We Might Try, But We Can’t Go it Alone

Early in the 17^th century, poet John Donne wrote “No Man Is an Island,” a brief introspecdtion about the universal connectedness of humankind. Here’s a portion of it:

“No man is an island entire of itself;

Every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main…

Any man’s death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind….”

 

Donne’s emphasis was not on death, but on the reality that we’re connected to others around us, like it or not. Unless we opt to become hermits and withdraw from society entirely, we can’t help but influence others and have them influence us.

Like many writers, I’m inclined to be an introvert. I could contentedly sit alone at my keyboard all day, letting thoughts flow through my fingers onto the computer screen. However, I’d be diminished greatly without time spent with my wife, family, friends and others God brings into my life.

 

From the first moments when He created humankind, God intended for people to live in relationship, “iron sharpening iron” as Proverbs 27:17 describes it. And perhaps more than ever, in today’s chaotic, totally unpredictable, turbulent world, we need one another.

 

Reports tell about suicide and drug abuse rates soaring, reflecting the despair and discouragement many people are feeling. We all need encouragement – having folks around us able to impart courage to us as we wade together through the hardships and trials of everyday living.

 

The Scriptures address this again and again. One of my favorite passages, Ecclesiastes 4:9-12, declares: 

“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work. If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

 

Whether in raising a family, tackling projects at work, engaging in community improvement endeavors, or competing on an athletic team, we need each other to succeed and excel. When we become weary, feel stuck and unable to proceed, or confront obstacles, it helps tremendously having others around on whom we can lean and find support.

 

For followers of Christ this is especially important as we live in an environment growing increasingly hostile to our faith and the Word of God. This isn’t new; believers in the early Church faced similar challenges. This is one reason the writer of Hebrews admonished: 

“Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for He who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another – and all the more as you see the Day approaching” (Hebrews 10:24-25).

 

Just as burning coals generate great heat together, but when separated lose their heat and eventually turn cold, we need to be intentional in seeking the fellowship of other like-minded people who share our faith, values and mission, even willing to rebuke us if we go astray. Earlier in the same book we’re told, “But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called ‘Today,’ so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness” (Hebrews 3:13).

 

I often think of the Old Testament prophet Elijah, used by God to perform many miracles, including a spectacular showdown with 450 prophets of the false god Baal. After all that God had done through him, Elijah still panicked and fled when he heard of evil queen Jezebel threatening his life. There were probably many reasons for how he responded, but one was surely because he felt alone. 

 

God twice sent an angel to minister to this pooped-out prophet, providing food and letting him sleep to recuperate from his ordeal. But afterward, when the Lord asked, “What are you doing here, Elijah?” the prophet responded, “I have been very zealous for the Lord God Almighty…. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me too” (1 Kings 19:5-10). Have you ever felt like Elijah, that “there’s nobody but me”?

 

He wasn’t really the only one, because God later revealed, “I have 7,000 in Israel – all whose knees have not bowed down to Baal and all whose mouths have kissed him” (1 Kings 19:18). But can we blame Elijah? Being a prophet of God was often a lonely existence; without anyone to offer encouragement, it easily could descend into a pity party. This can happen even for “non-prophets.”

During this time of year, TV commercials showing images of groups of people frolicking together in Christmas revelry can heighten one’s sense of isolation. “I guess I’m the only one not having any fun.” The remedy for us isn’t to withdraw but to seek out the company of others. And if the Lord shows us someone suffering from aloneness, it’s an opportunity to reach out to them with the love of Christ. That could be the greatest gift we give this season.  

Are We Overlooking the Greater Pandemic?

Can you remember back about two years, when none of us had ever heard of the coronavirus? Thoughts of COVID-19 had never crossed our minds. These days, however, the latest pandemic developments dominate newspaper and TV news coverage. We can’t escape the frightening reports. At the same time, as this global crisis continues, I wonder if there’s an even greater “pandemic” that’s getting no attention.

 

I’m referring to a problem that actually began building long before the first words about the virus were uttered – the pandemic of loneliness. One example is social media and how it has come to dominate many of our lives. They have created an artificial environment when we can have hundreds – even thousands – of “friends” and still be desperately lonely because we have no one with whom to talk and confide on a deep, personal level.

 

We’ve been bombarded by the statistics about COVID-19 deaths and the millions of other confirmed cases. But the realities about the impact of shutdowns, work stoppages and social isolation have not received nearly as much notice. People who regularly received support and fellowship from church, as well as other social activities, have understandably felt alone, even abandoned.

Suicides, drug overdoses, domestic violence and emotional breakdowns have escalated dramatically. It would be overly simplistic to blame those solely on the pandemic, but experts confirm it has been a very significant factor in the alarming increase of these and other social ills.

 

From the first moments of creation, God has underscored the importance of relationships. Referring to the eternally existing Trinity, Genesis 1:26 says, “Then God said, ‘Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth….’” And soon after He formed the first human, the Lord said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him” (Genesis 2:18).

 

Granted, some people are more sociable than others. Extroverts, by nature, need to be around people to remain energized while introverts – like me – prefer our interactions with others in smaller doses. But we all need to be around other folks to remain mentally, emotionally and even spiritually healthy.

 

Social media can be useful, but only to a limited degree. According to Facebook, I have more than 1,000 “friends,” but most of them I’ve never met in person. I could probably pass many of them on the street and not recognize them. And I wouldn’t want to have 1,000 real friends with whom I interact on a regular basis – who has time for that?

 

But we do need friends, including but not limited to family members. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 tells us, “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!... Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

 

Proverbs 27:17 expresses a similar sentiment: “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” Imagine attempting to sharpen a knife blade without something to hone it. Some of my most enjoyable times at work occurred when a small group of us gathered and engaged in creative friction.

 

The need to do whatever we can to escape the plague of loneliness is even more critical spiritually. One of my favorite passages concerning this is Hebrews 10:24-25, which admonishes, “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another – and all the more as you see the Day approaching.” 

 

During His earthly ministry, Jesus probably could have been a loner, walking from town to city by Himself, but He chose to select followers. This was in part to train them for carrying on His work after His death, resurrection and ascension. However, being both fully God and fully man, I suspect even Jesus needed the companionship and daily interactions. He often recruited them by simply saying, “Come and you will see” and “Follow Me” (Matthew 1:35-51).

 

It's important to recognize our own need for personal interactions that go far deeper than comments and “likes” on social media, even during a global health crisis that has impeded many of us from spending time with one another as we have in the past. We should also be sensitive to the needs of others, especially folks in places like nursing homes and hospitals, who might feel forgotten and unwanted. 

Recently I found an apt observation by Charles Ringma in his book, Dare to Journey with Henri Nouwen. He writes, “We are called to serve the world in which we live. Such serving is not simply a matter of techniques. It is also a matter of personal encounter. It is a matter of drawing close. It is a matter of care.” Think about that.