We Shouldn’t Underestimate the Importance of the Father

We’re on the cusp of another Father’s Day, a holiday which in the minds of many ranks a distant second to Mother’s Day. And this might be fitting, I suppose, because unless a child is adopted, the mom has had a nine-month head start in building a relationship with young Buddy or Bunny.

When a youngster falls and skins his or her knee, the first word from their mouth is usually, “Mommy!” Also, even though I haven’t seen it as much lately, I recall many televised college football games when, as the camera panned the sideline, players would turn to say, “Hi, Mom!” I can’t remember a single “Hi, Dad!” If Mom and Dad were both running for President, Mom would probably win in a landslide.

 

Nevertheless, Father’s Day is a noteworthy holiday, perhaps one that deserves more attention. I did a little research and found that more than 23 million children in the United States live in single-parent families. And of those, more than 14 million are living in mother-only households. I also learned that one out of every 14 children being raised by grandparents, meaning neither the mother or father is actively involved in the child’s daily life.

 

I have every respect for single moms, most of whom do an incredible job in trying to earn money for food, clothes, someplace to live and other necessities, along with trying to do a job of parenting that was intended from the start to be handled by two people. 

 

As King Solomon wisely observed, “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work; if one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10). And sometimes stumbling and falling, making mistakes, is one of the literal pitfalls of parenting.

 

Some factions in society today would minimize the importance of the father, citing glowing examples of single moms who are doing quite well by themselves. But studies have shown children growing up in single-parent homes face a number of disadvantages. They’re far more likely to grow up in poverty, which typically leads to a host of physical, mental and behavioral health problems. Many children have to cope with the stresses of family instability, and the list of challenges could go on. 

 

But most important is the emphasis God in the Scriptures places on the importance of the father. While the Bible teaches both father and mother have equal value, it calls for the father to serve in primary teaching and disciplinary roles. For instance, “The Lord disciplines the one He loves, as does a father the son in whom he delights” (Proverbs 3:12).

 

This idea is carried into the New Testament, where we read, “Our fathers disciplined us for a short time as they thought best, but God disciplines us for our good, in order that we may share in His holiness” (Hebrews 12:10).

 

At the same time, fathers are warned against being harsh or too demanding. The apostle Paul expresses this in several instances, including Ephesians 6:4, “Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” Also in Colossians 3:21, “Fathers, do not embitter [provoke or aggravate] your children, or they will become discouraged.” 

 

Paul affirms the roles of both mother and father in the second of his letters to the ancient church of Thessalonica, drawing examples from parenting to describe his own relationship to the believers there: “…but we were gentle among you, like a mother caring for her little children…. For you know that we dealt with each of you as a father deals with his own children, encouraging, comforting and urging you to live lives worthy of God” (1 Thessalonians 2:7,11-12).

 

We find the father’s responsibility as teacher underscored in Deuteronomy 6:5-7. The head of the family is instructed, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.” We simply can’t ignore the importance given to fathers in the Scriptures as being fundamental to the family and social structure. 

 

In the Bible, God is always referred to as Father, including in Jesus’ model prayer (also known as the Lord’s prayer): “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be Your name…” (Matthew 6:9). Paul also wrote, “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort…” (2 Corinthians 1:3).

 

I hope this serves as an encouragement to all who read this, especially for dads, fully knowing their job isn’t easy. The way God created men and women, mothers as a rule are more nurturing, perhaps more sensitive and emotionally supportive. I know it’s been a stretch for me at times in helping to raise our children. I’ve made many mistakes and even now I struggle to get things right with our adult children – and their children. But we’re an important part of the overall equation; our role didn’t end with the moment of conception.

 

So, this Father’s Day, let’s give a shout out to all the dads out there, sometimes stumbling and fumbling along, but invaluable to the process of raising children to become responsible, productive, God-fearing adults.

Spiritual Growth – A Matter of Inflow and Outflow

Growth in the natural realm can be a bit of a mystery. Take a boy for an example: As an adolescent he may be one of the shorter members of his class; then he hits the teenage years and shoots up 5-6 inches within just a few months. “What have you been feeding that kid?” friends might ask.

 

Or planting a garden, cultivating the ground and sowing seeds you hope will supply you with vegetables throughout the summer. For a while it might appear that nothing is happening – other than the growth of some pesky weeds. Then suddenly you see some sprouts, and within a matter of a few weeks you’ve got your own personal farm. How this growth occurs seems a bit mysterious; nature seems to work according to its own schedule.

 

Spiritual growth might be perceived as similarly mysterious. Some people seem to have a close walk with God, possessing a clear understanding of what the Scriptures teach and living it out every day in a fairly consistent manner. Meanwhile others are just muddling along. They attend worship services, may be part of a small group, even read their Bibles, but their growth seems stagnant or stunted.

 

What’s the difference?

 

It’s not such a great mystery. In presenting what’s sometimes known as the “parable of the shrewd manager,” Jesus Christ indicated it’s a simple matter of being faithful to use what we already have, whether it’s a little or a lot. He stated, “Whoever is faithful with very little will also be faithful with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much. So if you have not been faithful with worldly wealth, who can entrust you with true riches?” (Luke 9-11).

 

On the face of it, this is a teaching about stewardship of money and material riches. But as Jesus said, it also applies to “true riches” – eternal, heavenly treasures of which He said at another time, “where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal” (Matthew 6:20).

 

What does it mean, as another translation expresses it, that “If you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones”? One thing it means is that if we are not willing to use and put into practice the spiritual truths and ‘riches’ God entrusts to us, He’s not inclined to provide us with more. Why should He give us more if we’re wasting what we already have?

 

There’s an encounter early in Jesus’ earthly ministry that seems to illustrate this. Speaking to a woman at a well outside the Samaritan city of Sychar, Jesus made this astonishing declaration after He had asked her to give Him a drink from the well: 

“If you knew the gift of God, and who is saying to you, ‘Give Me a drink,’ you would ask Him, and He would give you living water.” A bit later in this spontaneous conversation, He asserted, “…whoever drinks from the water that I will give him will never get thirsty again…the water I will give him will become a well of water springing up within him for eternal life” (John 4:7-14).

 

Initially, the woman had understood Him to be referring to actual water, good ole H2O. Then she realized the conversation had taken a spiritual turn. He was offering her “living water…springing up within for eternal life.” This evokes the image of a spring of water bubbling up and flowing outward, accessible to anyone who wants it.

 

Commenting on this passage, devotional writer Selwyn Hughes posed this question: “Do fresh springs flow out of us day after day? If not, why not? The answer is simple – there can be no outflow unless there is an inflow. This is the rhythm of the Holy Spirit – intake and outflow. If there is more intake than outflow, then the intake stops; if there is more outflow than intake, then the outflow stops.”

 

For years I’ve referred to this as “God’s Spiritual Sponge Principle.” Just like an actual sponge that’s become saturated must be squeezed out before it can soak up more liquid, as ‘spiritual sponges’ we’re allowed by God to absorb only as much of His truth as we’re willing to put to use in our everyday lives.

 

I like how Philemon 6 is expressed in an older edition of the NIV: “I pray that you may be active in sharing your faith, so that you will have a full understanding of every good thing we have in Christ.”

 

This doesn’t mean we need to grab our Bibles, find a street corner somewhere and start preaching from it to everyone who passes by. (Although it could, if God were to lead someone in that way.) But as 1 Peter 3:15 instructs, we’re to “Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.”

 

Another verse says every believer should be willing to “Preach the word, be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage – with great patience and careful instruction” (1 Timothy 4:2).

 

‘But I’m not ready. I don’t know enough yet,’ someone might be thinking. Maybe that’s because that person hasn’t been faithful to share whatever biblical truth and understanding the Lord has already provided. As Philemon 6 suggests, as we’re “active in sharing [our] faith,” then we’re able to gain “a full understanding of every good thing we have in Christ.” And as we learn more, we become better equipped to communicate what we believe.

 

Years ago, I had been trying to memorize a particularly lengthy Bible verse but couldn’t retain some portions of it. Then I decided to read and share it with someone I worked with – a non-believer. I didn’t do so to proselytize but figured it wouldn’t hurt for him to hear it. Before long, I found I could recite the passage verbatim; I’ve talked about it with other people many times since.

 

There are many ways of sharing our faith beyond personal evangelism. Talking about God’s Word with family members at home. Or telling our small group what a certain passage has meant to us. In a discipling or spiritual mentoring relationship, we’re doing the same when discussing the meaning and application of a specific verses or section of Scripture.

 

Any time we chat with others about what the Lord has been teaching us, or how He’s been working in our lives, it’s an opportunity to ‘squeeze our spiritual sponge,’ making room for God to entrust us with more of His “true riches.” Balancing the inflow and outflow.

What’s Your Logo, Your Trademark, Your Brand?

These days companies and corporations are all about their “brand” – features and imagery that come to the minds of consumers and clients upon hearing their name. For example, Coca-Cola, Apple, Disney and Southwest Airlines – we hear those names and instantly thoughts about them come to mind. Even some celebrated individuals are known for their brand – think about icons like Taylor Swift or Michael Jordan, Tom Cruise or Oprah Winfrey, Elon Musk or Bill Gates. The mere mention of their names conjures up a variety of images and impressions. 

Have you ever considered that you, too, have a “brand” that other people associate with you?

 

Some time ago I came across an intriguing quote from Jay Danzie, a “brand strategist and mindset coach.” He said, “Your smile is your logo, your personality is your business card, how you leave others feeling after an experience with you becomes your trademark, and whether others aspire to be like you is your brand.”

 

These terms would seem to apply best to public figures, as well as those who populate the business and professional world, but it’s not much of a stretch to realize they can apply to each of us as well. We all have a smile (or should have); a personality; leave others with impressions (good or bad) after they meet us; and ideally, we’re the types of people that some might aspire to be like.

 

Granted, there are those who seem to have an edge, possessing inherent qualities that are just part of who they are. For instance, those whose smiles seem to brighten a room the moment they enter. Or individuals who exude energy and personality, becoming the ‘life of the party’ wherever they go. 

 

Even though most of us don’t fit those descriptions, that doesn’t excuse or exempt us from having a logo, trademark, or brand-like impact on the people we encounter every day, whether at work, school, church, our neighborhoods, or even at the grocery store. In fact, the Scriptures strongly affirm this in principle. Let’s take a quick look:

 

Smile. Have you ever had one of those days when everything seemed to go wrong, received some bad news, or just found yourself feeling glum, only to have your negative emotions dispelled by someone looking straight at you with a cheery smile? We can have this same impact on others if we’re not too preoccupied with ourselves. Proverbs 15:30 says, “A cheerful look brings joy to the heart, and good news gives health to the bones.” Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to try making a friendly smile our ‘logo.’

 

Personality. Not everyone has an effervescent personality (I know I don’t), but we can strive to be or become the types of individuals that folks enjoy being around. Do we tend to gossip, disparage others, or create friction whenever we’re around others? That’s not the way to win friends and influence people, as Dale Carnegie used to say. Living in the midst of a sea of negativity, people are drawn to those known for their positive attitudes, both through words and actions.

 

Proverbs 16:24 observes, “Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.” This doesn’t mean we’re called to become Pollyannas, oblivious to the realities of the world. But we don’t need to remind others about them either. Ephesians 4:29 admonishes, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” 

 

Impression. Much of the impact we make as individuals is determined by our inner selves The first part of Proverbs 23:7 declares, “As he thinks within himself, so he is.” Another translation says, “For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.” Like it or not, what’s in our hearts has a way of oozing outwardly. 

 

How can we address this to create the best ‘trademark’? As the apostle Paul exhorted fellow believers, “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things” (Philippians 4:8). Keep our minds in the right places.

 

Example. Do you think your ‘brand’ is one that others seek to emulate? Maybe – or maybe not. But according to the Scriptures, this is a worthwhile goal. Imperfect as he was by his own admission, Paul understood this. To brothers and sisters in Christ he offered this challenge: “Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me – put into practice. And the God of peace will be with you” (Philippians 4:9).

 

And writing to believers in Corinth, he boldly stated, “Even though you have ten thousand guardians in Christ, you do not have many fathers, for in Christ Jesus I became your father through the gospel. Therefore, I urge you to imitate me…. [my protégé Timothy] will remind you of my way of life in Christ Jesus, which agrees with what I teach everywhere in every church” (1 Corinthians 4:15-17).

 

In the same letter, Paul instructed them to, “Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ” (1 Corinthians 11:1). He wasn’t writing this boastfully. The apostle was simply confident that “in Christ” his life was consistent, worth aspiring to be like.

 

For those of us desiring to have personal brands, trademarks and logos that honor our Lord, Jesus told succinctly how to go about it. In answer to the question, “Teacher, which command is the greatest in the Law?,” He responded, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind’…. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself’” (Matthew 22:36-39).

 

If we endeavor, through the power of God’s Spirit, to heed those two commandments, we should have no worries about our ‘brand.’

Sometimes 'PTSD' Can Be Turned into 'PTG'

Stand-up comedian George Carlin died in 2008, but some of his monologues have amazing staying power. His frequent use of profanity in his commentaries turned off some of his listeners, but he had a way of looking at the ordinary and providing extraordinary insights through humor. 

One routine I recall was about the psychological and emotional damage many soldiers have endured due to wartime experiences. Carlin observed that curiously over the years discussing the malady has become more complex, both its diagnosis and the terminology used to describe it.

 

During World War I, soldiers returning from battle often suffered from “Shell Shock” – a condition summed up in two words of one syllable each. Then came World War II, with combatants dealing with similar issues, except it was then termed “Battle Fatigue.” Still two words, but both containing two syllables. 

 

Since the Vietnam War, however, the situation has risen to new levels of sophistication, as its new name would suggest: “Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder” (PTSD). As Carlin noted, it now consists of four words and eight syllables. It’s also being used to define other forms of trauma – such as car accidents, acts of terrorism, witnessing acts of violence, first-responders dealing with the aftermath of horrific emergencies, and natural disasters.

 

It wasn’t Carlin’s intent, nor is it mine, to minimize the dreadful impact of PTSD. My father served in World War II, was wounded twice, and I suspect he suffered from PTSD, judging from the nights he would cry out in his sleep because of nightmares. And I have a good friend who has founded an amazing ministry devoted to serving veterans dealing with the effects of PTSD, having experienced it firsthand himself.

 

But recently I heard someone speak of a different possible outcome for those experiencing trauma and severe trials of one kind or another. It’s called PTG – Post-Traumatic Growth.

 

Have you ever gone through an extremely difficult time – overwhelming challenges at work; dire financial problems; a frightening health diagnosis, or family crisis – that seemed more than you could bear? At the time those circumstances might have seemed hopeless, but weeks or months, maybe years later, they proved to be significant for your personal growth? 

Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn was a Nobel Prize-winning Russian writer and dissident who endured the horrors of the Soviet prison system. In his book, The Gulag Archipelago, he wrote, “Bless you prison, bless you for being in my life. For there, lying upon the rotting prison straw, I came to realize that the object of life is not prosperity as we are made to believe, but the maturity of the human soul.” 

Along with being able to raise global awareness of the great political repression in the then-Soviet Union, Solzhenitsyn also came to faith in Jesus Christ. We could say his years of personal trauma were turned into post-traumatic growth.

 

We can find no better example of this than the apostle Paul. In a letter to followers of Jesus in ancient Corinth, Paul wrote about the many hardships he suffered in seeking to advance the Gospel, including imprisonments and floggings:

“…Five times I received from the Jews the forty lashes minus one. Three times I was beaten with rods, once I was stoned, three times I was shipwrecked, I spent a night and a day in the open sea…. I have been in danger from rivers…bandits…my own countrymen …. I have labored and toiled and have often gone without sleep; I have known hunger and thirst and have often gone without food; I have been cold and naked” (2 Corinthians 11:23-27).

 

And we think we’ve had it rough! But this same person who knew adversity in so many shapes and forms could also write, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called to His purpose” (Romans 8:28).

 

Many of us have heard this verse. Maybe so often that it rolls right off our tongues. But do we really believe it? “All things”? “For good”? Well, that’s what it says – what God says.

 

Our pastor recently observed that some people willingly – and intentionally – invite pain in the anticipation of good outcomes, perhaps their own version of post-traumatic growth. Who are these crazy folks? Marathon runners. Or if you prefer, triathletes. Not only do they go through many months of grueling training and preparation, but also the competitive events themselves, whether it’s enduring mile after mile of a 26-mile marathon or the combined swimming, biking and running phases of the triathlon.

 

Applying this to spiritual growth, we’d be wise to heed Solzhenitsyn’s words, “the object of life is not prosperity as we are made to believe, but the maturity of the human soul.” 

 

This life, in terms of eternity, passes like the blink of an eye. For that reason, it’s important to maintain our focus on what lies ahead. As Paul wrote, “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:38-39).

 

Trusting that God truly has a purpose behind our trials, tribulations and traumas, we can use them to turn PTSD into PTG.

How to Get a Grip on the Scriptures

“Get a grip!” Many people use this phrase, meaning to get control of oneself or to not get so worked up about something. Can’t stop complaining about things happening in your life? ‘Get a grip!’ If watching the news makes you depressed, ‘Get a grip!’ Consumed with envy over what other people have? ‘Get a grip!’

But there are other, broader senses of that phrase. The most obvious would apply to people who work with their hands, like carpenters, plumbers, or artists. If using a hammer, wrench, or paintbrush, you better ‘get a grip’ if you’re going to accomplish whatever you’re trying to do. When I was taking drum lessons, I discovered ‘getting a grip’ was easier said than done – trying to move quickly around the drum kit, occasionally a drumstick would slip out of my hands.

 

Of even greater importance is getting a grip on a particular pursuit, achieving a measure of mastery in a chosen skill or discipline. I admire people demonstrating great expertise at whatever they do, whether it’s interior design, accounting, teaching, genealogy, mechanics, culinary arts, or other such vocational or avocational interests. But they didn’t achieve their excellence overnight; it took countless hours to ‘get a grip’ – to master what they desired to do.

 

The same holds true in a spiritual sense. For instance, gaining a deep understanding of the Scriptures isn’t something that can be achieved by spending a few minutes now and then. The typical Bible has more than 1,500 pages – the truths they contain are deep enough to fill the lifetime of even the most determined theologian.

 

That doesn’t mean biblical teachings are unfathomable for the ‘layman,’ someone who has never darkened the halls of a seminary, much less preached from a pulpit. To get a grip on the Scriptures, all we need to do is look at our hands. 

 

As I’ve mentioned before, my journey as a disciple of Jesus Christ began years ago when I joined a small group that used study materials developed by The Navigators. Originally focused on ministering to people in the armed forces, the Navs eventually expanded to college campuses and churches. One strategy for teaching how to get a grip on the Bible was what they called “the hand illustration.”

Why the hand? Pick up a Bible with one hand. Then transfer it to your other hand but try holding it only with your little finger. It’ll fall, right? Attempt this again, using only your little finger and thumb. Your grip on the book is tenuous; it can easily be pulled from your grasp. Add a third finger, then a fourth, and finally all five. Now you’ll have a strong grip on the Bible – someone would have a hard time wresting it out of your hand.

 

In a similar sense, it requires five ‘fingers’ to gain a strong grip on God’s Word. Each finger on the hand represents an action step for internalizing the Scriptures and learning how to put the truths and principles into use. The five are to: hear, read, study, memorize, and meditate.

 

Hear. It starts with hearing, whether a sermon at church, a message at a conference, a program on the radio, or even a conversation with a follower of Jesus. As Romans 10:17 explains, “Consequently, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word of Christ.”

 

Read. Next comes reading the Scriptures for yourself, seeking to learn who God is and the truths He reveals through His Word. “Blessed is the one who read the words of the prophecy, and blessed are those who hear it and take to heart what is written in it…” (Revelation 1:3).

 

Study. The third ‘finger’ in this process is studying – when the hard work really begins. It’s more than just reading what the Bible says. It’s digging, seeking to understand its meaning and discover treasures it contains for today and for eternity. In Acts 17:11 we see an example: “Now the Bereans were of more noble character than the Thessalonians, for they received the message with great eagerness and examined the Scriptures every day to see if what Paul said was true.” We’re to be like the diligent, studious Bereans.

 

Memorize. When we encounter especially meaningful verses or passages in the Bible, one of the best ways for internalizing them is to commit them to memory. Then, like building a spiritual filing cabinet, they’re accessible for use without having to open a Bible. Deuteronomy 6:6-7 says they’re to become such a part of us they work themselves into everyday conversations: “These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.” 

 

Another passage that affirms Scripture memorization is Psalm 119:9,11 in which King David says, “How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to Your word…. I have hidden Your word in my heart that I might not sin against You.”

 

Meditate. Finally, we have meditation. This isn’t mindless repetition of some mystical mantra, or emptying one’s mind. It’s deeply pondering a specific passage, striving to draw as much insight and understanding from it as you can. Kind of like a cow chewing its cud over and over, seeking to get as much nutrition out of it as possible. This is addressed in Psalm 1:2, which describes a “blessed” man whose “delight is in the law of the Lord, and on His law he meditates day and night.”

 

Do you desire to get a grip on the Word of God, to become a ‘person of the Book’? Then make every effort to hear, read, study, memorize, and meditate. Over time you’ll find the truths of the Scriptures becoming part of you more and more.

Easily Deceived by Outward Appearances

We’re a society obsessed by outward appearances. When planning to go to a special event, many people agonize over what to wear and how they’ll look. On home improvement shows, the first thing prospective buyers consider is “curb appeal.” And those ‘reality’ romance shows? Only for the beautiful or handsome. Our eyes are attracted to whatever shiny, glitzy thing comes along. 

But have you ever discovered how outward appearances can deceive? For instance, that person who catches everyone’s attention when he or she walks into a room, but if you get a chance to talk with them beyond a casual ‘hello,’ you discover they’re either filled with ego or have the IQ of a mushroom. Beware of flashy ‘diamonds’ that turn out to be synthetic.

 

Over the years I’ve had the opportunity to get acquainted with people who could command a speaking platform with their wit and eloquence. However, sometimes what you see isn’t what you get if you have a chance to talk with them one-to-one. Stage presence doesn’t always translate into personal substance.

 

Other times I’ve met people who at first didn’t seem outwardly impressive, but they possessed inner qualities that drew me to them like a magnet. They serve as reminders not to judge people solely upon externals. As God told the prophet Samuel, “The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart” (1 Samuel 16:7).

 

Among the endearing realities of the Bible is its candor, revealing people as they truly were. Repeatedly we find examples of folks in the Bible whose outward appearance didn’t align with the kinds of people they were on the inside.

 

Recently, while using a one-year Bible that takes the reader through the Scriptures in a calendar year, with both Old and New Testament readings, I came across two examples of how we can be deceived by outward appearances. The first was King Saul.

 

Reading in 1 Samuel, we find the people of Israel had tired of being led by prophetic judges. "Give us a king to lead us…. We want a king over us,” they declared to the prophet Samuel (1 Samuel 8:6,19). After all, the Israelites reasoned, other nations all had kings. Why shouldn’t they? So, God told Samuel to anoint a fellow named Saul, “an impressive young man without equal among the Israelites – a head taller than any of the others” (1 Samuel 9:2). He seemed outstanding – in the most literal sense.

 

Saul had passed the ‘look test,’ and initially seemed to be a humble individual. When the time came to announce the first king of Israel, we’re told he had “hidden himself among the baggage” (1 Samuel 10:22). But soon the Israelites would learn the truth of the adage, “Be careful what you ask for.”

 

His reign was all downhill from there. He repeatedly ignored God’s commands given through Samuel, and when caught in his sinful disobedience, Saul was quick to cast aside fault, blaming instead the soldiers and people he was chosen to lead. He served as king of Israel for 42 years, but it was a tenure fraught with conflict, jealousy, terrible decision-making, and murder.

 

We find a very striking contrast to Saul in the gospel of John. It’s an unlikely woman Jesus Christ encountered at a well outside the Samaritan city of Sychar. Having been married five times and living with a man who was not her husband, this woman was the face of scandal. To avoid accusatory looks, she would go to the well in the midday heat, knowing no other women would be there.

 

Topping it off, Samaritans were universally despised by Jews. And yet, Jesus – a Jew – chose to honor this disreputable woman with a compassionate conversation that had a surprising outcome, recorded in John 4:4-42. 

 

As she approached the well, bearing the weight not only of her water jars but also her forlorn history, Jesus asked, “Will you give Me a drink?” Looking up at the person speaking to her, she probably thought the Samaritan equivalent of ‘Say what?!’ “You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink?” she responded, perhaps thinking this individual had forgotten the day’s cultural norms.

 

Jesus countered with a statement that caught her attention: “If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked Him and He would have given you living water.” I suspect hearing about “living water” would have gotten our attention as well.

 

As their interaction unfolded, Jesus revealed He was not only a prophet but in fact the promised Messiah – to her utter amazement. Excitedly, she forgot all about getting water from the well and turned into an unwitting evangelist, rushing to tell the townspeople about the person she had just met: “Come, see a man who told me everything I ever did. Could this be the Christ?”

 

The upshot of this story is that many people in Sychar became believers in Christ, some through the woman’s testimony and others after talking with Him directly, curious because of what she had said. 

 

Isn’t it interesting how an outwardly impressive man who became king could turn out to be such an adject failure, while a woman who’d lived such a sorrowful life could be used by God for such a life-changing impact on many people in her community?

 

What a powerful reminder not to limit ourselves to the first impressions people make on us. It’s also encouraging to know that even if we’ve never been the center of attention or voted most likely to succeed, the Lord can still accomplish great things through us.

Much-Deserved Observance for America’s Fallen

Memorial Day. What’s this weekend all about anyway? A three-day weekend of getting together with family and friends for barbecues and picnics – hotdogs, hamburgers, potato salad (here in the South, it’s ‘tater salad’), and all the fixin’s? The annual running of the Indianapolis 500? Or if you prefer, NASCAR’s annual 600-mile race? 

 

Those are fun activities for the holiday weekend, but in fact Memorial Day isn’t about any of those. It’s former name, “Decoration Day” (which some folks still use), emphasized it’s an annual observance highlighted by decorating the graves of soldiers fallen in any of the USA’s past wars.

 

A popular song from years ago included the lyrics, “War – what is it good for? Absolutely nothing!” Lots of people would agree. War – conflict between one group and another, or one country and another – is one of the worst aspects of the human condition, and it’s been that way from time immemorial.

 

Unpleasant as it is, we can’t ignore the reality of war. For the warriors and soldiers involved, their loved ones, and those who know little about the ravages of war, it’s good that Memorial Day is observed. Ours is far from a perfect nation, but the freedoms we enjoy, the rights and privileges many other nations don’t offer, were hard-earned – at the cost of many lives. Those who died should be remembered and honored for their noble sacrifices.

 

Those brave individuals who fought and lost their lives in the Revolutionary War, the Civil War, World War I, World War II, the Korean War, Vietnam, and on many fronts in the Middle East, deserve our gratitude and recognition. They didn’t choose to die but were willing to pay the price if necessary.

 

My father, thankfully, wasn't among them. He saw battle in the U.S. Army with both infantry and artillery units as a commissioned officer and was wounded twice, as the two Purple Hearts he was awarded attest. But he saw many fellow soldiers who did die. Dad never wanted to talk about what war was like. Most of the memories he brought back from the battlefields weren't pleasant, and he didn’t want not to revisit them. 

 

Since my dad departed from this life early, at the age of 62, I was only 31 and very much immersed in forging a career and building a family. I wish I could have had more time with him, especially to thank him for his service and the scars from war, both physical and psychological, that he carried for most of his adult life.

 

Thinking about the many thousands who died for the freedoms and rights we so often take for granted, I’m reminded of the words Jesus Christ spoke to His closest disciples. He wasn’t talking about war, but what He said resonates just the same. Jesus declared, “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends” (John 15:13). 

 

In the most important sense, Jesus was speaking about what He was about to do on the cross, dying to make once-and-for-all atonement for our sins. As Romans 5:8 states, “…God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” That was the very ultimate of ‘ultimate sacrifices.’

 

But when we think about it – there being no greater love than laying down one’s life for one’s friends – this is exactly what fallen American heroes through the centuries have done. Whether at Bunker Hill and Cowpens, Bull Run and Gettysburg, Somme and Verdun, Pearl Harbor and Normandy, Inchon and Heartbreak Ridge, Khe Sahn and Hamburger Hill, or the Gulf War, many breathed their last to serve and defend people like us. They need to be remembered.

 

The book of Ecclesiastes, which many Bible scholars believe was written by King Solomon, often presents a rather cynical look at life. For instance, Ecclesiastes 1:11 declares, “There is no remembrance of earlier things; and also of the later things which will occur, there will be for them no remembrance among those who will come later still.” Let this never be true for what Memorial Day represents.