Decision-Making and the Will of God

Have you ever thought about how many decisions we make during a lifetime? Or even over the course of a single day?

 

Probably not, because we’re too busy making decisions to bother tabulating how many we’ve made. But as a speaker recently reminded me, from the time we reach high school, life becomes an endless parade of one decision after another.

 

When we’re kids, the ‘decisions’ we make are more like impulses: Which toy to play with. Whether to eat the food Mom puts in front of us. Whether to read a book or play a video game on our tablet. Whether to clean up our room as we’re told. At that stage of life, we don’t really calculate the significance or consequences of what we do. It’s simply a matter of ‘I want to’ or ‘I don’t want to.’

Decisions – and the decision-making process – take on much more gravity when we reach the high school level. In high school we start to discover and confirm our interests. We decide whether to try out for sports – and which ones. Or we can opt for things like band, which I did. Being in our school marching, concert and dance bands were the highlights of my time at ole Franklin High.

 

As a freshman, being on the college-prep track, I had to choose things like which foreign language to study and which elective subjects to take. I chose Latin and Spanish, which turned out to be very beneficial for my writing career – even though I didn’t realize it then. I also took a year of personal typing, another serendipitous decision that would prove extremely useful.

 

From high school, our decisions become more numerous and complex. Should I go to college? And if so, which one? What should I major in? If I don’t go to college, which line of work should I pursue? We make decisions about where to live, whether to accept a job offer, which car to buy, whether we’re on the right career path, whether we should get married (and to whom), whether we should have children (and when)?

 

Before we know it, we’ve made thousands of decisions, some with very little thought but others we agonized over, realizing they could have long-term ramifications.

 

How are we to master this lifelong process of decision-making? I’m reminded of the young man who asked his mentor, “How do you make good decisions?” The mentor answered, “Through experience.” “How do I gain experience?” the protégé asked. His mentor smiled and replied, “By making bad decisions.”

 

No one wants to make bad decisions, but inevitably we will. Our hope is that the consequences of bad decisions aren’t too serious and can be remedied.

 

There are many perspectives on how to make decisions. For instance, the late New York Yankees catcher and ‘sage’ Yogi Berra suggested to someone, “If you find a fork in the road, take it.” Poet Robert Frost, in “The Road Not Taken,” one of his best-known poems, wrote about “Two roads diverged in a wood, and I – I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.”

 

Those of us who are followers of Jesus Christ wrestle with decision-making from a different angle. We ask, “What is God’s will?” reasoning that if God is omniscient – all-knowing – then it would be a good idea to know what He expects of us. The problem is, His will isn’t always clear, especially in regard to specific options we’re considering.

 

For instance, nowhere in the Scriptures does it say, “Go to XYZ College,” or “Work for Such-and-Such Company.” The Bible doesn’t tell us which car to drive. Nor does it specify the name of the person we should marry.

 

However, the Word of God does provide us with sound principles to follow for making crucial decisions. If I’m wondering, “What flavor ice cream cone should I buy?” I’m pretty sure God would say, “Makes no difference to Me. You choose.” But if we’re weighing whether to attend a party where we know there will be an abundance of alcohol and raucous behavior, even a cursory look at the Scriptures makes clear what His will is. We’re told in 1 Thessalonians 4:37, “It is God’s will that you should be sanctified…. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life.”

 

In some cases, God’s will couldn’t be more obvious. In 1 Thessalonians 5:18, for example, we’re told, “in everything give thanks, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” In other words, whether we find ourselves in desirable or undesirable circumstances, we’re to be thankful for them, trusting God is working through them for our ultimate good.

 

The apostle Peter admonished, “It is better, if it is God’s will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil” (1 Peter 3:17). We will encounter suffering in this life. There’s no question about that. But we should make certain when suffering comes, we haven’t brought it on ourselves. That’s God’s will.

 

If we want to learn how to make good decisions – and avoid making bad ones – there’s no better source for counsel than God’s Word. Whether it’s learning from the bad decisions made by central figures of the Old Testament; drawing insight from wisdom books like Psalms and Proverbs; or studying and seeking to apply the teachings of Jesus, we can find more than enough help for navigating the complex and often confusing world of decision-making.

As Proverbs 1:7 instructs, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction.” Good decision-making starts with knowing God, trusting Him, and obeying what He says. 

We Can Be Certain About Life’s Uncertainty

Be honest: Has life turned out pretty much the way you expected? No major changes in direction, just about everything going according to plan? If that’s the case for you, congratulations. You’re in a very small minority – perhaps the only one. 

 

Life has a way of taking unexpected detours, especially when the path ahead seems certain and without obstacles. As someone has said, “Life is what happens to you while you’re making other plans.” This observation’s been attributed to a number of different people, but I suspect it originated with someone like Aristotle or Socrates. 

Then there’s the wit and “wisdom” of Yogi Berra, the iconic New York Yankees’ catcher who once quipped, “When you come to a fork in the road, take it.” Poet Robert Frost stated it a bit differently, perhaps more profoundly when he wrote, “Two roads diverged in a wood, and I – I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.”

 

Looking back over the course of my own life to this point, I’ve encountered quite a few forks in the road. And I’d like to think I’ve taken at least a few roads less traveled, although admittedly not always of my own choosing. 

 

There’s no way I could have predicted the course my life and career would take: Where I would start going to college, where I’d end up, and that journalism would be my final major. Spending a decade as editor of community newspapers. Overseeing publications for several parachurch ministries and non-profits. Interviewing dozens of “Who’s Who” folks while myself qualifying only for “Who’s He?” Writing not just a book or one magazine article, but many.

 

Most unexpected has been the spiritual journey I’ve been on, especially over the past 40-plus years. For whatever reason, I always believed in God. Maybe it’s because, “He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world,” as Ephesians 1:4 states. However, in my early years I knew nothing of that. Aside from Sunday church attendance, I lived as a practical atheist, busily doing my own thing, trying to do life on my own terms. Except during times of crisis, when in my “foxhole faith” I’d remember to call on God. Once the crisis passed, it was back to captaining my own ship. 

 

Then in my early 30s I encountered a pastor – a former journalist – who excelled at presenting biblical truth in ways that were both practical and relevant for my life. Through His teaching the Scriptures came alive. For the first time I realized the Bible was not as I would have termed it then, “a manual for preachers,” but God’s guidebook for living. Who knew it would become the spiritual GPS for my life?

 

The complexities and convolutions of life can be confounding. We’d all like to believe we’re in control, but time and experience reveal that’s an illusion. Another poet, Robert Burns, summed it up well: “The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry.” What then are we to do? Gnash our teeth in frustration? Sit in a corner and pout? Shake our fists in anger because luck, fate – or God – won’t allow things to work as we think they should?

 

There was a time when I’d do one or more of those things. Thankfully, one of the key lessons along my spiritual trek has been that Father knows best – our heavenly Father that is, not the affable TV character portrayed by actor Robert Young in the 1950s. As Proverbs 20:24 phrases it, “A man’s steps are directed by the Lord. How then can anyone understand his own way?” 

 

Just when we think we’ve got things figured out, God changes them around because He’s got a better idea. This doesn’t mean we shouldn’t plan and set goals. It doesn’t mean if God gives us a vision for something we shouldn’t pursue it. But we need to understand, as the Lord declares in Isaiah 55:9, “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts.”

When following Jesus Christ, we must learn to be flexible, adaptable. We need to write our goals and plans not in pen, but in pencil (with good erasers). Unlike the “long and winding road” that left the Beatles standing and waiting years ago, in God’s time His road takes us directly to where He wants us to go. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:5-6). 

Are You a Follower, or Just a Fan?

Even though I was never much of an athlete, for as long as I can remember I’ve been an avid sports fan. As a boy growing up in New Jersey, I became a New York Yankees fan when the likes of Mickey Mantle, Whitey Ford and Bobby Richardson were taking the field. It was a time when Yogi Berra was reminding us, “It ain’t over ‘til it’s over.” And in those days, there was a lot for a Yankee fan to feel excited about.

Then after a year of college in Houston, Texas, I transferred to THE Ohio State University and instantly became a Buckeyes fan. The year after I arrived on campus, some guys named Rex Kern, Jack Tatum, Jim Otis, Jim Stillwagon and others led the Bucks to a national championship under Woody Hayes. Again, a great time to be a fan – if your team was OSU. When I was a blood donor, the phlebotomists were always amazed when it came out scarlet and gray.

In both cases, however, I was just a a fan. I wasn’t a follower. After decades of dominance in Major League Baseball, the Yankees fell on hard times and started losing more than they won. My life was getting busier in those days, so I lost interest and ceased being the fervent fan I once had been. Even with the Buckeyes, I have watched every game that I could and reveled in their victories. But during the week, I discovered life could proceed quite well whether Ohio State won or lost.

It’s kind of like that for some people who profess to be Christians. They go to church, sing, maybe raise a hand or two once in a while, and if the message really moves them, they utter an approving “Amen.” But during the week, whether at work, at school or in their homes, there’s not much evidence of Jesus Christ in how they act or what they say. They might be fans of Jesus, but definitely not His followers.

A few years ago, a pastor named Kyle Idleman wrote a book, Not a Fan, in which he addressed this phenomenon. He proposed a distinctively different slant from the type of response offered by people who are asked, for instance, “Do you like peanut butter?” and respond, “Nope. Not a fan.” Jesus doesn’t want fans, Idleman explained. He wants followers.

The Lord made clear there are no shortcuts to being among His faithful followers. There’s a cost involved, one that requires sacrifice. He said, “If anyone who come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me” (Luke 9:23). He wasn’t talking about a mother with a lazy son who comments, “He’s the cross I have to bear.” No, Jesus meant we must be willing to die to ourselves every day – to our own ambitions, goals and desires – and be willing to go and do as He directs instead.

When the apostle Paul wrote, “...I die daily” (1 Corinthians 15:31), he wasn’t referring to a succession of near-death experiences. He was referring to facing constant opposition and enduring a variety of difficult trials and challenges, all for the sake of Jesus Christ and the gospel. 

In a verse I have cited before, we see that Jesus had lots of fans. Multitudes who eagerly chased after Him and hung on His every word. He was by far the best entertainment available. But when the Lord uttered some very difficult teachings, they suddenly remembered some other things they would rather be doing: “From that time many of his disciples turned back and no longer followed him” (John 6:66). 

They were avid fans, but not true followers.

To me, this is one explanation for why, in a nation where polls show a majority of people professing to be Christians, our society is overwhelmed by immorality, violence, hatred and conflict. Sunday morning fans go home, then turn on the afternoon football game or take part in the family picnic or some other diversion, and when Monday morning arrives, it’s like they left Jesus behind in the sanctuary. “See ya next Sunday, Jesus!”

So the question arises. Can we honestly declare, as Idleman wrote, that we’re “Not a Fan”? That instead, we are genuine, willing-to-take-up-our-cross-daily followers of Jesus Christ?

I’m reminded of Robert Frost’s well-known poem, “The Road Not Taken.” In the final stanza he wrote, “Two roads diverged in a wood, and I – I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.” The same applies for us. We can be fans, cheering for Jesus whenever it’s convenient while taking the more heavily traveled course society and culture have paved, or we can take the one “less traveled by,” as true followers of Christ. That indeed will make all the difference.

Deciding Which Road to Take

Over the years I’ve enjoyed the writings of the late poet Robert Frost. Perhaps my favorite is his poem, “The Road Not Taken,” partly because it’s so profound in its simplicity.

Even though it consists of only 20 lines, I’ll not quote it in entirety, but here are the key verses:

The most-traveled path is not
always the best to follow.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair….

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I –

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

That last thought, “I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference,” echoes as a reminder that taking the most popular, well-traveled path may seem convenient but it’s not always the best.

This poem brings to mind another quote I came across some time back: “It’s better to walk alone than with a crowd going in the wrong direction.”

We used to hear a lot about the pitfalls of peer pressure, how striving to please those around us and following their lead could result in serious consequences. That hasn’t changed. It’s probably been the case since the beginning of time. Shepherds understand that sheep are prone to follow each other, even into calamity, and the prophet Isaiah observed thousands of years ago, “We all, like sheep, have gone astray…” (Isaiah 53:6). In many ways we are indeed like sheep, following the crowd, sometimes without a clue about where we’re heading.

At one time the Judeo-Christian ethic was largely embraced in our society – not only in our churches, but also schools, houses of government, and even places of business. That’s where our notions of loving our neighbors as ourselves, doing to others as we would have them do to us, and being kind to strangers came from. Today, however, society as a whole seems intent on drifting away from principles that undergirded our everyday lives – and excluding God from the entire equation.

Increasingly, those of us who believe we stand accountable before a holy, all-knowing, almighty God find ourselves having to take this “road less traveled by.” Does that mean we’re in the wrong, that mankind has suddenly gotten so smart God is no longer necessary? Have we become so “enlightened”?

I doubt it. Highly intelligent people throughout the centuries have honored and worshipped God and viewed their lives and work as ways of serving Him and others. In our culture we tend to equate “blessings” with prosperity, but ironically we’ve been so blessed in that way many people no longer feel a need for God. That’s doesn’t mean He’s no longer there – or that His ways are no longer right.

Jesus often spoke about this, noting that even the religious leaders were more concerned about what other people thought of them than how they were viewed by God. Peer pressure, and the adoration of men, served as their motivations. This is why the Lord admonished His followers, “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well” (Matthew 6:33).

Long before Robert Frost wrote his celebrated poem, Jesus spoke about a spiritual road less traveled. “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it” (Matthew 7:13-14).

This doesn’t mean becoming regulated by a system of rules and rituals, but rather recognizing that although the vast majority may be joining in following a popular path, they may in fact be heading in the wrong direction. As Proverbs 16:25 warns, “There is a way that appears to be right, but in the end it leads to death.”

This is why Joshua, not long before he died, declared to the Israelites he had been leading, “chose for yourselves this day whom you will serve…. But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord” (Joshua 24:15). This is a choice we each must make – it can’t happen by default. If we don’t consciously make this decision, it’s very likely someone will make it for us. And in these times, when people choose the road they will take, it’s not the one that leads to God.

Resolving to Enjoy the Journey

Just because it’s been said many times, that doesn’t mean we don’t need to be reminded: Life is a journey, not a destination. As someone on a talk show observed recently, if we don’t enjoy special moments along the way, we might find the destination isn’t what we thought it would be.

Sometimes in writing blog posts I lecture myself, and this is one of those times. I tend to focus on the destination – the goal – and neglect to stop and smell the proverbial flowers along the way. Maybe that’s one reason I enjoy taking photographs wherever I go. After the trip’s over, I can go back and review the pictures I took, revisit the experience, and maybe remember what I should have been paying closer attention to at the time.

When we’re children we can’t wait to become teenagers, and when we’re teens we’re eager to be grown up. I remember during my college years, the diploma and my career were the focus, but now I fondly recall many stops along that journey. I can’t remember the graduation ceremony, but countless hours on the tennis court, the friends I made, and campus romances remain firmly entrenched in my memory bank.

The pauses along the journey, when
we allow ourselves to catch our
breath and just "be," can provide
us with indelible memories.

I don’t think I did that badly as a dad for our young daughters, but now wish I could have ignored the press of deadlines more and took greater enjoyment in just watching them grow up. But I was building a career, looking to the future, and too often forgot to notice the present.

During my days as a magazine editor, the grind to get out the next edition was paramount, but the planning sessions during which I, the graphic designer, the cartoonist and other members of our editorial team argued and laughed – sometimes at the same time – are what stand out now.

Maybe that’s why Jesus tried to impress upon His followers they were too concerned about tomorrow: 

“But seek first (God’s) kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own” (Matthew 6:33-34).

While the essence of Jesus’ teaching was to trust in God’s provision, He also was pointing out the importance of living in the moment rather than constantly scoping out the horizon.

Another time He told a parable about a wealthy farmer whose crops were so abundant he decided to build bigger barns for storing them. After the construction project was completed the rich man planned to assure himself, “’You have plenty of good things laid up for many years. Take life easy, eat, drink and be merry.’ But God said to him, ‘You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you’” (Luke 12:16-20).

Instead of appreciating the moment, the rich man kept preparing for a future that never arrived.

So what I need to do – and would encourage you to do as well – is become more cognizant of the present, keeping my eyes and ears open as I proceed along this earthly journey, recognizing the course I take is not happenstance, but part of God’s perfect plan for me, my family and people I encounter along the way.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:5-6).

Poet Robert Frost wrote about “The Road Not Taken,” closing with the lines:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

If we concentrate too intently on arriving at our destination, oblivious to what surrounds us along the journey, we could miss that road less traveled by, as Frost called it.

It does help to remain mindful that itinerary changes will occur and should be expected, and not to become annoyed when they do. There’s good reason behind them: “In his heart man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps” (Proverbs 16:9).

I need to make a stronger, more conscious effort to “consider the lilies of the field,” as Jesus said in Matthew 6:28. How about you?