Who Gave Discipline a Bad Name?

Being sports spectators gives us the advantage of being able to admire and appreciate the skills of athletes who have trained countless hours to excel. Watching the recent Summer Olympics, for example, we saw gymnasts performing an array of flips, tumbles, spins and other feats that would leave the rest of us with broken bones and torn muscles.

 

We saw pole vaulters soaring to amazing heights. Discus and hammer throwers hurling heavy weights incredible distances, executing powerful spins that would leave most of us in a dizzy heap. Sprinters blazing at world-record paces, and runners battling through fatigue and pain over distances we wouldn’t even attempt.

 

How do they become so accomplished in their various events? I think of the pro football player who was asked how the pregame practice had gone. “Practice?” the player asked in amazement. “We talkin’ about practice?” Yes, practice – lots of it – is how gifted athletes hone their talents to become champions.

 

However, there’s more to practice than just repetition. Even though it seems to have gone out of fashion in the minds of many, it’s discipline. It’s the determination and resolve to be unrelenting in the pursuit of excellence and mastery. It’s putting in countless hours repeating basic skills so they become second nature, executed without having to think about them. 

 

Consider the virtuoso pianist who, decades after having begun playing, still spends time practicing the scales to maintain finger dexterity and strengthen muscle memory. Many of us marvel, wishing we could play the piano with such skill. But the truth is, which of us would be willing to discipline ourselves to invest the innumerable hours needed to become so skilled?

 

Most of us will never be championship athletes, celebrated musicians, or elite surgeons or scientists. But that doesn’t mean we can’t benefit from discipline in our lives. Somewhere along the line, discipline received a bad name. As if it’s some contagious disease no one wants to catch.

 

Discipline and punishment are often regarded as synonymous, but they’re very different. Punishment is designed to address wrongful behavior; discipline is intended to train and equip people to do what’s right. 

 

These days many parents are reluctant or unwilling to discipline their children, thinking even toddlers have enough sense to recognize right from wrong. The fact is, they don’t. This is why Proverbs 22:6 admonishes, “Train [discipline] a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” The role of parents is to love their children and provide for their needs, but also to discipline – correct them when they’re off course and train them in how to live, think and behave properly.

 

But discipline isn’t only for children. It’s something we all need and should embrace. The Scriptures explain it’s one of God’s primary means for guiding and shaping us. In Proverbs, one of the Old Testament’s wisdom books, discipline is often mentioned. One chapter, Proverbs 19, offers three significant references:

“Discipline your son while there is still hope…” (Proverbs 19:18). There may be a time when it’s too late for sound correction. Don’t wait until then.

“Listen to counsel and accept discipline, that you may be wise the rest of your days” (Proverbs 19:20). Rejecting well-intended discipline and godly counsel often leads to foolish decisions and regretful actions.

“Cease listening, my son, to discipline and you will stray from the words of knowledge” (Proverbs 19:27). Many a hard-headed individual has ignored discipline and correction and later had to face hard consequences.

 

Sometimes when we encounter adversity, we feel confused or angry. ‘Why is God doing this to me? Why’s He allowing this to happen?’ Before jumping to the conclusions that we’re being punished or that the Lord is mad at us for some reason, we need to consider what the Scriptures say about how He uses discipline in our lives:

 

“My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do not lose heart when He rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines the one He loves, and He chastens everyone He accepts as His son. Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as His children. For what children are not disciplined by their father? If you are not disciplined – and everyone undergoes discipline – then you are not legitimate, not true sons and daughters at all. Moreover, we have all had human fathers who…disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, in order that we may share in His holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it” (Hebrews 12:5-11).

 

Sometimes a parent will deny a child something he or she wants; other times the parent will insist that they do something they don’t want to do. “I’m doing this for your good. It’s because I love you,” the parent will say. At the time the child may think, ‘Yeah, right,’ only to realize later the parent in fact did it for his or her good. Sometimes the best demonstration of love is discipline.

 

God loves us far more than any parent could. He gave His one and only Son to die on a cross to redeem us from our sins (Romans 5:8). If that’s true, why shouldn’t we trust that when He disciplines us, it’s for our very best – part of His process for training and transforming us into the people He wants us to be.

 

And if we also desire to become who the Lord wants us to be, we must learn to discipline ourselves. There are many good ways of doing this, but one of the best is devoting consistent time to reading, studying, meditating on, memorizing and applying the Word of God. Like the professional athlete who practices until certain skills become second nature, we need to make the Scriptures central to our everyday lives so that over time they become second nature for our thinking and behavior.

 

Teachability: the Greatest Growth Ability

What do you think are the most important qualities for someone who desires to grow spiritually? We could list numerous possibilities. But from personal experience – in getting to know people who are living out their faith in incredible ways; striving to mentor and disciple other men, and seeking to grow in my own faith – I would rank teachability at or near the top.

Teachability isn't so much
about teaching as it is
about learning.

I’m not referring to the ability to teach, but rather the ability to be taught; willingness to learn from others. Because not everyone is teachable, and I must admit there have been times when I was among them. Often in the Scriptures we see the term “stiff-necked” to describe such people. 

For instance, in Exodus 34:9, Moses speaks to God about his frustration in leading a people determined to live contrary to what they had been instructed: "’Lord,’ he said, ‘if I have found favor in your eyes, then let the Lord go with us. Although this is a stiff-necked people, forgive our wickedness and our sin, and take us as your inheritance.’" Basically, Moses – whom God had appointed to lead the Israelites – is saying, “There’s no teaching these folks!”

King Solomon addressed this a number of times in the book of Proverbs, including willingness to accept correction as a sign of teachability. He admonished, “Do not rebuke a mocker or he will hate you; rebuke a wise man and he will love you” (Proverbs 9:8). Solomon also observed, “He who heeds discipline shows the way to life, but whoever ignores correction leads others astray” (Proverbs 10:17).

There are other important aspects to teachability beyond being willing to receive discipline and constructive criticism. One is determining to put to use what you’ve learned. The writer of Proverbs declared, "Whoever heeds life-giving correction will be at home among the wise" (Proverbs 15:31). Writing to his protégé, Timothy, the apostle Paul instructed, “Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me – put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you” (Philippians 4:9).

Being teachable means more than simple acquisition of information. Again writing to Timothy, Paul warned of what he termed “terrible times in the last days.” The apostle described people “having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people…always learning but never able to come to a knowledge of the truth” (2 Timothy 3:5,7). Seems like this could apply today just as well as it did thousands of years ago. 

The teachable person is someone who doesn’t hoard what he or she has learned, but is eager to pass it along to others. Paul drew a verbal picture of multi-generational discipleship when he told Timothy, “And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable men who will also be qualified to teach others” (2 Timothy 2:2). The teachable person is one who in turn resolves to teach others – paying it forward.

And how do we succeed in cultivating a teachable spirit? An indispensable element, I’ve discovered, is an old-fashioned virtue called humility – being humble enough to recognize that we don’t know it all, that we can learn from others, and our lives and the lives of others can be enhanced by what we learn.

Another apostle, James, addressed this when he equated teachability with wisdom: “Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show it by his good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom” (James 3:13).

What’s the moral of this “story”? First of all, we’re never too old to learn. You can teach “old dogs” new tricks, if they are willing to be taught. It can be humbling to have to admit we’ve been wrong about something, or didn’t know as much as we thought we did. But once we’ve learned something important, we also need to be willing to share it so others can benefit and hopefully, grow spiritually as well.