What Does (Or Will) Your ‘Second Half’ Look Like?

For many sports fans, whether their favorite is American football, basketball or soccer, each contest comes in two parts – a first half and a second half. In many cases the second half is most important, because that is when strategic adjustments are made based on what has happened in the first half.

 

It’s not unusual for one team to go into the locker room at halftime with a substantial lead, only to see that lead evaporate because of changes the opponent has made for the second half. And the team that is trailing at halftime can come out for the second half hopeful that adjustments they’ve made will work in their favor.

 

In a similar way, life often has two halves. For lots of folks, especially men, the first half of their lives is primarily about success. Establishing a career, climbing the corporate ladder, increasing the income, gaining recognition and a solid reputation in whatever vocation they choose. Status, prestige, affluence, power. These all can be intoxicating motivators for one’s early and middle adult years.

 

However, there often comes a time when the goals and targets we’ve set have either been achieved or lose their luster. Some start to relate to the refrain from the old Peggy Lee song, “Is that all there is?” I’ve heard many executives and entrepreneurs speak about “climbing the ladder of success, only to discover it was leaning against the wrong wall.”

 

What happens then? Many a wise person has recognized that success is fleeting. King Solomon of Israel, who wrote all or part of several books in the Bible, was acclaimed for his wisdom as well as the grandeur of his kingdom and the vast wealth he had accumulated. Yet, nearing the end of his life, he cynically concluded much of what he had accomplished was futile.

 

Solomon wrote, “I denied myself nothing my eyes desired; I refused my heart no pleasure. My heart took delight in all my work, and this was the reward for all my labor. Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done and what I had toiled to achieve, everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind; nothing was gained under the sun” (Ecclesiastes 2:10-11).

 

Tell us how you really feel, King Sol! Just verses later he added, “So I hated life, because the work that is done under the sun is grievous to me…. I hated all the things I had done under the sun because I must leave them to the one who comes after me. And who knows whether he will be a wise man or a fool? Yet he will have control over all the work into which I have poured my effort and skill under the sun. This too is meaningless” (Ecclesiastes 2:17-19).

 

Thanks for the encouraging words, right? Well, if success isn’t all it’s supposed to be, what are we to do? This is where our ‘second half’ comes in. Rather than continuing the quest for success in whatever work God has entrusted us to perform, we can shift our focus to significance.

 

Reading Solomon’s dire musings in Ecclesiastes, it’s clear he was reflecting on the temporary nature of life. Outstanding careers and grand enterprises are built and then come to an end. This year’s star player will soon be replaced by someone else. Great companies of decades ago either disappear entirely, are absorbed by other corporations, or undergo major restructuring, often bearing little resemblance to what they once were. 

 

Unlike success, significance is something that endures long after our earthly lives have ended. This is one reason the term “legacy” has gained popularity. In fact, for years I worked for a non-profit called Leaders Legacy in which our goal was to touch lives for Jesus Christ through a unique strategy of leadership development, mentoring, coaching and team building. Ironically, Leaders Legacy no longer exists as an entity, but its impact is continuing through the lives of men, women and families it touched.

 

Okay, if success isn’t the be-all-end-all, then how do we achieve significance in the second half of our lives? This isn’t easy to answer because it’s not one-size-fits-all. But it involves using the gifts, talents and experience God has given us and passing those along to people He brings into our lives. For one person this might mean volunteering in an area of interest. It might mean mentoring someone, a younger adult or child. In serving as a spiritual mentor or disciple-maker, the age of the person doesn’t matter – what does matter is their desire to grow in their faith and understanding of how to live it out practically.

 

Once their children have grown, many people shift into the role of nurturing grandparents, again investing their wisdom and experience into the next generation. Some folks, having gone as far as they could in their careers or upon retiring, decide to pursue an avocation or passion they never had time to cultivate, something that can influence others in a positive way. This could range from coaching a youth sports team to working in a local food bank to teaching a continuing education class.

 

The apostle Paul understood this idea, what some people term “paying it forward.” Writing to his protégé Timothy, the apostle exhorted, “And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable men who will be qualified to teach others” (2 Timothy 2:2). That single verse represents four generations of believers, and I’m certain the spiritual genealogy of many people today traces  back to Paul and Timothy.

 

Years ago, a good friend, among many individuals who made meaningful investments into my own life spiritually, showed me an Old Testament verse that refers to benefits gained – including significance – that come from giving out of our lives to others. In Isaiah 43:4 God declares, “Since you are precious and honored in My sight and because I love you, I will give men in exchange for you, and people in exchange for your life” (Isaiah 43:4).

Imagine you’re a football team that has just returned to the field from halftime, trailing by a few points. You’ve assessed what happened in the first half. The question you must answer now is, “What will your second half look like?” 

For Everything There Indeed Is a Season

Did you hear about the teacher who asked little Jimmy to name the four seasons? Having been raised in a family of cooks, Jimmy quickly responded, “Salt, pepper, oregano and garlic.” Probably not exactly what she had in mind.

 

But here we are at the start of another season. Recently I noticed a sign in the fitness area of our local YMCA that read, “Fall Prevention Meeting.” I shrugged my shoulders and thought, “What’s the use? Autumn is going to come, just as it does every year, whether we like it or not.” No way to prevent it, right?

 

Okay, all seriousness aside, the arrival of Fall – along with the other seasons of the year – serves as a reminder that time marches on, that the heat of summer will eventually end and that the chill (or deep-freeze) of winter can’t be too far behind. This reminds me of a passage in the Bible which declares, “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven” (Ecclesiastes 3:1).

 

Back in the mid-1960s the Byrds, an American rock band, recorded a tune called “Turn! Turn! Turn!” that had been written by Pete Seeger in 1959. The song began, 

“To everything (turn, turn, turn)
There is a season (turn, turn, turn)
And a time to every purpose, under heaven

A time to be born, a time to die
A time to plant, a time to reap
A time to kill, a time to heal
A time to laugh, a time to weep….”

 

Researching the origins of “Turn! Turn! Turn!,” I discovered Seeger had based the lyrics on pieces of text he’d written in his pocket notebook. He described the words he had copied from the Bible as “verses by a bearded fellow with sandals, a tough-minded fellow called Ecclesiastes.” Well, he was partly right. The words came from the book of Ecclesiastes, attributed to Israel’s King Solomon, who almost certainly had a beard.

 

Seeger used the wording of Ecclesiasts 3:1-8 almost verbatim but turned his composition as a protest song of sorts, adding the words, “A time for peace; I swear it’s not too late.” When the Byrds’ version came out during the height of the Vietnam War, it became a smash hit.

 

For those of us who have lived long enough, we know there indeed are seasons to life – many of them. There are the chronological seasons of infancy, toddlerhood, adolescence, the teen years, early adulthood, mature adulthood (at least for some people), and finally, “Wow! You look good for your age!” We go through seasons of schooling, starting and forging careers, and retirement.

 

The remainder of the passage in Ecclesiastes sums the scope of life very concisely: “a time to tear down and a time to build…a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.”

 

But there’s another phrase that quickly follows this passage that’s sometimes overlooked. It says, “[God] has made everything beautiful in its time” (Ecclesiastes 3:11). Sometimes as we’re slogging through a particularly difficult season of life, it seems anything but beautiful. But through the wonders of hindsight, we can discover that despite the pain or stress or anxiety that “season” might have caused, God truly was using it to create something beautiful in our lives.

 

In my own life, I’ve lost track of all the many seasons I’ve gone through. Childhood is but a faint memory; my high school and college years I’d describe as youthful foolishness; marriage and parenting have been seasons of much learning, with some lessons still being learned. And since I left full-time employment and became a grandfather, that’s been a completely different season of its own.

 

I’d like to think that, like the apostle Paul, “When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me” (1 Corinthians 13:11). But I still have my moments, I must admit.

 

The point it, no matter what season of life you find yourself in – in the midst of planting or reaping, laughing or weeping, keeping or throwing away – God does have a purpose for it, even though you might not appreciate what that is until you can view it in retrospect. So if you’re currently mourning, there will yet be a time for dancing and vice versa. To everything – turn, turn, turn – there is a season.

Focusing On the Things That Really Matter in Life

Whenever possible, I give credit where it’s due, whether borrowing an insight from a friend, quoting from a book, or even using something I’ve read on social media. However, recently I came across a list called “Things That Really Matter in Life” and although I would like to give proper attribution, I have to admit I don’t know the originator.

 

Nevertheless, it’s too good not to discuss. So I’ll cite and comment on parts of it, with appreciation to Mr. or Ms. Anonymous. Each item on the list starts with, “3 things in life that….” Here they are, for your consideration:

 

3 things in life that never come back when gone: Time. Words. Opportunity.

3 things in life that should never be lost: Peace. Hope. Honesty.

3 things in life that are most valuable: Love. Faith. Prayer.

3 things in life that make a person: Hard work. Sincerity. Commitment.

3 things in life that are constant: Change. Death. God.

 

Reading through this thoughtful list, I’ve noticed one common theme: Not one of these can be purchased with money. They are, in fact, priceless. Which is interesting, because of the things we spend the most money on – cars and houses and clothes and gadgets, education, travel, power, career advancement, status – none of them appear on the list above.

We can spend money on “time management” systems and devices, but in reality, time passes at the same pace, no matter what we try to do. We can’t stop its passage. All we can do is decide how to use the time we have – when we have it.

 

The saying, “Talk is cheap,” is true to an extent. But talk can also be costly, when we say the wrong things to the wrong people at the wrong time. When we miss out on an opportunity, we usually can’t buy it back no matter how hard we try.

 

With the chaos and turmoil of the past year – which threatens to continue into this new year – what we wouldn’t pay for peace and hope, right? And honesty? These days that seems in shorter supply than toilet paper!

 

Most of us received gifts for Christmas; some got lots of them. But you can’t buy genuine love. Faith is another priceless intangible. I’ve learned it’s worth more than the combined net worth of Bill Gates, Warren Buffett, Jeff Bezos, Oprah Winfrey, Elon Musk and as many other multi-billionaires you can think of. And you can’t put a price tag on prayer, the sacred privilege of communing and communicating with the Creator of the universe.

 

In today’s world, so many people seem determined to get “free stuff,” things they have not earned and, probably, don’t deserve. But what employer wouldn’t want to hire people dedicated to working hard, are sincere in everything they do, and committed to doing their very best, regardless of the circumstances?

 

Many of us like change only when it’s on our terms, but things still change whether we like them to or not. And often, the changes are not of our preference. Death was much in the news over the past 12 months, but it’s the destination for us all, pandemic or no pandemic. Which leads us to the last, but most important of the three constants listed: God.

 

In his grand, but often cynical Old Testament book of Ecclesiastes, King Solomon essentially affirms the theme of the above list. He opens by declaring, “’Meaningless! Meaningless,’ says the Teacher. ‘Utterly meaningless! Everything is meaningless!’” (Ecclesiastes 1:2). Tell us exactly how you feel, Solomon! Don’t beat around the bush, okay?

 

He proceeds to explain, “I denied myself nothing my eyes desired; I refused my heart no pleasure. My heart took delight in all my work…. Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done and what I had toiled to achieve, everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind; nothing was gained under the sun” (Ecclesiastes 2:10-11). 

 

Wow! Clearly, the great king of Israel didn’t have the spiritual gift of encouragement. But after elaborating about how futile are many of the things we pursue so earnestly, he arrives at a reasonable conclusion: “So I commend the enjoyment of life, because nothing is better for a man under the sun than to eat and drink and be glad. Then joy will accompany him in his work all the days of the life God has given him under the sun” (Ecclesiastes 8:15).

 

What Solomon meant by this becomes clearer as we read the book of Proverbs, most of which he wrote. He speaks extensively about such things as discipline, hard work, wisdom, prudence, faithfulness, relationships, generosity, humility, honesty, integrity and right living. Maybe this wise man served as the inspiration for the list above.

 

As Solomon observed, “[God] has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men…” (Ecclesiastes 3:11). Another wise man, C.T. Studd, famously wrote, “Only one life, ‘twill soon be past. Only what’s done for Christ will last.” We could do worse than make these things the focus of our lives.