Changes in Attitude, Changes in Gratitude

Many of us remember the popular song by the late country legend Jimmy Buffett, “Changes in Latitudes, Changes in Attitudes.” Featuring a lilting Caribbean beat, the tune reflects on how traveling to different places can greatly alter one’s perspective. With the annual Thanksgiving Day celebration upon us this week, it might be fitting to revise that a bit to: Changes in Attitude, Changes in Gratitude. 

Because despite all the heartwarming commercials and seasonal movies that depict loving, happy and harmonious families overflowing with gratitude, more than a few people are probably wondering, ‘Thankful for what?’ 

 

The past weeks, months, even year might have been difficult for you. Perhaps prolonged inflation has put a tremendous strain on your finances. Maybe you have lost a loved one, or experienced the devastation of a cherished relationship that’s been broken. Or serious health issues have overshadowed all else, making it hard to feel thankful about anything.

Problems like these, as well as others, can cast a pall on a season that should be festive and joyous. How can we overcome this?

 

At such times I often think of my friend Albert, who with his family has experienced more hardship in life than most of us could imagine. And yet, he’s managed to maintain a positive, upbeat perspective in life. In fact, he wrote a booklet about his life that he titled, “Saying ‘Thank You’ Even When You Don’t Feel Thankful.”

 

This might sound strange to some, but it’s consistent with what the Scriptures teach us. One of the first Bible verses I learned admonishes us to “give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus” (1 Thessalonians 5:18). It doesn’t say to give thanks in some circumstances, or to give thanks when things are going well. It says, “in all circumstances.”

 

Admittedly, this is more easily said than done. But over and over we see examples in the Bible of people going through great trials yet managing to remain thankful. As King David wrote, “If I say ‘Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,’ even the darkness will not be dark to You; the night will shine like the day and darkness is as light to You” (Psalm 139:11-12).

 

The apostles Paul and James write that we should “rejoice in our sufferings…” (Romans 5:3-5), and “Consider it pure joy…whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance…” (James 1:2-4).

 

How is this possible? We could attribute it to changes in attitude, changes in gratitude. Each of these important individuals in the Bible had gone through great adversity but discovered how even in the most difficult times, God was in the midst of them. They understood the truth of Romans 8:28, that “in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.”

 

There’s another good reason for choosing thankfulness and gratitude in life, even when those seem contrary to what we’re going through at the time. An article published on Epoch Health, a department of the Epoch Times online newspaper, was titled, “Gratitude: An Alternative Medicine for Anger and Depression.”

 

It discussed a scientific study in 2012 that discovered individuals who cultivated and practiced gratitude experienced lower levels of aggression, even after they had been insulted. By comparison, people in a control group – who did not practice attitudes of gratitude – experienced higher levels of aggression when insulted.

 

This study, that appeared in Social Psychological and Personality Science, found that “those practicing gratitude were significantly less likely to retaliate against others. This correlation is akin to laughter interrupting physical exertion: Just as it is impossible to continue a strenuous workout while laughing, gratitude elicits a psychological state where aggression and anger find little foothold.”

The conclusion was that the impact of gratitude for displacing hostile feelings shows it to be a personal virtue, a useful tool for the fostering of positive social interactions.

 

Another study published in 2005 showed the act of writing thank-you letters increased participants’ happiness by 10 percent – and reduced their depressive symptoms by 35 percent. And apparently this was not a short-term effect. The article says, “These feelings were sustained up to six months after writing the letter, highlighting the powerful effect of [thankfulness].”

 

Moral of the story? If you’re feeling down as the Thanksgiving Day holiday approaches, determine to be thankful anyway. Practice an attitude of gratitude – even if you can’t, as the Jimmy Buffett tune suggests, change your latitude.

 

As Psalm 118:24 declares, “This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.” This is true for Thanksgiving Day, and for every day. If He’s given us a new day, and we believe that He is good – which He is – we can and should rejoice and be glad in it. Happy Thanksgiving!

Sacrifices Aren’t Always What We Think

What does the term “sacrifice” mean to you? Sacrifices come in varied sizes, large and small. We might feel led to give a dollar or two to a “homeless” person standing along the roadside with a sign asking for help. We might pause to help the proverbial little old lady across the street or take in a stray puppy that seems lost and starving.

 

Then there are accounts of people making great, noble sacrifices: A single mom working two or more jobs to pay the bills and provide food and clothing for her children. A father filling the roles of both dad and mom while his wife recovers from serious illness. Parents scrimping and saving so a son or daughter can get the college education that wasn’t available to them. A young man or woman surrendering a kidney for an ailing sibling.

 

In the work world I’ve heard of business owners choosing to forgo their own paychecks so employees can get paid. Staff members working late into the night to ensure important deadlines are met or projects completed. Teachers spending their own money to provide needed supplies for their classes. 

 

Obviously, some sacrifices are more costly than others. We’ve heard stories of servicemen and women making “the ultimate sacrifice,” surrendering their lives on battlefields to save their comrades. These selfless acts affirm Jesus Christ’s teaching that it’s “more blessed to give than to receive” (Acts 20:35). Somehow, when we give to others – especially when it’s sacrificial – we can feel rewarded for doing the right thing.

 

The greatest sacrifice of all, many of us would agree, is what Jesus Christ did on our behalf. Romans 5:8 reminds us that, “God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” In 2 Corinthians 5:21 we read a similar affirmation: “God made Him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God.” 

 

I don’t know about you, but the sacrifice He willingly made to reconcile broken men, women and children to the Father still challenges my full comprehension.

 

Sacrifice is a recurring theme in the Bible. The Old Testament reveals an elaborate system of sacrifices God prescribed for the people of Israel – bulls, sheep, goats and grain – all intended to enhance their worship of the Lord and offer symbolic atonement for sins. Many of these sacrifices served as harbingers of Jesus’ ultimate sacrifice. But we find a somewhat different perspective on sacrifices in Psalm 50 that fits the season of thanksgiving and celebration we’re now entering. 

 

Speaking to the Israelites, the Lord said, “I do not rebuke you for your sacrifices or your burnt offerings, which are ever before Me. I have no need of a bull from your stall or of goats from your pens, for every animal of the forest is Mine and the cattle on a thousand hills….” In other words, their sacrifices weren’t giving anything to God that He didn’t already own.

 

Then the passage makes a shift , telling about a very different form of sacrifice, one the Lord says He prefers: “Sacrifice thank offerings to God; fulfill your vows to the Most High…. He who sacrifices thank offerings honors Me and he prepares the way so that I may show him the salvation of God” (Psalm 50:7-14,23).

 

We find a similar perspective in Psalm 51:17, which declares, “The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, You will not despise.” This isn’t to say the Lord doesn’t appreciate gifts we offer of our time, our talents and our treasures, especially those that require some level of sacrifice. But what He wants most is our hearts – sincere hearts of gratitude, reverence and worship.

 

Over the next weeks we’ll be bombarded with requests from ministries and charitable organizations for special year-end gifts to support and sustain their work, as well as to express our thankfulness to the Lord for what He is doing. Those are important and should be prayerfully and carefully considered. But as the passages above inform us, the greatest gift we can offer – the greatest sacrifice – is our unwavering, sincere thankfulness for all He has done and all that He is doing.

Finding a Selfish Reason for Being Thankful

Many of us spend weeks – for some, months – getting ready for the Christmas celebration. Buying trees and ornaments, putting up decorations, planning parties, purchasing gifts. And sometimes it seems as if we still don’t have enough time. What if we were to spend as much time getting ready for the annual Thanksgiving observance?

I’m not referring to assembling all the ingredients for the meal, including turkey or ham (or both), yams, cranberry sauce, pumpkin pie, etc. No, I mean getting into the true spirit of Thanksgiving – preparing to be genuinely thankful. So I’m dedicating a few posts, including on the holiday itself, to consider how we could best do that. First, a bit of motivation.

Tony, one of the pastors at our church, introduced a series he called “21 Days of Thankfulness” by citing a secular study by Dr. Robert A. Emmons, a psychologist and professor at the University of California-Davis. Described as “the world’s leading scientific expert on gratitude,” Emmons has written a number of books about what science has learned about being thankful, including, Thanks! How Practicing Gratitude Can Make You Happier. 

Turns out, according to his research, “We discovered scientific proof that when people regularly engage in a systematic cultivation of gratitude, they experience a variety of measurable benefits: psychological, physical, and interpersonal.” 

Among those benefits are greater happiness; lasting relationships; better health; fewer aches and pains; more alertness and determination; decreased stress, anxiety and depression, and better sleep. Who knew there’s actually a selfish reason for being thankful?

Once again, it seems, science is affirming what the Bible has been saying all along. We’re told in 1 Thessalonians 5:18, “give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” Another translation puts it this way: “in everything give thanks.”

When we read that, however, some among us might be tempted to argue, “Yeah, but you don’t know my circumstances!” But Philippians 4:6-7 provides this response: “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Could it be that a key to this promise is found in the simple phrase, “with thanksgiving”?

Living in a materialistic society, where the virtues of consumerism are exalted – and exploited – we’re bombarded by messages that give us every reason not to be thankful. Whether it’s a car, smartphone, TV, the latest high-tech gizmos or clothing, commercials, print advertising and even news reports tell us we’ll be woefully unfulfilled if we don’t have the latest and greatest. We watch romance movies with idyllic couples that can make us wonder, “Why isn’t my relationship like that?”

The Scriptures, however, offer the antidote for such poisonous wishful thinking. “But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that” (1 Timothy 6:6-8). In other words, we should learn to feel thankful for what we have.

Getting back to Dr. Emmons, his findings support biblical teachings that warn us against the pitfalls of being greedy, covetous and envious. He stated, “Our groundbreaking research has shown that grateful people experience higher levels of positive emotions, such as joy, enthusiasm, love, happiness and optimism, and that practice of gratitude as a discipline protect a person from the destructive impulses of envy, resentment, greed, and bitterness.”

So as we gear up for Thanksgiving Day, besides planning and preparing the meal, deciding which football games to watch, and whether we’re going to see the new holiday movie that’s just come out, maybe we should try warming up our “thanksgivers.” It would be good for us!

Cultivating an ‘Attitude of Gratitude’

My friend Clarence recently offered a good reminder in a video he posted on Facebook. He said that despite all the anger and angst that seems to pervade society today, we should strive to find something for which we can be grateful.

Even though I sometimes get seduced by the prevailing negativity myself, I wholeheartedly agree. A little known psychological fact – at least one that’s very under-appreciated – is the reality that circumstances and people don’t control our feelings and attitudes. (I hope it’s not racist to say that.)

From the beginning of humanity, there has always been dissatisfaction. Adam and Eve had access to just about everything in the garden of Eden. Were they happy and thankful about that? No, no. They wanted to sample the one tree God placed off limits to them, and the rest as they say, is history.

We can always find reasons for being discontented, or causes for making our blood boil. But what if we, as Clarence suggested, made an intentional effort to think of one thing – just one single thing – that we’re grateful for today? And then just focus on that for a bit. What kind of difference do you think that would make? 

Someone coined the term, having an “attitude of gratitude.” Sounds a bit corny, but it’s something we all should strive to attain – and maintain. Years ago following my open-heart surgery, I began a practice of starting each day by being thankful, simply for waking up that morning. Because not one of us has an iron-clad guarantee that we’ll have tomorrow. So when we awaken to a new day, it’s a gift and reason for being grateful. Maybe even cause for celebration.

Do you have a roof over your head? Be grateful. Did you have something to eat last night? Be grateful. Do you have a job? Be grateful, even if it’s not your dream job. Do you have some form of reliable transportation, even if it might be getting older and doesn’t have all of the fancy gadgetry of newer models? Be grateful. Do you have clothes and don’t have to walk around in public in the nude? Be grateful – and so should we!

We can be grateful if we have a spouse, children, grandchildren, or friends. If we were able to exercise yesterday, whether at a gym, the Y, or even strolling around the mall, we can be grateful. The list could go on, but surely, no matter what our circumstances might be, we all can find one thing for which to be grateful. I’ve seen videos of people who have lost a limb, perhaps in wartime conflict, or folks without limbs at all, and yet somehow they manage to be grateful.

One of the first Bible verses I ever learned says, “In everything give thanks, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus” (1 Thessalonians 5:18). Another translation expresses it, “give thanks in all circumstances….” I’ve read this many times, and even considered the context in which the apostle Paul wrote it. But I’ve never seen anything that qualifies this admonition, nothing that says, “Give thanks except…” or, “Give thanks, but…,” or even, “Give thanks when….”

Another of my favorite passages, Philippians 4:6-7, tells us, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” Then it says, “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” The phrase, “the peace of God,” could easily apply to everything and anything that goes on around us in this chaotic, restless world in which we live. 

Do you feel angry? Find some reason for being grateful. Are you discontented? Even if you have to search for it, find one reason to be grateful today. Have you come to the conclusion that now, without any doubt, the world is going to hell in the proverbial handbasket? Shift your focus by finding some reason for being grateful. 

Or as my friend Albert, who has endured more than his share of adversity over the course of his life, often says, “Learn to say ‘Thank you!’ even when you don’t feel thankful.” Who knows? If you make it a point to do this, and I make it a point to do it too, we might just start a trend! And once in a while, a trend turns into a movement. Let’s lead the way!