ hands, he offered them money and said, ‘Give me also this ability so that everyone on whom I lay my hands may receive the Holy Spirit.’ [The apostle] Peter answered: ‘May your money perish with you, because you thought you could buy the gift of God with money! You have no part or share in this ministry, because your heart is not right before God…’” (Acts 8:9-24).

 

We can become overly introspective to a fault, but sometimes it’s good when engaged in doing things that could be described as “Christian work” to ask ourselves, “Why am I doing this? Am I truly doing this for God’s glory – or am I doing it to make myself feel good, or so others will think well of me?” How we answer could be revealing.

Will You Be Able to Pass the Test?

When I was in college, the things I dreaded most were the tests, especially final exams. I remember the great sense of relief I always felt during final exam week when the last big test was over. Take great weight, remove from shoulders!

I eagerly looked forward to graduation. Surely that would be the end of all the tests. Was I wrong! I soon learned life is one test after another. Whether it’s being hired for a job and proving you’re able to do the work, getting married and discovering the challenges of being a spouse, or having children and learning parenting is rewarding but also hard work. It's one test after another.

 

There are the trials and tribulations that come with living in a broken, often unpredictable world. What do you do when there’s too much week left at the end of your pay? How do you respond when you get a health diagnosis and it’s not good, with major surgery in your imminent future? What’s your reaction when you’re driving along, minding your own business, and someone slams into your car?

 

We’ve all encountered these “tests.” And most of the time, you can’t study for them. You just have to deal with them as they come. 

 

But adversity and hardships, the things we typically regard as tests, aren’t necessarily all bad. In retrospect we might actually be thankful for them. It was Soviet dissident Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn who wrote, “Thank you, prison, for having been in my life.” His time in a gulag for people who opposed the communist government proved to be a growing experience for him, both personally and spiritually.

 

The apostle Paul, no stranger to adverse situations, addressed this directly: “…we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope” (Romans 5:3-4). 

Another apostle, James, had arrived at the same conclusion. Writing to Jews scattered around the known world, he urged them to “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything” (James 1: 1-4).

 

Just as lifting weights serves to build physical strength, the “weights” of everyday challenges can serve to build us up spiritually. It all depends on how we respond to them, whether we resolve to persevere even when things become so difficult we’re tempted to quit. 

 

No sane person seeks hard times; we don’t enjoy pain and suffering. But believing that “in all things God words for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose” (Romans 8:28), we can face difficulties with confidence and hope, knowing He’s allowing them for a reason.

 

But have you ever considered that success, prosperity, enjoying seasons of life when everything seems perfect also can serve as times of testing – tests that reveal our character?

 

We see it all the time with people who are in the public eye: politicians, entertainers, star athletes, prominent business leaders, even people who are “famous for being famous.” They’re in the news, grabbing headlines. People fawn over them, telling them how wonderful they are. Is it any surprise that some of them develop huge egos, convinced they’re really something?

 

That shouldn’t be an option for followers of Christ, however. The apostle Paul cautioned, “Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you” (Romans 12:3). In essence, this is saying there’s no room for “divas” in the Lord’s kingdom.  

 

Humility certainly has an attractive quality to it. If someone is accomplished in some area of life, it’s fine to acknowledge that. But flaunting it or overflowing with pride isn’t attractive at all.

 

The Scriptures say how we respond when people speak well of us can become a form of testing. Proverbs 27:21 states this clearly: “The crucible for silver and the furnace for gold, but a man is tested by the praise he receives.” Precious metals like gold and silver are refined under extreme heat, removing the dross and increasing their purity. In a similar way, God can refine us not only through adversity but also through the “heat” of being praised. Do we become puffed up, even insufferable to be around?

 

When I first noticed that verse, I was the editor of a magazine for Christian business and professional people. We had made major changes in the publication, received a number of awards, and readers were responding very favorably. When I traveled or was attending a conference, people would come up to me and say how much they appreciated the magazine and its message about how to live out our faith in the workplace.

 

At first, it was nice to receive such affirmation, but after a while I realized a temptation was lurking. Would I start taking to heart what people were saying and let my head swell up while patting myself on the back? Or would I graciously accept the compliments but immediately redirect them to the Lord, who had given me the skills and passion I was using, along with the opportunity to lead the publication?

 

Our journey through everyday life is filled with tests; not all of them involve unpleasant circumstances. If things are going well for you, perhaps receiving high praise for the work you’re doing or for the family you’re raising, beware. It could be God’s way of saying, “This is a test!”

 

As the apostle James declared, “Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love Him” (James 1:12).

Always Keeping One Eye on the Finish Line

For most of my life I’ve been an avid sports fan. Besides rooting for my favorite teams, one of the primary reasons is how sports can mirror the everyday realities of life.

 

The college football season is only a few weeks old, but we’ve already had teams that dominated most of the game but ran out of steam at the end, resulting in crushing defeat. We see something similar in auto racing, whether it’s NASCAR, IndyCar, Formula One or whatever: A driver can lead most of the race, even into the last lap, and still lose due to mechanical failure, a blown tire, running out of fuel or crashing. 

 

In Olympic running events, whether sprints or marathons, often the leader at the start – and even near the end – isn’t the one who wins the race. It’s like that for baseball, basketball, soccer, swimming or any other competition. They all must adhere to a basic principle: It’s not how you start but how you finish.

 

This reality is even more impactful for our journey through everyday living. We might start a new job full of excitement, more than willing to do whatever it takes to succeed. After a while, however, the enthusiasm wanes, we stop getting the “attaboys,” and before long we’re looking for a new job, whether out of choice or because the boss recommends that would be a good idea.

 

Bride and groom stand at the altar, all smiles and filled with emotion. They eagerly exchange their “I do’s” and can’t wait to get on with the thrill of being married. Years pass, maybe kids join the equation, bills pile up, and the initial attraction doesn’t seem to be there anymore. One or both parties decide that instead of “I do,” “I don’t.” Another marriage turns into a dismal statistic.

 

Nowhere is the importance of finishing well greater than in our spiritual life. The Bible is filled with examples of people who got off to excellent starts but stumbled before reaching the finish line. David, writer of many of the Psalms, slayer of Goliath and longtime king of Israel, experienced a less than spectacular finish. His family, consisting of children from numerous wives, became the poster child for dysfunctional families in that day. David’s sin with Bathsheba and his order to see her husband Uriah killed to cover up the scandal remained a permanent blemish on his legacy.

 

Solomon, David’s son with Bathsheba after their first child had died, started off in exemplary fashion. After David chose him to be the next king of Israel, Solomon assumed the throne with great humility. Instead of asking for material wealth and a long life, he asked the Lord only for wisdom. “So give your servant a discerning heart to govern your people and to distinguish between right and wrong. For who is able to govern this great people of yours?” (1 Kings 3:9).

 

Sounds great, right? Solomon became known for his great wisdom, oversaw great construction projects including the long-awaited temple to worship God in Jerusalem and his own palace, and accumulated riches beyond calculation. However, later in life he defied the Lord’s commands. Solomon began compromising, forging alliances with foreign powers rather than trusting in God alone. He also managed to acquire a total of 700 wives and 300 concubines from different nations and cultures.

 

We read the sad conclusion in 1 Kings 11:4, “As Solomon grew old, his wives turned his heart after other gods, and his heart was not fully devoted to the Lord his God, as the heart of David his father had been.” What a sad epitaph!

 

There are other biblical examples, most tragic of all being Judas Iscariot, who had been one of Jesus’ 12 closest disciples. Imagine being able to hang out with Jesus, day after day for much of His earthly ministry. And yet at the end, opportunistic, scheming Judas betrayed Jesus for 30 pieces of silver – and took his own life by hanging from a tree.

 

Contrast these with the apostle Paul, who had been transformed from persecutor of the Jewish followers of Jesus to one of His foremost advocates. Despite hardships of many kinds, beatings and stonings, at the end of his life Paul was able to state, without pride but simply as a fact, “I am already being poured out like a drink offering, and the time of my departure is at hand. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith” (2 Timothy 4:6-7).

 

That is the kind of epitaph I’d like to have said of me. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve observed the examples of my “elders,” some of whom are now in their 80’s and even 90. Many of them are still determined to “press on,” as Paul wrote in Philippians 3:14. They remain engaged in serving the Lord and others, sharing their faith whenever they have the opportunity and helping other believers advance in their faith by discipling, mentoring, and being accountability partners. They’re finishing well – and inspiring many others as they do so.

 

These friends eagerly anticipate one day standing before the Lord in heaven and hearing Him declare, “Well done, good and faithful servant!” (Matthew 25:21). Is that your hope and expectation?

It Was the ‘Most’ That He Could Do

Suppose you had to make a literal life-and-death decision: Take steps to save the life of someone you dearly loved, or choose instead to protect the lives of dozens, even hundreds of people – at the expense of your loved one? That’s a horrendous question even to ask, much less consider. Hopefully none of us would ever be in that position. Nevertheless, what do you think you’d do?

 

This is the plot of a short film, “Most,” set in the Czech Republic. It’s not new, having been produced in 2003. But it won multiple awards from the film industry, and more than 20 years later continues to draw strong reactions from all who view it. It’s about a single father who takes his eight-year-old son to work with him, never imagining the consequences.

 

The father is the bridge tender for a railroad drawbridge which spans a river. His job is simple – when ships approach, raise the drawbridge until they pass, then lower it so oncoming trains can go over it. One particular day he brings his son with him to work. They’re having lunch when he receives a call that a train is coming, earlier than expected. Since he has just raised the bridge to allow a ship to pass through, he must quickly lower it again for the oncoming train. 

 

Unfortunately, while the father is occupied in the engine room, the son innocently decides to play nearby. He stumbles and falls into the drawbridge’s gearworks, becoming caught and unable to get out. As the father looks down in horror at his son’s plight, he also hears the whistle of the train fast approaching. Instantly the bridge tender is faced with an impossible, no-win decision: Leave the drawbridge up and save his son but cause the deaths of hundreds of people on the train – or lower the bridge at the expense of his son’s life.

 

With no time to weigh pros and cons, he agonizingly lowers the drawbridge, securing the train’s safe passage but resulting in killing his son. Passengers on the train are busy talking and laughing, oblivious to the unthinkable choice the father has make.

 

There’s more to this fictitious story, but as an allegory it asks us to ponder the imponderable. How could a loving father allow his own son to die?

 

It’s not too hard to think of another Father who made a similar choice, one of even greater, eternal significance. Approximately 2,000 years ago, Jesus Christ, the Son of God was crucified as God the Father looked on. This was the plan from the start, not an unforeseen circumstance. As Romans 5:8 tells us, “But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

 

This wasn’t a death by lethal injection, gas chamber, firing squad, or even hanging. It was being nailed to a wooden cross, regarded by many as the most horrendous, excruciating method for execution ever devised. The Roman Empire made lots of worthwhile contributions that we still benefit from today, but crucifixion wasn’t one of them.

 

But even greater than Jesus’ physical pain was the absolute interruption of the perfect harmony He and God the Father had enjoyed for all of eternity. The reality of the Trinity – Father, Son and Holy Spirit – is something that confounds the human mind. But we read the devastation Christ’s crucifixion caused in His agonizing words, “My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?” (Matthew 27:46).

 

We can’t begin to comprehend what this was like, but the Scriptures leave no doubt as to why it was necessary. The book of Romans states the case with clarity. Perhaps in response to anyone who might claim, “Well, I’m a pretty good person,” or “It doesn’t matter what you believe, as long as you’re sincere,” Romans 3:10-12 declares, “There is no one righteous, not even one; there is no one who understands, no one who seeks God. All have turned away, they have together become worthless; there is no one who does good, not even one.”

 

Could it be clearer than that? There’s an incredible dilemma, one we can’t resolve: Each one of us is utterly sinful, totally undeserving of the love of a perfect, holy, righteous God. As the apostle Paul confessed in the same letter to believers in Rome, “What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death?” (Romans 7:24).

 

However, in the very next verses Paul writes that God – as only He could – has provided the remedy: “Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord!... Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Romans 7:25-8:1).

 

Another passage expresses both the problem and the solution: “This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe…for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by His grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus. God presented Him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in His blood…” (Romans 3:22-25).

 

The image of the bridge tender consciously sacrificing his son so the passengers on the train would live gives us a small measure of understanding. However, what the Lord did for us on the cross is of infinitely greater magnitude, literally a matter of eternal life or death. 

As Jesus told his friend Martha after her brother Lazarus had died – and before the Lord raised him from the dead – “I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in Me will never die” (John 11:25-26). And as the apostle affirmed with unwavering conviction, “For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 6:23). That truly was the “Most” He could do.