Overcoming the Enemies of Contentment

Suppose you were hired for a job and told the company had established 10 rules that had to be abided by without exceptions. Would you accept the job?

 

As long as the rules were reasonable, most of us would. Unless the rules were something like being required to work 100 hours a week, not being allowed to take any breaks or eat lunch, or doing something illegal. Virtually every job comes with certain rules. Some require wearing of uniforms or a specific dress code. Employers rightfully expect employees to arrive for work on time, and often give them detailed job descriptions. Without rules there would be chaos.

 

For many years it was not uncommon to find the Ten Commandments displayed at workplaces. We can still see them in some of the federal buildings in Washington, D.C., as well as government buildings in some states. But as someone has quipped, having the Ten Commandments in plain sight can create a hostile working environment for some folks.

 

Actually, the commandments are fairly straight-forward, as presented in Exodus 20 and Deuteronomy 5. The first four deal with one’s relationship with God: Have no other gods but the Lord; don’t worship idols; don’t take God’s name in vain; keep the Sabbath as a day of rest.

 

The other six concern relationships with one another: Give honor and respect for one’s parents; don’t commit murder; don’t commit adultery; don’t steal things that aren’t yours; always tell the truth; and don’t covet other people’s stuff. Nothing in that list seems unreasonable, does it? But try as we might, we break one or more of those commands every day in thought, word and/or deed.

 

Each commandment is worthy of exposition to explore why God saw fit to include it in the “Top 10” list. But perhaps the one we hear about the least is the last, which says:

“You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife. You shall not set your desire on your neighbor’s house or land, his manservant or maidservant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor” (Deuteronomy 5:21).

 

It’s not much of a mystery why the Lord inserted this one among the Ten Commandments. It’s hard to establish a healthy, trusting relationship with others when you are intensely coveting – or desiring – the things they possess. But the practice of “comparing ourselves with the Joneses” is something most of us have engaged in probably more than once.

 

Maybe a neighbor always seems to be driving a new car loaded with all the accessories. Their home might be the envy of everyone on the street. Photos they regularly post on social media about their latest exotic trip might cause us to wonder why we don’t get to travel as they do. Or they might have the seemingly picture-perfect marriage, their kids are the most mannerly, and they attend the very best schools. What’s wrong with coveting things like that?

 

There are many reasons, but perhaps foremost is that coveting is the enemy of a trait that should be evident in our lives if we are followers of Jesus Christ: Contentment. Writing to his young protégé, Timothy, the apostle Paul declared, “godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it” (1 Timothy 6:6-7).

 

What kind of witness for Christ can we be if we’re obviously jealous or envious of other people’s lives and what they have?

 

Of course, we live in a society that bombards us with messages discouraging contentment, saying what we have isn’t enough, that no matter how much we have we need more. This flies against biblical teachings that God is the one who provides us with what we need. As Paul wrote in another letter, “And my God will meet all your needs according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:19).

 

To covet what someone else has that we don’t is like complaining to the Lord that He hasn’t been good enough or kind enough to us, that if He really loved us He’d give us more.

 

Jesus warned against such thinking. He said, “…do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear…. For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. But seek His kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well” (Luke 12:22,30-31).

 

What about people who aren’t committed to following Christ? They might clearly be living contrary to God’s design, and yet they’re prospering, seemingly happy as they could be. What’s up with that? 

 

King David of Israel, who experienced more than his share of opposition and adversity during his lifetime, apparently wondered about this as well. His conclusion: “Do not fret because of evil men or be envious of those who do wrong; for like grass they will soon wither, like green plants they will soon die away” (Psalm 37:1).

Surrounded by enemies of contentment, we’d be wise to take to heart Paul’s advice to Timothy: “But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that” (1 Timothy 6:8). 

Conquering the Conundrum of Discontentment

Have you ever been invited into a friend’s home for the first time and marveled with envy at their house and its design? Or gotten out of your 10-year-old car just as your neighbor drove up with a new SUV and you thought, ‘Wow, I’d like to have a car like that’? Maybe you’ve felt jealous of someone who had a better job than you – or a better income?

 

To be honest, there have been times when feelings like that have crossed my mind. I suspect this is one of the reasons “you shall not covet” (Exodus 20:17) is included among the Ten Commandments. In our materialistic world, we’ll always find someone having something we’d like to have ourselves. It might be the pool in their backyard, the photo-perfect vacations they take each year, their wardrobe, or their seemingly ideal marriage. We can become preoccupied with thoughts of, ‘I wish…. I want…. If only….’

 

On top of that, we’re bombarded daily with TV, radio and movie ads, billboards and other messages designed to develop in us a sense of discontentment. The ads might not say it in so many words, but subtly they’re telling us, “Your life isn’t complete unless you buy this.” Or, “This is what you can’t do without.” It gets to the point where it’s hard to distinguish between our genuine needs – and our wants.

 

Of course, these impulses aren’t new. That’s why God commanded all of us not to covet “your neighbor’s house. You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, or his manservant or maidservant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor.” I don’t know anyone who’s confessed to coveting his neighbor’s ox or donkey, but that’s beside the point.

 

We might say the antithesis of coveting is contentment, being satisfied with whatever we have and wherever we are at the moment. Writing to his protégé, Timothy, the apostle Paul offered this perspective: “…godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that” (1 Timothy 6:6-8).

 

I remember an old friend I hadn’t seen in a long while. When I asked how he and his family were doing, he responded, “Well, we have a lot of wants, but don’t have any needs.” How many of us can say that and mean it? And yet, the Scriptures exhort us over and over to strive for contentment.

 

After thanking Christ followers in ancient Philippi for their support of his mission work, Paul added, “I am not saying this out of need, for I have learned to be content regardless of my circumstances. I know how to live humbly, and I know how to abound. In any and every situation I have learned the secret of being filled and being hungry, of having plenty and having need. I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:11-13). That is the key – through Christ.

 

While we might feel envious or jealous of other people’s life circumstances, most often our “coveting” is directly to money or things money can buy. The unidentified writer of Hebrews pointed this out: “Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, for God has said: ‘Never will I leave you, never will I forsake you’” (Hebrews 13:5). In essence, coveting what someone else has is like saying to the Lord, “You haven’t given me enough!”

 

King Solomon, whose vast wealth was coveted by leaders of other nations, ironically concluded from his own experience that discontentment – never being satisfied with what one already has – leads to vain pursuits: “He who loves money is never satisfied by money, and he who loves wealth is never satisfied by income. This too is futile” (Ecclesiastes 5:10).

 

One of Jesus’ favorite topics during His earthly ministry was money and material possessions – but not seeking to accumulate them. Instead, He admonished us to concentrate on things that won’t become damaged or lost. “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal” (Matthew 6:19-20).

 

Jesus made this declaration during His so-called “Sermon on the Mount,” but had more to say on the subject: “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes?... But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well” (Matthew 6:25,33).

 

These truths are important for us to hold onto, especially with Christmas fast approaching. As if we needed a reminder of this, stores are already displaying Christmas trees and other holiday finery, even though Halloween and Thanksgiving haven’t yet arrived. In the retail world Christmas, what we could call our annual “season of discontent,” can determine the difference between a profitable year and one that finishes in the red.

 

Discontentment is a universal problem, but it’s especially concerning for followers of Christ. As Paul said, “godliness with contentment is great gain” – and a powerful witness to the unbelieving world that’s always grasping for more. In the words of the old hymn, as we “turn our eyes upon Jesus, look full in His wonderful face…the things of earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace.”

Christmas and Its Conflict with Contentment

“What do you want for Christmas?” This is a question we’ve either asked of someone, or someone has asked of us. Perhaps both. Because Christmas is all about getting stuff we want, right? At least that’s the message we receive from advertisers and retail locations big and small, both real and virtual. 

 

We’re also told it doesn’t matter whether we can afford it or not. Just pull out a credit card. The old “buy now, pay later” strategy. Preacher Alistair Begg calls this the way to “fulfill your wanting without waiting.”

 

Of course, if you often read this blog, you might agree with my contention that Christmas isn’t about the advancement of materialism. Yes, gift giving is a time-honored part of the Christmas tradition, perhaps more in the U.S.A. than anywhere else. But when we start hearing characters in holiday movies, talk show commentators and TV commercials asking the over-used question, “What is the true meaning of Christmas?” my gut response is, “Duh!” 

 

Leave the Christ Child out of the equation and all we’ve got left is “mas.” Ironically, in Spanish the word “mas” means “more,” so perhaps that’s part of the reason that for many, Christmas turns into a quest for acquiring more and more stuff.

 

For followers of Jesus, however, the understanding of the meaning and purpose of Christmas is more straight-forward. It’s an annual celebration of a unique birth more than 2,000 years ago, when “The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us…who came from the Father, full of grace and truth” (John 1:14). If Jesus, whom believers came to recognize as “the Christ” or the promised Messiah, hadn’t been born, there would have been no need for a Christmas observance.

 

Let’s shift to the consideration of the gift-giving side of Christmas. After all, even Christ’s birth was marked with the presentation of gifts. Magi, wise men from the East who were led to seek out the fulfillment of prophecies dating back to the Old Testament days of Daniel, brought gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh as symbols of their reverence. 

 

We could rightly conclude that the exchange of gifts doesn’t violate any biblical principles or commandments. In fact, the Scriptures strongly endorse giving and cultivating a giving attitude. We often think of Jesus’ statement, “It is more blessed to give than to receive” (Acts 20:35), but we find admonitions for lavish, even hilarious giving throughout the Bible. 

 

I particularly like the encouragement from Proverbs 11:24-25, "One man gives freely, yet gains even more; another withholds unduly, but comes to poverty. A generous man will prosper; he who refreshes others will himself be refreshed.”

 

The problem comes when we confuse strivings for more and more with the ability to feel content with whatever we already have. The apostle Paul addressed this in cautioning his disciple, Timothy, “But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that” (1 Timothy 6:6-8).

 

Elsewhere the apostle, while addressing the willingness of believers in Philippi to support his ministry, wrote, “…I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want” (Philippians 4:11-12).

 

This is the challenge we face during this special season of the year, seeking to keep separate our wants from our needs, and to cultivate contentment in what could be termed, to borrow the words of John Steinbeck, “the winter of our discontent.”