Have you noticed that life isn’t easy? When we’re children, our parents ask us to do tough stuff like, “Eat your peas,” “Pick up your toys,” and “Don’t jump in the mud puddle.” Who knew being a kid could be so demanding?
We transition to adolescence and our teen years, and things are still hard. We’re required to do homework, clean up our rooms, get our first job, learn how to drive, and be home by curfew. None of those is easy.
Even as we get older and more mature, life doesn’t ease up. Getting a college education or technical training to begin a career; seeking full-time employment and then doing the work; finding a place to live, paying bills, and trying to live as a responsible adult. None of which is the proverbial walk in the park.
Listening to the radio while driving to another state, I heard a different perspective on the hard things in life. A poem attributed to Devon Brough made the following observations:
“Marriage is hard. Divorce is hard. Choose your hard.
Obesity is hard. Being fit is hard. Choose your hard.
Being in debt is hard. Being financially disciplined is hard. Choose your hard.
Communication is hard. Not communicating is hard. Choose your hard.
Life will never be easy. It will always be hard. But we can choose our hard. Pick wisely.”
At the very least, this prompts us to stop and think, doesn’t it? Take the first point: When we choose to get married, that’s the easy part. Choosing to stay married, when the ‘richer or poorer,’ ‘sickness and health’ parts start kicking in, is a very different matter. Just within the past week I’ve talked with two friends whose adult daughters are choosing to get divorces. They’ve discovered marriage is hard. Divorce, they’ll soon learn, is hard too. Moving forward they will have to ‘choose their hard.’
The hardness of being in debt is something I can relate to easily. Struggling in debt was very hard – the easy part is never forgetting how hard it was. It took a lot of time, discipline, sacrifice and the grace of God to get out of debt. Choosing that ‘hard’ was well worth it.
Researching on the poem above, I saw that some pushed back against its message, noting sometimes the hard things in life are thrust upon us through no fault of our own. While that’s true, we still have the option of choosing how to respond to adverse circumstances, whatever they are.
I just finished reading Though He Fall, a biography by Scott Mitchell. In it he recounts an evening outing with some college friends when he slipped and fell off a cliff, dropping of more than 70 feet. He suffered severe injuries to his spine and legs, leaving him a paraplegic. While he didn’t use the phrase ‘choose your hard,’ Mitchell had to do just that.
He could have chosen to wallow in self-pity and resign to defeat because of his disability. Instead, he endured the agonies of rehabilitation, physical therapy and numerous setbacks, determining to maintain a positive attitude anchored in his faith in Jesus Christ. Despite being confined to a wheelchair, Mitchell learned to drive a car using hand controls, graduated from college with a ministerial degree, got married, had a fruitful itinerant preaching ministry, and even pastored two churches for nearly 20 years.
The Scriptures are replete with teachings that support the “choose your hard” approach to life, including the all-important decision of whether to follow Christ. After leading the Israelites into the Promised Land, Joshua acknowledged they had an important choice to make, being surrounded by peoples worshiping pagan gods. He declared, “…if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve…. But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord” (Joshua 24:15).
We each face a similar choice today. The world around us presents a variety of ‘gods’ and idols we can worship, including materialism, prestige, popularity, self-gratification, and various ideologies. But no matter which we choose to follow, we’ll find the way is hard, frustrating, and offers rewards that are temporary at best.
The alternative is to commit our lives to following the Lord, even though that path is hard as well. It’s our faith that enables us to face, accept and even revel in adversity. We can trust in promises like the one God gave the Israelites during their exile in Babylon: “‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future’” (Jeremiah 29:11).
We also have assurances like Romans 8:28, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.” And Proverbs 3:5-6, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.”
God never promised that following and serving Him in this life would be easy. There is no promises of rose gardens in the Bible. In fact, Psalm 34:19 tells us, “Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all.”
The ultimate ‘choose your hard’ is whether to live with the Lord and live for Him – or to live without Him. As Joshua said, we must choose for ourselves this day whom we will serve. Choose wisely.