Scanning the Headlines

Fast cash for fast cars. Porsche plans to produce a 918 Spyder hybrid supercar and make it available to consumers for a mere $630,000. For those who think that sounds a bit pricey, consider it will have a 500-horsepower engine, get 78 miles per gallon, and accelerate to 60 miles per hour in a mere 3.2 seconds.

I doubt I’ll shop for this particular model anytime soon. Not that it costs too much – one could save that much with excellent gas mileage, couldn’t one? No, I just don’t need a car that hits 60 mph in 3.2 seconds. It takes me that long to back out of my garage – and I don’t want to do it at 60 miles per hour!

And I don’t get many invitations to take a spin on the Daytona International Speedway or Talladega Superspeedway, so 500 horsepower under the hood wouldn’t be very practical. I could drive to Atlanta really fast, but why hurry to idle that many horses in a traffic jam once I get into the city? No, I’ll stick with your basic Toyota or Honda – and save a few shekels in the process, even if the gas mileage isn’t quite as good.

Typical date settings? As mentioned previously, I view “The Bachelor/Bachelorette” concept as ridiculous as any of the reality shows. But being a glutton for punishment, I sat with my wife to see how the most recent “Bachelorette” is winding down.

As I understand it, so far Ali and her testosterone-overloaded hunks have toured Turkey, Iceland, Tahiti, and now are wrapping up in Bora Bora. Yup, pretty much the same places I used to take my dates during my years as a single guy. Didn’t we all?

Poor Ali. Even though she had two very promising hunks falling all over themselves to win her affections, she had her heart broken. Surviving hubby candidate Frank stopped by the Le Taha’a Island Resort and Spa (remember the last time you were there?) for a few minutes to dump Ali in favor of an old girlfriend. Don’t you just hate when that happens – especially in Tahiti?

Anyway, the other guys – I think their names were Barney and Fred – had already pledged their eternal love, but being ditched by Frank was like a kick in the gut. Ali apparently was thinking, “I don’t want to be loved by some guys. I want to be loved by all of them!” Understandable, right?

Well, I won’t tune in to see the grand finale. I can’t take so much pain and angst – I might visit my dentist instead. And rumor has it that in the end, rather than choosing between Door #1 and Door #2, Ali decides it’s best to show them both the door.

The Scriptures tell us that love is patient and kind (1 Corinthians 13), but when it comes to lust – what “Bachelor/Bachelorette” are really all about – it doesn’t have to be either.

Is It Love – or Is It Lust, American Style?

Yesterday, America observed its annual tribute to love and romance: Valentine’s Day. As someone has said, it’s not an actual holiday because, “It’s not like we get the day off or anything!” But we either go out and enjoy nice dinners with our loved ones, or cook nice dinners and stay in, along with buying tokens of love like flowers, candy and jewelry.

Ah, love. Ain’t it grand?

On TV, however, we can experience what I have come to consider the anti-Valentine’s Day: ABC’s “The Bachelor.” This is the “reality show” where one guy gets to be fawned over by a couple of dozen attractive, shapely young ladies, each of whom is certain he is “the one” and, before the first show ends, Mr. Bachelor has surmised he’s “really falling” for at least half of them. Is it their minds – or ample cleavage – that convinced him?

There’s also “The Bachelorette” in which one gal gets fawned over by a couple of dozen attractive, shapely (er, muscular) young men. (Basically the same show, with less estrogen.) Either way, they sort of remind me of my first years in college, when I “fell in love” with a different coed every other week.

Warning: Don’t watch either show on a full stomach. If they were broadcast on Animal Planet, they’d be called “Dogs in Heat.”

What bothers me most about “The Bachelor” and its feminine counterpart – besides their being contrived and deftly edited to appear “real” – is they make a travesty of love, nothing but hormones gone wild, rather than the beautiful product of two people devoting themselves to one another “for better or for worse.”

1 Corinthians 13 equates love with patience, kindness, unselfishness, truthfulness, trust, hope and perseverance. It’s not the self-centered, lustful pursuit that “The Bachelor” would have us believe.