A friend called me, telling
about a new business venture he was planning. After he briefly outlined his
intentions, I asked whether he had done his “due diligence” in fully researching
this kind of enterprise. He assured me that he had and felt ready to proceed.
This wasn’t a field of
endeavor I knew anything about, but I had two other friends that I knew had run
similar businesses in the past. I suggested that my friend talk with them
before casting his plans in concrete, literally and figuratively. My desire
wasn’t to change his mind, but rather to ensure he had carefully examined all
aspects of his proposed enterprise to avoid the potential for unanticipated
problems in the future.
Decisions: What's really behind the door? |
Years ago I learned an
important principle of decision-making. In many instances we make our decisions
based on emotion, and then justify those decisions by gathering facts that
support the course of action we want to take. Sometimes this works, but other
times an emotions-first, facts-second approach can lead to disaster.
Have you heard the saying,
“How can it be wrong when it feels so right”? The problem is, feelings can and frequently
do cloud sound judgment. So how do we counter that? By seeking out advice and
wise counsel from people we trust – even those who won’t necessarily agree with
whatever we wish to do.
The book of Proverbs has much
to say on this topic. For instance, it states, “For lack of guidance a nation falls, but many advisers make victory
sure” (Proverbs 11:14). A similar passage tells us, “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed” (Proverbs
15:22).
Through the years I’ve
experienced the truth of these words in both positive and negative ways.
Determined to do things my way, I have either avoided asking others what they
thought, or chose only people who would “tickle my ears” and agree with my
foregone conclusions. Later I would discover, too late, what the Bible says
about this. Proverbs 12:15 asserts, “The
way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice.” In
some cases I’ve indeed taken “the way of a fool,” but experience and wisdom
have since taught me the importance of seeking and listening to advice.
Our decisions – especially
hasty ones – can be very easily justified and excused. “This is a once in a
lifetime opportunity, and if I don’t act now, I’ll miss out!” we reason. Or we
tell ourselves, “They don’t agree, but they just don’t understand.” But as the
Scriptures tell us, “He who trusts in
himself is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom is kept safe” (Proverbs
28:26).
“Walking in wisdom” can involve
being humble enough to consult with others wiser and more savvy than ourselves
– and willing to receive and seriously consider their counsel. Which is why
Proverbs 19:20 declares, “Listen to
advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise.” Looking at
the same question from the opposite angle, we’re told, “Stop listening to instruction, my son, and you will stray from the
words of knowledge” (Proverbs 19:27).
“Hindsight is 20:20,” the
familiar adage informs us. But one benefit of seeking wise counsel – especially
when pondering difficult, complex, even life-changing decisions – is that
others can offer their own hard-earned 20:20 hindsight without our having to
gain it through the pain of foolishness and failure.
It’s unhealthy to live in a
constant state of regret over wrong choices in the past, but it becomes much
easier when we minimize bad decisions. And one of the best ways to do that,
I’ve learned (often the hard way), is to “make
plans by seeking advice; if you wage war, obtain guidance” (Proverbs
20:18). That way, rather than having to devote much of our time to damage
control or suffering harsh consequences, we can instead enjoy the fruits of
making wise decisions that don’t need to be corrected later.
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