What Motivates You?

When was the last time you heard a motivational talk? Maybe it was in your church. Or perhaps at a gathering where some eloquent and accomplished speaker addressed the audience with such fervor, some people didn’t need to exit via the doors. They were ready to run through walls, they were so psyched up.

Years ago, I attended one of those multi-level sales meetings where men and women shared their glowing success stories and got many of the attendees fired up. I wasn’t one of them, but I must admit, their stories sounded convincing.

Lots of men and women have forged lucrative careers as motivational speakers, and some have supplemented their incomes with books capturing their inspiring messages. In many cases, what they have to say is good. It’s drawn from their own experience, and others benefit from hearing about what they’ve learned through the process of hard work, determination, trial and error.

Unfortunately, such external motivation doesn’t last all that long. I think of the popular Promise Keepers conferences of years ago. Thousands upon thousands of men would gather together for a couple of days, basically listening to a series of “Win One for the Gipper” speeches, only with a decidedly spiritual twist. I attended one in Atlanta, and a lot of what we heard was very good. But a week or two later, guys I went with were kind of scratching their heads and thinking, “Now, what was it I was so excited about at that conference?”

Because being motivated that way is like attending a football pep rally. Everyone’s excited, the team is pumped, and we’re all convinced our guys are going to score a resounding victory. Then comes the kickoff, however, the game is on, and we discover heightened emotions won’t be enough to win the day.

Which leads us to an important question: What motivates you? Experts tell us motivation drives basically everything we do, whether it’s extrinsic motivation – to achieve something or attain a goal, or intrinsic – being motivated internally for some form of personal fulfillment.

I think of a friend who many years ago started a ministry aimed at a very difficult segment of society. Some of us who knew him wondered how long he would stick with it, considering the many challenges, obstacles and disappointments he was bound to encounter. About 40 years later, he’s still involved with the same work.

So, what is it that undergirds some people’s well-intended initial commitments and enables them to endure and persevere over a long haul while so many others start well but fizzle out after a relatively short period of time? What keeps them motivated?

For followers of Jesus Christ, the answer can be summarized by a simple sentence: “For Christ’s love compels us” (2 Corinthians 5:14). The apostle Paul wrote this within a context of explaining his motivation for sharing the good news of Christ to any and all that he encountered. The love Jesus had shown to him, and Jesus’ love being manifested through him to others. This should serve as the motivation for everything we do.

In the same passage, Paul wrote, “If we are out of our mind, it is for the sake of God; if we are in our right mind, it is for you…because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died. And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again” (2 Corinthians 5:13-15).

He concludes this section by declaring, “We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God” (2 Corinthians 5:20). As we go through each day – whether it’s at work, interacting with neighbors, attending a school PTA meeting, even at the local mall – we should never forget that we are ambassadors for Jesus Christ.

Colossians 3:23 offers this motivation: “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men.” Like most writers, many times I don’t receive a lot of feedback on what I write, whether it’s a book, an article, or one of these blog posts. It’s not uncommon for any writer to wonder, “Why am I doing this? Does anyone care? Is it making any difference?”

For me, it’s important to keep in the forefront of my mind that I’m compelled by Christ’s love for me, along with the love He’s given me for others, as well as the awareness that ultimately whatever I do is for an audience of One. Then I have the clear answer for the “why” of what I do, along with being assured as the Lord is guiding me, I’m making a difference in one way or another.

This understanding should serve as strong, unwavering motivation for us all. Even in times of uncertainty or discouragement, we have the assurance to “be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that your toil is not in vain in the Lord” (1 Corinthians 15:58).

Never Look a Gift Card in the Mouth

Do you know the most profitable items any retail store can sell? They’re probably gift cards, because often they’re never redeemed. Someone has handed over a chunk of cash to buy someone else a gift they’ll not receive.

It’s estimated that between eight and 10 percent of gift cards go unredeemed. They’re stashed in wallets and forgotten, hidden in drawers, or disposed of accidentally. Every year more than $1 billion in gift cards go unused. That’s a lot of Starbucks coffee, iTunes music and Walmart merchandise never claimed!

Gift cards are valuable - but only if they're used.

Even though we live in a consumer-oriented society, this doesn’t surprise me. I just checked, and I’ve got several unused or only partially used gift cards. They’re nice to have, but sometimes we lose track of them. Out of sight, out of mind. (However, now that I’ve reminded myself, I plan to use them before they slip my mind again.)

One good thing about a forgotten gift card is stumbling across it. It’s like finding buried treasure. It was there all the time; we just didn’t realize it.

You know what’s worse than unexpended gift cards? Unclaimed or unused gifts from God. In the Scriptures, we read about the gift of salvation, His assurance of eternal life: “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is a gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast” (Ephesians 2:8-9).

The apostle Paul wrote to believers in the ancient city of Corinth, “Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift!” (2 Corinthians 9:15). Elsewhere he writes about “God’s grace and the gift that came by the grace of the one man, Jesus Christ…” (Romans 5:15).

Unfortunately, this priceless gift is too often treated like a retail gift card that’s been cast aside. People never tap into its potential value, either through ignorance (they don’t know it’s available), neglect (they’ve forgotten about it), or denial (they choose not to receive the gift to apply it to their credit).

What’s exciting is when an individual does discover this gift, at last understanding its worth and eagerly receiving all it entails. It’s that “Wow!” moment many of us still remember, the start of a transformed life we could never have imagined. Much better than finding a long-forgotten gift card neatly tucked away in the sock drawer!

Salvation – once-and-for-all forgiveness, and the promise of life eternal – isn’t the only gift the Scriptures tell us is available. We read also about spiritual gifts, enumerated in Romans 12, 1 Corinthians 12, and other passages. These include the gifts of leadership, teaching, mercy, faith, encouragement, giving, serving, and others. We’re told every follower of Christ has at least one spiritual gift, intended to complement the work and service of other members of God’s family, just as the organs of a human body function together in harmony to promote health.

Similar to gift cards, however, the availability of spiritual gifts doesn’t guarantee their usefulness. For this reason, Paul repeatedly exhorted his protégé, Timothy, to be a faithful steward of what God had given him. He wrote, “Do not neglect the spiritual gift within you, which was bestowed on you through prophetic utterance with the laying on of hands by the presbytery [elders of the church]” (1 Timothy 4:14).

In a second letter to Timothy, Paul repeated the challenge: “For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands (2 Timothy 1:6). Recipients of the Lord's gifts, we’re to put them into use, making them even more fruitful through practice.

Failing to utilize a gift card is a sad waste, both for the giver and the recipient. Failure to receive God’s far more precious gift – “…the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 6:23) – as well as the spiritual gifts He entrusts to us to serve in advancing His purposes on earth, is worse than a waste. It’s a tragedy beyond words.

Five Stages of Marriage – and Faith

Years ago, I heard someone make an astute observation about marriage. The speaker stated even the most successful marriages typically move through five stages: infatuation, disillusionment, misery, acceptance, and true love.

There’s much wisdom in this assessment. On wedding day, both bride and groom arrive starry-eyed, convinced the ceremony’s just the start of perpetual, uninterrupted bliss. They see one another as the answer to their prayers, fulfillment of their dreams, the person to meet all their needs. This marks the “infatuation” stage. It might last through the honeymoon, maybe weeks or months more.

Inevitably the initial stage ends and “disillusionment” arrives. They discover their new mate isn’t so perfect after all, and what’s worse, they have no desire to be fulfiller of the other’s dreams. The marriage isn’t bad, but visions of perfection are forever shattered.

Next comes the “misery” stage, when memories of “I do” turn into “I did? Why?!” They begin wondering, “Who is this person I married?” Bliss becomes a distant memory. Thoughts of the relationship continuing into perpetuity cease to be pleasant. It seems more of a lifetime sentence.

Often marriages never escape this stage. Couples either grin and bear it, or reach a point when divorce seems inevitable. However, if willing to persevere – aided by the grace and strength of God – things start to improve, advancing to “acceptance.” Virtually every marriage spanning several decades has managed to endure the journey to acceptance. It’s the realization that when the words “better or worse” were uttered, there actually would be some worse times, but in hindsight, they weren’t as bad as they seemed at the time.

Happily, many whose marriages have spanned 30, 40, or even 50 years or more discover the “true love” stage is by far the best. And well worth the wait. It’s the love described in 1 Corinthians 13 – the patient, kind, humble, selfless, slow-to-anger, forgiving, honest, protective, trusting, ever hopeful and persevering kind that rarely if ever is portrayed on TV or the movie screen.

I cite this not as a marriage authority, although having been married to the same woman for more than 40 years, I’ve learned a lot. No, these five stages of marriage are important because in a sense, they parallel the stages of spiritual growth.

We could describe the first stage of faith in Christ as infatuation, the giddy sense of excitement that is centered on feelings, the unwavering conviction that from now on, it’s “me and Jesus all the way!”

It may take months or even a few years, but that childlike zeal segues into disillusionment. We realize God isn’t a divine sugar daddy who answers all our prayers the way we ask. He allows hardships, pain, and even loss to enter our lives. We don’t understand why.

Then comes the time of misery, when questions and doubts emerge. This prompts us to dig deep, asking ourselves what we really believe – and why. In best-case scenarios, we come through this process with faith stronger than ever, not necessarily having every question answered, but with a greater trust in a transcendent God who’s not unsettled by our uncertainties.

Acceptance, in our faith journey, involves being able to trust that although we won’t always know why the Lord does what He does – or when or how – we’re in this for the long haul, sharing the confidence of the prophet who wrote, “So do not fear, for I am with you, do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand” (Isaiah 41:10).

Finally, our goal as followers of Jesus should be the true love stage, recognizing, “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because he first loved us” (1 John 4:18-19). This is what God desires for each one of us.

As with couples in marriage, believers do not arrive at this last stage in their faith walk quickly, or easily. But it’s well worth the travail to get there.

Romans 5:3-6 declares, “And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.”

It’s a long, convoluted, sometimes seemingly impossible path for faith to travel from infatuation to true love. But as Jesus said, in a slightly different context, “With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God” (Mark 10:27).