Why Submission Doesn’t Need to Be So Difficult

There’s a word in the Bible that tends to make the hair stand up on people’s necks. That word is: Submission. Because there’s something within each of us, no matter how old or young, that wants to respond, “Submit? Not me! No way!”

 

I’ve seen this exhibited in each of our children and grandchildren. As soon as they develop past the point of total dependence, they somehow arrive at the conclusion that they don’t have to do whatever mom or dad, or the grandparents say. Even when we’re clearly asking (or telling) them to do something that’s for their own good, they purse their lips, fold their arms or strike some other pose of defiance.

 

“Eat your food?” “No!” “It’s time to go to bed.” “No!” “Put that cookie down.” “No!” “Come here, put on this shirt (or dress or pair of pants).” “No!”  Believe me, we didn’t have to teach any of them to do that. They learned it all on their own.

 

It doesn’t get any better as we become teenagers or adults. The idea of submitting, whether to parents, teachers, bosses, law enforcement officers, or even the government, makes us cringe. As a result, we find the biblical commands to submit quite troublesome.

 

We find admonitions to submit to spiritual leaders: “Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to you” (Hebrews 13:17).

 

Then there’s the command, “Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God” (Romans 13:1). That’s a tough one, whether you’re a Democrat or Republican. But it’s affirmed in another passage: “Submit yourselves for the Lord’s sake to every human authority: whether to the emperor, as the supreme authority…” (1 Peter 2:13).

 

Submission in the realm of work is another biblical admonition: “Slaves, in reverent fear of God submit yourselves to your masters, not only to those who are good and considerate, but also to those who are harsh” (1 Peter 2:18). We might not be slaves is a literal sense, but it’s hard to submit to bosses when we’re treated like slaves, isn’t it?

 

Marriage isn’t excluded. In fact, for many this is the most problematic area of submission, since the Bible says, “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord” (Ephesians 5:22). Many wives read this and think, “You’ve got to be kidding. Submit to HIM?! Just as soon as they confirm that the moon’s made of gouda cheese!”

 

But did you know husbands are given a command that’s every bit as demanding, perhaps even more? Because a verse that follows says, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25). Consider the extent to which Jesus loved His Church, offering up His own life. 

 

And those verses directed toward husbands and wives are preceded by the admonition that we’re to “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ” (Ephesians 5:21).

 

Recently I heard a speaker offer a helpful insight into this matter of submitting. He pointed out that ultimately this means being willing to subordinate oneself to a common mission – sub-mission. 

 

Think of a football team as an example, since that’s the particular sports season we’re in at the moment. The goal of each member of the team is to move the ball down the field and score points, while keeping the opposing team from doing the same.  The center can’t decide, “I’m sick and tired of hiking the ball to the quarterback!” And other offensive linemen can’t stop doing their jobs because, “It’s not fair that the running backs and wide receivers get all the glory!” 

 

No, they all willingly – and eagerly – perform their specific assignments because they’re united in a common mission: Outscoring the opponent and winning the game. To submit to one another in that sense does not diminish the importance or value of each. Because when one or more fail to do their jobs, their combined mission is unsuccessful.

 

As followers of Jesus Christ, we shouldn’t step back in resistance when it’s time to submit to one another. Because ultimately, our mission is to glorify God and advance the work of His kingdom on earth – with a look toward the “new heaven and a new earth,” as described in Revelation 21:1 and 2 Peter 3:13.

 

With these things in mind, we can “Submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you…” (James 4:7-8).

 

Romans 12:1-2 does not include the word “submit,” but it’s implied: “Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.”

Instead of singing, as Frank Sinatra did, “I did it my way,” we understand that it’s better, more joyous and more fulfilling to do it God’s way – even if it means submitting. 

Better Than Butting Heads?

I don’t know about you, but the Presidential debates left me weary and frustrated. Articulate and well-rehearsed men aggressively engaged in verbal jousting, determinedly bent on asserting their superiority and subduing the opponent through the force of rhetoric. Frequently I felt the only thing that mattered during the debates wasn’t what was right, but whether the respective foes prevailed. Kind of reminded me of images I’ve seen of goats butting heads.

However, an illustration I came across recently offers a striking contrast. Years ago a man found himself involved in a heated dispute with another individual and was struggling to find a way for bringing the conflict to a mutually acceptable resolution. Then two goats on a mountainside showed the way.

Sometimes conflict resolution requires
no ifs, ands, or butts.

Pondering his dilemma one morning, the man noticed the goats approaching one another on a narrow path, one headed up and the other headed down. When they saw each other, they backed up and lowered their heads. It appeared they were about to charge. “This can’t be good,” the man thought, knowing butting heads on a precarious path at the edge of a mountain would be disastrous for one animal, and perhaps both.

What happened next was unexpected. The goat that stood lower on the path, the one that had been ascending, suddenly lay down, enabling the other to step over its back and proceed downward. Once the obstruction had passed, the upward-bound goat got on its feet and continued its climb.

Most likely it was an instinctive response, but the outcome was “win-win” for both of the goats. Neither got hurt; both got what they wanted.

Too often, whether in the workplace, the home, or even churches, we seem to lack that instinct. Convinced there is only one right way – “my way” – we run over or through whomever or whatever has the misfortune of getting in our way. If butting heads is what it takes, go for it.

The Scriptures, however, tell us there’s a better way. It often uses words like submit and subject to describe relationships in proper order. (Hint: The prefix “sub” implies being “under.” Just as a submarine goes under water, to submit or become subject to others means consciously and intentionally putting oneself under another.)

In 1 Peter 5:5-6, for example, younger people are told “be submissive to those who are older…clothe yourselves with humility toward one another.” And in general, we are to “submit to one another out of reverence for Christ” (Ephesians 5:21).

This notion, of course, doesn’t fly well in a “look out for No. 1” society, where everyone seems to be elbowing for an advantage. But as the goats demonstrated, often the path of least resistance is submission. Giving up our rights to be right in deference to the greater good.

Too bad politicians can’t seem to get that message.