The ‘Born That Way’ Dilemma

Imagine a young man talking with his fiancé as the wedding day approaches and informing her, “Hey, babe, I really love you, and I don’t want you to hear this the wrong way, but there’s something you need to know. Every night I spend about an hour looking at pornography online. I hope you’re okay with that – it’s something I’ve done for as long as I can remember. Guess I was just born that way.”

How do you think the bride-to-be should respond?

Or consider a woman caught in an adulterous affair outside of her marriage. Her husband, who’s been completely faithful to her, feels devastated. Remorsefully the wife looks at her husband and says, “Honey, please don’t take this personally. I love you, but I’ve never been a one-man kind of woman. I think our marriage is great, but sometimes, you know, I enjoy the company of other men. Sorry, but I suppose I was just born that way.”

Does that make sense?

We could think of other scenarios: A compulsive gossip; someone given to uncontrollable fits of anger; a person consumed with jealousy over the professional success of coworkers; an individual caught up with envy (what the Bible calls “coveting”) over a friend’s much bigger, far more expensive house or luxury car; an able-bodied man with no initiative who refuses to seek a job; someone whose pattern of dishonesty makes it virtually impossible to know if or when he’s telling the truth.

Should we give any of them a pass when they offer the excuse, “I was born that way”?

Frankly, every one of us could use that rationale to explain objectionable behavior. After all, the Bible says, “Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me” (Psalm 51:5). This doesn’t mean the sexual act that resulted in conception was wrong. It’s stating just as parents pass along genetic heredity to their children, resulting in specific physical characteristics and traits, from the beginning of time mankind also has passed on the “sin gene” from generation to generation.

Any parent knows you don’t have to teach children to become selfish. They are born that way.

Certain people are predisposed toward diseases like cancer, heart disease, obesity or alcoholism. While others are never troubled by such problems, these individuals must deal with them for much of their lives. Perhaps it’s true they were “born that way.” Should we therefore refuse to offer help or support in their desire to overcome these besetting challenges?

The vast majority of men find themselves confronting lustful thoughts, often sparked by a casual glance. They see an attractive woman, whether in a mall, on a beach, or even in church, and suddenly find themselves entertaining inappropriate thoughts about that person. Since most men are “born this way,” prone to visual provocation, does this mean it’s to be approved of, condoned, even applauded?

We could make similar observations about women, but the point is when it comes to sin – a word the Bible often uses, which many in society would like to eradicate – we all have been “born that way” in one respect or another. As Romans 3:10 declares, “There is no one righteous, not even one.” Later the Bible asserts, “all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23).

Being unique, we all have our own assortment of pet sins and weaknesses. Our spiritual predisposition, from birth, is toward spiritual brokenness in one respect or another. So it troubles us to read passages like Philippians 2:3-4 that admonish, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than ourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.” We want to respond, “Are you kidding? If we don’t look out for ourselves, our best interests, who will? Besides, I can’t help it.”

The fact is, areas of sin that afflict each of  us – behaviors we’d like to shrug off and defend with, “I was born that way” – often are beyond our capacity to change. Old habits die hard, as the saying goes. But the good news, it’s not up to us alone to make the changes.

Jesus told His followers, “Apart from me you can do nothing” (John 15:5), and the apostle Paul – who understood human struggles as well as any – wrote with confidence, “I can do everything through Christ who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13).

So whatever it is we’re wrestling with, seemingly overwhelming problems that just won’t go away, there’s hope. Hope in the life-changing, transforming power of Jesus Christ. The cliché might sound trite, but that doesn’t make it untrue. Sometimes it just requires willingness to “let go – and let God.”

Fascination With Youth

Have you ever found interesting things while looking for something else? You’re digging through a drawer, searching for a receipt, screwdriver, or spool of thread, and find a totally different item you misplaced long ago. Maybe you forgot about it – until you found it.

Spanish explorer Ponce de Leon did something like that in the early 1500’s. It’s said he was searching for the “Fountain of Youth,” hoping to cure his aging. He’d heard stories of vitality-restoring waters, so he went looking for the rumored reservoir. Instead, de Leon discovered what’s now known as Florida.

The Fountain of Youth remains the stuff of folklore, but thanks in part to the adventurous explorer, millions of older people have found in Florida a place to go after their cherished youth has faded. Kind of a newer wrinkle on the old quest.

Ponce de Leon died nearly 600 years ago, but our fascination with youth lives on. The entertainment world exalts youth, trotting out new, fresh-cheeked stars and starlets every year. Actress Jennifer Lawrence, just 23, currently stands tall among celebrated young thespians. This is her day in the sun. Tomorrow, who knows?

My grandfather, Samuel Tamasy, passed
away when I was a boy. I still wish I
could learn from his insights about life.

In the sports world, champion gymnasts rarely compete past their teenage years; swimmers typically hang up their Speedos in their 20’s; football and basketball stars risk being perceived as relics upon entering their 30’s.

Even in the news media, with the onset of gray hair and age lines, veteran broadcasters and commentators find themselves deferring to younger replacements. Youth must be served!

It seems the modern Church isn’t immune either. Recently I read about an unemployed worship leader who was passed over, apparently because a congregation wanted a younger face leading music and directing the choir – someone more appealing for attendees in their teens through early 30’s. In a separate account, older church musicians were displaced by younger performers better able to connect to the teen and 20-something “market” their congregations were targeting.

As an early enlistee of the so-called Baby Boomer generation, I understand drawbacks of aging. Aches and pains don’t go away as quickly. And you discover aches and pains in places you didn’t even know you had! But I think youth is considerably overrated, sadly wasted on the young.

Recently I found encouragement in author Brennan Manning’s view:

“Youth is not a period of time. It is a state of mind, a result of the will, a quality of the imagination, a victory of courage over timidity, of the taste for adventure over the love of comfort…. A man grows old when he deserts his ideal. The years may wrinkle the skin, but deserting his ideal wrinkles his soul…. You will remain young as long as you are open to what is beautiful, good and great; receptive to the messages of other men and women, of nature and of God….”

I like Manning’s observation that not only is youth a state of mind, but also a product of the will and imagination, courage winning over timidity. Energy may ebb, but zeal for those things that fire our passions can be as strong. We might not be as physically resilient, but can strive to remain mentally agile. Ideals can stimulate and motivate.

As Proverbs 20:29 says, ”The glory of young men is their strength; gray hair the splendor of the old.” We’ve lived hard, worked hard, played hard. We’ve survived adversity in its various forms. Gray hair is like a crown, a badge of honor. We’ve earned it.

One of the drawbacks of youth is you can’t teach experience. We older folks have experience galore – perfect for sharing with those who lack it. And one of the best things we can share is what it means to walk consistently with God. Psalm 71:18 states it this way: “Even when I am old and gray, do not forsake me, O God, till I declare your power to the next generation, your might to all who are to come.” The wisdom and insights we’ve gained through the years aren’t to be hoarded – pass them along and let others benefit as well.

We’re all going to get old if we live long enough. The alternative is to do what Marilyn Monroe, Elvis and JFK did, die relatively early. They found a “fountain of youth” of sorts – they’re perpetually young in historic photos and videos, and in our memories. But none of us would favor that approach for retaining our youth.

How about this idea: Rather than the elders staring at the young with envy, and the young viewing those older with disdain, why not strive to learn from one another? We all have much to offer each other. And when the young become old, they’ll also have something to offer the next generation.

Investing in People

Investing in people can take many forms, but the important
thing is that we do make the effort to invest in others.

Two company executives were discussing the considerable cost of training and developing people within their organization. The chief financial officer asked, “What happens if we invest in people, and they leave?”

The CEO looked the CFO in the eyes, paused and then replied, “What happens if we don’t invest in people – and they stay?”

This principle holds true not only for the business world, but also for every facet of life and society. On a football or basketball team, for example, the head coach invests considerable time, energy and experience in developing his assistant coaches. One by one they leave, accepting head coaching jobs of their own. Some might even become coaches for competing teams. Was it worth the coach’s investment in them?

A pastor invests hours every week meeting with several individuals, helping them to learn what a relationship with Jesus Christ really means and then to grow in their faith. Some move into lay leadership positions at the church, but others move to other churches. Did the pastor squander time investing in those taking their learning and spiritual gifts to other congregations?

Parents spend much of their adult lives investing in their children – caring for them from diapers through driver’s licenses and college. Not to mention the financial investment. What if the children move to other parts of the country, become consumed by careers and family pressures, and rarely communicate? Was the parenting investment worthwhile?

Investing in others doesn't have to be
complicated. It can just be "hanging out."

Similar scenarios could be described for mentors, teachers, executive coaches and many other people involved in the growth and development of others.

On TV, we often see commercials about financial investments – how to increase your savings for the future, especially if retirement is approaching. I’ve concluded there is no greater investment than to share one’s time, energy and experience with other people, regardless of whether results feel like “success.” It’s far better to invest in people and lose some of them, than not to invest and be stuck with people operating far below their potential and capabilities.

The Bible can be described in many ways, including the narrative about people investing in others over a span of thousands of years, all in the name of the God they worshipped and served. Abraham invested in Isaac; Jacob invested in his sons; and Moses invested in Joshua. There were Naomi and Ruth, Elijah and Elisha, Samuel and David.

Jesus invested in a handful of ragtag disciples, none of whom would have been voted “most likely to succeed” in their high school yearbook. Yet when He departed from the earth, they were entrusted with carrying on His mission. One of them, Judas Iscariot, failed the course terribly. Barnabas invested in Paul and John Mark, and Paul invested in Timothy, Silas and others. The apostle had failures along the way, too, including a guy named Demas.

Just before He ascended to heaven, Jesus charged His followers, “Therefore go and make disciples of all nations…teaching them to observe everything I have commanded you” (Matthew 28:19). And Paul instructed young Timothy, “And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable men who will also be qualified to teach others” (2 Timothy 2:2).

In Leaders Legacy, the non-profit I work for, we believe the true mark of a leader is not what occurs while he’s in charge, but what happens after he’s gone. Does the work continue and grow, or does it stagnate or die?

A dedicated leader that invests in and develops people in his or her company or organization will leave an enduring legacy, whether those individuals stay with the enterprise and assume greater responsibilities or leave for key leadership roles at other places.

By contrast, poor leaders are those whose enterprises crumble to pieces when they are removed from the picture, much like a house of cards. Their legacy, because of selfishness, pride, and an unwillingness to invest in others, perhaps for fear they might surpass them, is one of failure and futility.

We might not be CEOs or presidents of huge corporations, owners of our own businesses, or even pastors of prominent churches. But we each have a significant sphere of influence – our children, close friends, peers at work, people in organizations where we volunteer. Maybe you’ve benefited from someone investing in you.

The question is: Who are you investing in? And if you’re not investing in them, who is?

Chilling Out . . . While at Work

While many of us are indoors, enjoying picturesque winter scenes
like this in our warm homes, others are out dealing with the elements.

The cold is upon most of us in North America – apparently due to global warming and/or climate change, according to proponents for both. Whatever. One thing is certain: While many of us are bemoaning the subfreezing temperatures, ice, sleet and snow, we’re doing so for the most part in the comforts of our homes or heated, climate-controlled workplaces. “Brrrr!” we declare, gazing out our windows.

That’s why I have great respect and admiration for people that don’t have that option. Like mail carriers who still ascribe to the motto, “Neither rain, nor sleet, nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds." (That, I understand, is the correct wording.) And those who deliver our morning newspapers, although they are a vanishing breed. Unless the roads are really bad, they’re faithfully carrying out their responsibilities.

Many of us can retreat from the cold, but those
entrusted with maintaining vital services cannot.

When disaster strikes and our power goes out, leaving us without electricity and with temperatures steadily dropping between our four walls, or when freezing temps burst water mains, noble utility crews are toiling away despite the elements – cold, wind, frozen precipitation. 

Law enforcement officers, firefighters and emergency workers don’t get “snow days,” and crews charged with clearing our streets to restore safe travel obviously can’t take the day off because of snow and ice.

Hospital staffs must somehow get to work, since sick people don’t suddenly get better when winter storms move in. And news crews must mobilize to keep us updated on the latest weather developments – although I think some of them actually like being on camera with icicles hanging from their noses.

Thinking of the yeoman’s work these people perform, I’m reminded of a passage in the Bible that states, “On the contrary, those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and the parts that we think are less honorable we treat with special honor…. But God has combined the members of the body and has given greater honor to the parts that lacked it” (1 Corinthians 12:22-26).

During good weather we give little thought to the individuals that carry out no-matter-what-the-weather-is kinds of jobs. In many cases they probably wouldn’t be careers we’d want our children to aspire to, but when needed they become the most important people in our communities.

So I commend them for their diligence and sacrifice to help the rest of us stay comfortable, warm and safe. And the next time it snows or ices over, turning our roads into skating rinks and ski slopes, please know: We appreciate you all!

It’s Still Garbage In, Garbage Out

In the early days of computers, when we were just getting used to having them around, there was a common saying: “Garbage in, garbage out.” This meant if programming was faulty, computers would not perform as desired. They either would malfunction or not operate at all. Today almost everyone has a computer and non-techies like me don’t worry much about programming. But the adage is still true.

If you install flawed software on your computer, or the existing software becomes corrupted (perhaps by bad company?), you’re going to become very distressed. Computers are supposed to do what we want them to do; when they don’t, we’re tempted to express some words that aren’t suitable around children or at formal social gatherings.

Speaking of which, I’ve heard the recently released Martin Scorsese film, “The Wolf of Wall Street,” is being called the “swearingest film” of all time, employing the f-word more than 500 times. (Who was responsible for the official count, I don’t know, but that’s not a job I’d want.) Based on the length of the film, the word was used, on average, about every 20 seconds!

I haven’t seen the film, which stars Leonardo DiCaprio, and won’t. Why pay good money to be bombarded by dialogue that sounds like someone gargled with dirty toilet water? My mind is exposed to enough garbage during the course of an ordinary day. I don’t need to go to a theater and buy some more.

Hollywood seems so very fond of the so-called “f-bomb.” In some quarters the film aristocracy apparently regard it as sophisticated, cool, or something like that. I think it’s simply an excuse for lazy, unimaginative script writing and cesspool thinking that masquerades as “creativity.” It also shows a lack of respect for many members of the viewing public.

There might be occasions when using profanity can be justified. But when usage of a word that’s unacceptable in most public settings is spewed excessively, at machine-gun pace, how can that be excused? Maybe that’s how those directors and actors speak in private as well, so for them it seems normal. In that case, I won’t be inviting them over for dinner.

Based on how you're programming
your mind, what are the words most
 likely to come out of your mouth?

As Proverbs 4:24 wisely advises, “Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk far from your lips.” Ephesians 4:29 adds, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”

Granted, in moments of anger or frustration a profane word might slip out, but when such words become as common as periods at the end of sentences, something’s awry. It’s to no one’s benefit.

But the larger issue – that of garbage in, garbage out – goes far beyond motion picture dialogue. We need to be careful of how we “program” our minds in every way. Romans 12:2 admonishes, “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind….” Each day our minds are renewed, influenced and shaped by what we allow into them.

I frequent some social media sites, but have noticed the gossip and negativity that make up much of the content we read can undermine our thought patterns. Some people apparently ascribe to the motto, “If you can't think of something bad to say, don’t say anything at all.” So I try to avoid “friends” like that.

Years ago I was an avid reader of horror novels and stories about the occult. I enjoyed a good scare. But after my pastor gave a sermon about the occult, I asked his opinion of my reading preference. He didn’t respond with judgment, but simply replied, “Well, when you read those books, are they pointing you to God – or away from Him.”

Thinking about what he said, I realized that whenever I was reading books like that my tension level would increase, interactions with other people became harsh, and the pervasive language that typified such novels certainly wasn’t helping my own speech to be “edifying,” as the Bible describes it. They definitely weren’t pointing me toward God.

I often wonder about the extreme violence depicted in many video games today, all in the name of “entertainment.” If it’s entertaining to immerse yourself in a virtual experience in which people are killed, blown up and maimed, is it any surprise that at least some of the perpetrators of mass violence have histories of having been engrossed in such “games”?

The human mind has often been described as the most complex, sophisticated and wondrous computer ever observed. But as with electronic computers, programming makes all the difference in how our cerebral computers operate: How we think, the way we act, and what we say.

How are you programming your mind today?

The Time of Your Life

We sometimes hear people exclaim, “I’m having the time of my life!” I’ve probably said that myself a time or two, but what does it really mean?

Figuratively it refers to having much enjoyment, maybe more than we can ever remember. But when have you heard someone say, “I’m not having the time of my life”? In reality, like it or not, “the time of our life” is now, this very moment. What happened even one second ago is already locked into the past, and we can’t live in the future – until it arrives in the present, at which time it ceases to be the future, strangely enough.

Not to get too philosophical, but time is important to all of us. And as we get older, we learn to value time even more since there’s more of it behind us and less of it ahead of us in this life. When we were children, time seemed to move at a snail’s pace, especially when awaiting a special event, like summer vacation or Christmas. Now it seems to pass at racetrack speed.

In the newspaper business, I found time often defined by deadlines: getting articles written, photos taken and pages designed on time for going to press. Time literally was money, with presses idling and well-paid pressmen poised to print the publication. So we all felt the pressure of time.

When I moved into the business world I was introduced to “time management,” which is a misnomer. We can’t manage time any more than we can manage the wind. Unlike saving money or storing food for a future emergency, time can’t be set aside for later consumption. Time comes and goes with relentless precision, one second, one minute, one hour at a time.

The Bible says there is a time for
everything.  Our challenge is to know
which time is right.

Although we can’t control or slow time’s passage, we can determine how our time is utilized. We can set priorities, determining which things must be done and distinguishing those from other things that might be nice to do, but aren’t essential. As Oswald Chambers would say, conceding “good is the enemy of the best.” Or distinguishing the important from the tyrannical urgent.

In our leisure hours we can read thought-provoking books, play challenging games, and engage in stimulating conversations. Or we can fritter away minutes and hours watching meaningless TV programming or listen to continual radio talk show chatter, our minds becoming sponges for media clutter. We can pursue a productive hobby, participate in regular exercise, and nurture our spiritual life. Or we can squander time by eating and drinking more than we need, sleeping more than we should, spending more than we ought, and procrastinating like champions.

We also can “manage time” by cherishing opportunities we have with loved ones, recognizing those can’t be reclaimed at some later date. I suspect when beloved friends and family members pass away, a part of our grieving is regret over “wouldas, shouldas and couldas” forever lost.

God, who created time, speaks of it a lot in the Scriptures. Psalm 90:12, for example, suggests we ask God to “Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” If you knew today – or this week – were your last, would you continue with your plans for this day?

Ecclesiastes 3:1 declares, “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven.” Many of the things we purpose to do, those activities we spend much time planning, are good. But when’s the best time for pursuing them? And when should we stop doing some of the things that have been taking up too much of our time?

And Ephesians 5:16 speaks of “making the most of your time (redeeming it), because the days are evil.” Time, as they say, has a stealthy habit of slipping away when we’re not paying attention. Then we wish wistfully, “If only I had more time.”

Even in a clock, watch or calendar shop, we can’t purchase or acquire more time. But we can “manage” it by appreciating the time we have and utilizing it, better yet – investing it – in ways that will pay dividends both immediate and long-term.

We’re still early in the new year. It would be great if instead of bemoaning at year end, “Where has the time gone?” we could smile and think, “I know exactly where the time has gone. And I believe it’s been well-spent.” It’s good to stop and smell the roses, as long as we don’t become consumed by the weeds.

No Defense for ‘The Fence’

Perhaps you’ve heard this story, but it’s worth repeating. It’s about a young man with a terrible temper and the strategy his father used to deal with the problem.

After another of his son’s verbal outbursts, the father gave him a bag of nails and instructed him that every time he lost his temper, the boy was to hammer a nail into the wooden fence behind their house. On the first day of this lesson, the little fellow had to drive nearly 40 nails into the fence. He was really angry that day.

Over the course of the next several weeks, the boy continued to obey his father and hammered a nail every time he lost his temper. Slowly he discovered he could control his temper. As he did, the number of nails he had to hammer decreased. The day arrived when the boy succeeded in not losing his temper a single time. Feeling triumphant, he couldn’t wait to tell his father the news.

The dad was pleased, but to reinforce the lesson he suggested for every succeeding day his son didn’t lose his temper, the boy should pull out one of the nails he had hammered into the fence.

Weeks went by until one day the boy announced all the nails had been removed. With a smile, the father gently took his son’s hand and led him to the fence. “You’ve done very well, my son,” the dad observed, “but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same.”

The father concluded the lesson: “When you say things in anger, they leave permanent scars just like these. And no matter how many times you say you’re sorry, or how often you apologize, the wounds remain. So be very careful with your words – and how you use them.”

“Stick and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me” was the adage I often heard as a child, but I’ve since learned it’s untrue. The pain we suffer from harmful words often endures long after physical pain ends. Parents that call their children “stupid” or make other disparaging comments may not realize it, but those words will probably echo in the minds of their offspring well into their adult years.

Be careful where you're
pounding those nails.

Earlier in my life if I became angry, I’d say whatever was on my mind. Kind of my speak-first, think-later approach to communicating. “Ready, fire, aim!” Then I realized, like the nails pounded into the fence, my words spoken in anger would leave wounds and scars that were slow to disappear, if ever. A Bible passage provided great wisdom: “In the abundance of words, transgression is unavoidable, but he who restrains his lips is wise” (Proverbs 10:19).

In fact, Proverbs has a lot to say about anger and words carelessly spoken. For instance, it states, “He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin” Proverbs 13:3). And Proverbs 29:11 advises, “A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control.”

Without question, this life presents much we can get angry about. Some of us are more prone toward anger than others. But “I can’t help it” doesn’t justify harmful, hurtful outbursts. As 1 Corinthians 10:13 declares, “No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.”

Do I still get angry? Yup. Do I still want to blurt out thoughts in anger, giving people a piece of my mind I can’t afford to lose? Sadly, yes. But I’m much better than I used to be. I’ve learned “the devil made me do it” isn’t an excuse. And I’ve also realized what happens if you keep pounding those nails. When you pull them out, the evidence remains.

Better Buckle Up

If you haven’t noticed, there’s a concerted effort to convince everyone to wear seatbelts. Studies have shown people that drive or ride in cars without seatbelts fastened have a much higher risk of serious injury or death in an accident. Some states have even waxed poetic, warning drivers to “Click It or Ticket.”

When I was a kid, no one knew anything about seatbelts. It’s a wonder any of us lived to tell about it. You just got in the front or back seat and your parents instructed you to “sit still!” The danger, in our minds, was discipline from mom or dad, not forward momentum in the event of a sudden stop.

With childlike faith, toddlers
submit to car seat and seatbelts.

Today, however, we’re wiser and most of us “click it.” We’ve heard and accepted the safety message. Engineers have even performed great feats in designing car seats for infants and toddlers to protect them from highway mayhem. Most of the time kids don’t argue about being buckled in, although they usually don’t know where they’re going or why, or how long it will take to get there.

Trustingly they endure the seatbelt restraints and relax in their places, except for the occasional “Are we there yet?” To which the astute mom or dad replies, “No, we’re not there yet. If we were, would we still be in the car?”

We don’t give it much thought, but submitting to car seat and seatbelt without question is an act of faith for young ones. How do they know they’re not being taken to the zoo, to be fed to the lions? Or to a restaurant that serves only chicken livers and Brussels sprouts? With trusting hearts they ride along, staring at the backs of their parents’ heads or observing the passing scenery, awaiting arrival at who knows where – or when.

We’re now in the first week of 2014, and while we don’t feel seatbelts surrounding us as we proceed into the year, we suspect we’re in for quite a ride. We don’t know where we’re going or what things will be like when we get there. All we know for certain is we’re on our way.

One of the advantages of having faith in God is even though we’re as uncertain about the future as anyone else, we have confidence our “tour guide” knows where we’re going and won’t let us get lost. “In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps” (Proverbs 16:9).

People wary of what lies ahead are sometimes described as “sheepish,” and there couldn’t be a more appropriate term. In Psalm 23, a passage familiar to many of us, we find the metaphor of a shepherd leading his sheep. “The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me to lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters…. He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sale. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you (the Lord) are with me.”

Envision a toddler fastened in a child-restraining carrier in the back seat, trusting mom or dad – whoever’s driving – to safely transport her to the destination. She’ll probably even nap along the way, and when the route gets dark or the road gets a little slick, she’s still trusting the proper care will be taken to keep her safe.

How can the child know for sure mom and dad will always provide protection and exercise caution? She can’t, except for the eyes and heart of childlike faith. And that’s exactly what God expects of us. Jesus said, “I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a child will never enter it” (Mark 10:15).

Children have such a simple, sincere faith; somehow we seem to lose that as adults, insisting the why’s and what’s and wherefore’s be fully explained. God doesn’t demand blind, unreasoning faith as we travel along life’s journey. At the same time, however, it’s like he’s saying, “I can’t explain everything to you. Even if I tried, you wouldn’t understand it. So just trust me.”

And buckle up. We’re in for a crazy ride!

What the World Needs Now Is . . . Serenity?

Could anything be more peaceful, more serene than a quiet
pond on a warm day with a gentle breeze passing by?

A new year has begun, but if you could give the world a belated Christmas gift, what would it be? How about…serenity?

It seems the world around us offers anything but serenity. Violence, wars, crime and terrorism command the headlines most days. Predictions of economic disaster worry us. We’ve lost trust in our government leaders to do the right thing. Extreme weather and the threat of natural disasters keep us unsettled. The fear of receiving bad news, such as having loved ones encounter grave diseases or tragic accidents, keeps us in a state of anxiety. Even positives in life – cell phones, social media, the Internet, incessant news and talk – are enough to disturb the peace in our lives.

It’s gotten to the point where if you say the word, “serenity,” we wonder, “What in the heck is that?” Is it reclining in a field surrounded by flowers on a warm, sunny day with a gentle breeze brushing our face? Sitting in our favorite chair with an engrossing book without the constant clamor of TV in the background? Having a pleasant conversation with a friend without the risk of emotions boiling over into a heated argument? Or listening to a symphony, its familiar melodies and harmonies, pauses and crescendos calming our minds and touching our hearts?

Most of us are familiar with the so-called “Serenity Prayer” used by organizations like Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous: “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage the change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.” I like how it starts: “God.” Try as we might, I’m convinced true, lasting peace isn’t possible apart from God.

Yes, we can easily find distractions or choose to ignore the chaos surrounding us. But serenity – the “peace that passes all understanding,” as Philippians 4:7 describes it – can only be found in a sovereign God who rules and overrules our circumstances and the troubling issues we confront every day.

Thinking about the Serenity Prayer, which originally was an untitled prayer by American theologian Reinhold Niebuhr, did you know there’s more to his prayerful reflection? It continues:

Living one day at a time; 


Enjoying one moment at a time; 


Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; 


Taking, as He did, this sinful world
 as it is, not as I would have it;

Trusting that He will make all things right 
if I surrender to His Will;

That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him


Forever in the next.

Amen.

So in Niebuhr’s view, serenity is more than being able to distinguish between what we can change and what we cannot. It’s cultivating the capacity to live a day at a time, a moment at a time. It’s accepting the hard times in life as well as the easy ones.

It’s seeking to see this broken world as God sees it, rather than the way we’d like it to be, trusting He’s busily at work to redeem and reconcile His people and His creation to His original design. And it’s being able to look past this life, holding great anticipation for the life to come.

Shortly before going to the cross as the atoning sacrifice for the sins of mankind, Jesus voiced these words of encouragement to His followers: “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid” (John 14:27).

If we can believe that promise, living and acting according to it, we’ll discover serenity isn’t as far from our grasp as we suspected.