It Takes Two to Tango – and Many Other Things

Our society places a high premium on individuality and independence. We’ve had the “Me Generation”; slogans like “be true to yourself” and “look out for No. 1”; and a popular old-time cowboy TV show called “The Lone Ranger.” Hooray for Numero Uno, right?

However, many people have discovered that going solo isn’t everything it’s purported to be. The life of a hermit can be a lonely existence. Even the 1960s British pop band called Herman’s Hermits consisted of five “hermits.”

 

Back in 1969, a rock group called “Three Dog Night” recorded a hit tune called, “One.” But its lyrics didn’t exalt the virtues of oneness. See for yourself:

“One is the loneliest number that you’ll ever do

Two can be as bad as one

It’s the loneliest number since the number one….

 

‘Cause one is the loneliest number that you’ll ever do

One is the loneliest number…worse than two.”

 

Kind of a mournful message, but it seems to be reminding us that if you want to get the best out of life, don’t try doing it on your own. Long before “One” hit the airwaves, a very different song by jazz musician Louis Armstrong called “It Takes Two to Tango” agreed. Its lyrics observed:

“You can sail on a ship by yourself

Take a nap or a nip by yourself

You can get into debt on your own.

There’s a lot of things that you can do alone!  

 

But…Takes two to tango, two to tango

Two to really get the feeling of romance…do the dance of love.”

 

Indeed, we need two to accomplish many things. Take sports, for example. You can go fishing by yourself, yes. And you can play golf alone, but where’s the fun in that – unless you enjoy rewarding yourself with multiple mulligans? Try playing tennis, ping-pong or pickleball without a partner.

 

Some people seem to enjoy dining alone, but eating out usually is more enjoyable when it’s a shared experience. When traveling, the sights seem more enjoyable with someone else. An exception might be riding with a chronic ‘backseat driver,’ who thinks a car should have two steering wheels and two brake pedals. But that’s a different matter.

 

In the workplace, some things can be accomplished successfully alone, but in most cases, more can be done with two or more people collaborating. They can pool their collective talents and resources, bounce ideas off one another, see problems from different perspectives, encourage and challenge one another.

 

Most of all, during difficult times, two or more people can provide needed support that one person might lack. As the Old Testament says, “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work. If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up?... A cord of three strands is not quickly broken” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12).

 

Then there’s the value of ‘creative friction,’ working past disagreements to arrive at solutions that individual members of a team might not have discovered on their own. I’ve always appreciated Proverbs 27:17, which says, “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” I’ve seen this principle in action not only vocationally but also spiritually.

 

We should never forget the last thing Jesus Christ told His followers before He ascended to heaven after His resurrection. He said, “Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you” (Matthew 28:19-20).

 

Out of His small band of followers who spent time with Him 24/7 for three years, Jesus wanted to see multitudes of disciples – growing, learning and reproducing believers who would turn the world upside down. This indeed has happened, but it wasn’t an individual pursuit then – and it’s not now. 

 

Although we all are uniquely created by God, He has always intended for us to function together as the “body of Christ.” As the apostle Paul told believers in first-century Corinth, “Now the body is not made up of one part but of many…. Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it” (1 Corinthians 12:12-27).

There’s a lot more to that passage, but the point is we’re not here to live for ourselves. We’re here first of all to honor and serve God, and second, to join with other devoted followers of Christ to be and to share His Good News to a lost world that desperately needs to know about it. 

We Might Try, But We Can’t Go it Alone

Early in the 17^th century, poet John Donne wrote “No Man Is an Island,” a brief introspecdtion about the universal connectedness of humankind. Here’s a portion of it:

“No man is an island entire of itself;

Every man is a piece of the continent, a part of the main…

Any man’s death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind….”

 

Donne’s emphasis was not on death, but on the reality that we’re connected to others around us, like it or not. Unless we opt to become hermits and withdraw from society entirely, we can’t help but influence others and have them influence us.

Like many writers, I’m inclined to be an introvert. I could contentedly sit alone at my keyboard all day, letting thoughts flow through my fingers onto the computer screen. However, I’d be diminished greatly without time spent with my wife, family, friends and others God brings into my life.

 

From the first moments when He created humankind, God intended for people to live in relationship, “iron sharpening iron” as Proverbs 27:17 describes it. And perhaps more than ever, in today’s chaotic, totally unpredictable, turbulent world, we need one another.

 

Reports tell about suicide and drug abuse rates soaring, reflecting the despair and discouragement many people are feeling. We all need encouragement – having folks around us able to impart courage to us as we wade together through the hardships and trials of everyday living.

 

The Scriptures address this again and again. One of my favorite passages, Ecclesiastes 4:9-12, declares: 

“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work. If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

 

Whether in raising a family, tackling projects at work, engaging in community improvement endeavors, or competing on an athletic team, we need each other to succeed and excel. When we become weary, feel stuck and unable to proceed, or confront obstacles, it helps tremendously having others around on whom we can lean and find support.

 

For followers of Christ this is especially important as we live in an environment growing increasingly hostile to our faith and the Word of God. This isn’t new; believers in the early Church faced similar challenges. This is one reason the writer of Hebrews admonished: 

“Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for He who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another – and all the more as you see the Day approaching” (Hebrews 10:24-25).

 

Just as burning coals generate great heat together, but when separated lose their heat and eventually turn cold, we need to be intentional in seeking the fellowship of other like-minded people who share our faith, values and mission, even willing to rebuke us if we go astray. Earlier in the same book we’re told, “But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called ‘Today,’ so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness” (Hebrews 3:13).

 

I often think of the Old Testament prophet Elijah, used by God to perform many miracles, including a spectacular showdown with 450 prophets of the false god Baal. After all that God had done through him, Elijah still panicked and fled when he heard of evil queen Jezebel threatening his life. There were probably many reasons for how he responded, but one was surely because he felt alone. 

 

God twice sent an angel to minister to this pooped-out prophet, providing food and letting him sleep to recuperate from his ordeal. But afterward, when the Lord asked, “What are you doing here, Elijah?” the prophet responded, “I have been very zealous for the Lord God Almighty…. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me too” (1 Kings 19:5-10). Have you ever felt like Elijah, that “there’s nobody but me”?

 

He wasn’t really the only one, because God later revealed, “I have 7,000 in Israel – all whose knees have not bowed down to Baal and all whose mouths have kissed him” (1 Kings 19:18). But can we blame Elijah? Being a prophet of God was often a lonely existence; without anyone to offer encouragement, it easily could descend into a pity party. This can happen even for “non-prophets.”

During this time of year, TV commercials showing images of groups of people frolicking together in Christmas revelry can heighten one’s sense of isolation. “I guess I’m the only one not having any fun.” The remedy for us isn’t to withdraw but to seek out the company of others. And if the Lord shows us someone suffering from aloneness, it’s an opportunity to reach out to them with the love of Christ. That could be the greatest gift we give this season.  

When Unity Doesn’t Mean Uniformity

Overcoming the vast divide afflicting our nation today seems
as difficult as leaping the Grand Canyon in a single bound.

A blogger friend of mine recently addressed the subject of unity. This got me to thinking: Our nation is called the United States of America, but in some ways it seems we’ve never been more divided. Perhaps – and I tread gently as I say this – even more divided than during the days leading up to and during the Civil War.

Politics, an arena in which compromise and negotiation once seemed possible and desirable, has become divided to such an extreme the only common ground is agreement that “never the twain shall meet.” Achieving “middle ground” appears as realistic as crossing the chasm between the north and south rims of the Grand Canyon with a pogo stick.

Ideologies concerning gender, socio-economics, beliefs, lifestyles and even race despite progress we’ve celebrated since the 1960s, seem just as severely separated. Other divisions currently afflicting our once proudly United States come to mind. Perhaps national spell-check got confused and switched the spelling to “untied.”

Without intending to sound simplistic, one factor in these growing disunions could be confusion between unity and uniformity. The differences are considerable.

I remember back in the ‘60s – yes, I’m old enough to recollect them. Those were days when the hippie generation and young people across the country were attempting to display unity by length of hair, clothes they wore (and didn’t wear), the music they listened to, and the vocabulary they spoke. But as they conformed to their unique brand of non-conformity, what they really demonstrated was not unity but uniformity.

Bell-bottom pants, tie-dyed shirts, determination to be “out of sight” (which morphed into “far out”), espousing the virtues of free sex, the pressure to “turn on and tune out,” along with a resolve to “question authority,” had many of us marching in the lockstep of uniformity for a time. Conformed to a singular image of non-conformity, but united? Not really. For the most part, everyone was just looking out for themselves in the comfort of a crowd.

Seeds of that era have spawned current versions of uniformity (political correctness) and disunity (intolerance of anyone holding a view contrary to your own opinions and ideology).

Maybe it would be good to grasp the differences between uniformity and unity, recognizing that while a house divided against itself cannot stand, as Jesus stated in Mark 3:25, all the parts of the house don’t need to be identical.

It’s amazing how, in one way or another, the Bible talks about unity and its importance. It presents unity in terms of teamwork: “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17) and “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work…. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken” (Ecclesiastes 4:9,12).

When God created man and woman, He did so to provide unity and a complement for the other. Uniformity obviously was not the goal. As the French saying goes, “Vive la difference”!

And writing to believers in the ancient city of Philippi, the apostle Paul placed great emphasis on unity. “If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his hope, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Do nothing from selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others” (Philippians 2:1-4).

That’s an intriguing definition of what unity should look like. At the same time, Paul made clear this unity did not require uniformity. In fact, uniformity would have impeded unity. He wrote, using the metaphor of the human body to describe the Church, “The body is a unit, though it is made up of many parts, and though all its parts are many, they form one body…. Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it” (1 Corinthians 12:12-27).

So how can we once again become united in the midst of diversity, truly United States without having to become Uniform States?   As the apostle wrote above, stop focusing on our own interests, cultivate true humility, and strive to become one in spirit and purpose. Emphasize the common bonds that can unite us rather than the differences that can divide us.

Hardly a complete solution, but it could be a great start.

What Will Your Verse Be?

I don’t know if you saw it, but recently Apple produced an intriguing TV commercial for its iPad. One reason I noticed the ad is it featured the Ohio State University marching band, along with people from a broad range of other pursuits, all using the tablet for their various activities. What stuck with me, however, was the question it posed.

The voiceover during the commercial stated, in part:

“Each of us has something to share. A voice, a passion, a perspective. The potential to add a stanza to the world’s story…. What will your verse be?”

Simple, concise words, but they pack a wallop of insight. We’ve become seduced by the superstar mentality, wrongly believing that only people whose names appear in news headlines or on magazine covers are those with something to offer. That is far from true. Our lives might not merit a segment on the evening news, but we all have unique gifts, talents and interests that can make a difference in the lives of people God has placed in our special spheres of influence.

This quote from Charles Lindbergh reflects the life
of a man willing to dare, to explore the limits
of human achievement. 

What is your voice, passion, or perspective? For some people, it’s endangered or abused animals. For others it’s children in poverty or confronting serious needs. There are many people who share a passion for the advancement of the arts. Then there are political causes, literacy, the environment, or countless other passions that can consume our thoughts, time and energy.

If you’ve read more than one or two of my posts in this blog, you have a sense of what mine are: Communicating the relevance and practical value of the Bible – which I believe to be the true Word of God – and challenging others to apply and integrate its timeless principles into every area of their lives. That’s my passion, my perspective, shaped over more than 30 years study, discussion and experience.

But the portion of the Apple commercial’s script that intrigued me most was the idea we each possess the potential “to add a stanza to the world’s story.” If, over the course of your lifetime, you can make a difference in the life of at least one or two people, you’ll be inserting your own stanza into the narrative of the world.

We often think of composers, poets, statesmen, scientists, inventors and entrepreneurs that have had that kind of impact. But what about a homemaker; someone performing clerical work; a sales person in a retail store; a server in a restaurant, or someone who sets aside an hour or two every week to befriending and mentoring a child from a low-income, single-parent home?

If we had the opportunity to engage in something big, to become a participant in a highly publicized enterprise, most of us would jump at the chance. Why not? We all want to make a splash, a tremendous difference, right? But the little stuff, those behind-the-scenes duties no one seems to notice – who cares about that?

Well, for starters, God cares. In a passage familiar to many of us, Jesus told the "parable of the talents," a story of servants entrusted with varying amounts of money to manage during their master’s absence. Upon his return, the owner asked each for an accounting of how they had used the money. As it turned out, two of the three servants had invested the funds and reaped a considerable return.

To both the master replied, “Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful with a few things. I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness” (Matthew 25:14-30).

God has uniquely and specifically equipped each of us for a particular impact on the world around us, to “add our stanza to the world’s story.” But individually we must take the initiative to ensure that stanza is written. The Lord won’t do it for us. He’ll provide the opportunities; He’s already given us the abilities, talent and expertise. Now it’s our job to put them all to use.

So the question that begs for our answer is the one from the Apple ad: “What will your verse be?”

As I write this, I think of several people close to me whose verses have been finalized. The ink has dried, but the stanzas they wrote continue to resonate. Parts of them were inscribed on my own heart. My hope is that for someone somewhere, a portion of my verse, my stanza, will remain indelible on their heart as well. Proverbs 27:17 states, “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” God has used others to sharpen me over the years. My hope is that for someone else, I’ve been used as a sharpener.

So again I present the question of the day, one that ultimately can lead each of us to an assessment of whether we’ve lived a life worth living: What will your verse be?