Better Than Butting Heads?

I don’t know about you, but the Presidential debates left me weary and frustrated. Articulate and well-rehearsed men aggressively engaged in verbal jousting, determinedly bent on asserting their superiority and subduing the opponent through the force of rhetoric. Frequently I felt the only thing that mattered during the debates wasn’t what was right, but whether the respective foes prevailed. Kind of reminded me of images I’ve seen of goats butting heads.

However, an illustration I came across recently offers a striking contrast. Years ago a man found himself involved in a heated dispute with another individual and was struggling to find a way for bringing the conflict to a mutually acceptable resolution. Then two goats on a mountainside showed the way.

Sometimes conflict resolution requires
no ifs, ands, or butts.

Pondering his dilemma one morning, the man noticed the goats approaching one another on a narrow path, one headed up and the other headed down. When they saw each other, they backed up and lowered their heads. It appeared they were about to charge. “This can’t be good,” the man thought, knowing butting heads on a precarious path at the edge of a mountain would be disastrous for one animal, and perhaps both.

What happened next was unexpected. The goat that stood lower on the path, the one that had been ascending, suddenly lay down, enabling the other to step over its back and proceed downward. Once the obstruction had passed, the upward-bound goat got on its feet and continued its climb.

Most likely it was an instinctive response, but the outcome was “win-win” for both of the goats. Neither got hurt; both got what they wanted.

Too often, whether in the workplace, the home, or even churches, we seem to lack that instinct. Convinced there is only one right way – “my way” – we run over or through whomever or whatever has the misfortune of getting in our way. If butting heads is what it takes, go for it.

The Scriptures, however, tell us there’s a better way. It often uses words like submit and subject to describe relationships in proper order. (Hint: The prefix “sub” implies being “under.” Just as a submarine goes under water, to submit or become subject to others means consciously and intentionally putting oneself under another.)

In 1 Peter 5:5-6, for example, younger people are told “be submissive to those who are older…clothe yourselves with humility toward one another.” And in general, we are to “submit to one another out of reverence for Christ” (Ephesians 5:21).

This notion, of course, doesn’t fly well in a “look out for No. 1” society, where everyone seems to be elbowing for an advantage. But as the goats demonstrated, often the path of least resistance is submission. Giving up our rights to be right in deference to the greater good.

Too bad politicians can’t seem to get that message.